How to stop falling for a girl who don't want anything serious?

[noumena]

How can I train my nervous system not to fall for a girl who doesn't want anything serious?

I have an obsessive nature when it comes to romantic interests. I tend to get emotionally attached and obsessed, regardless of whether the feelings are mutual or one-sided.

How can I stop constantly checking whether she has texted me? How can I stop wondering why she didn't send me a good morning text today? How can I stop overthinking that she's pulling away, especially because she's done it before? And most importantly, how can I overcome the constant fear that she might leave me?

 

[crowolf]

Short answer:

It's called having an "anxious attachment style". Look it up.

The best way to live with it is by not seeking relationships with people who have an "avoidant attachment style".

Perhaps now it is still tempting for you, but after a while you will probably come to the conclusion that it's healthier for your nervous system to not get involved with people who are unhealthy for you.

 

[noumena]

Short answer:

It's called having an "anxious attachment style". Look it up.

The best way to live with it is by not seeking relationships with people who have an "avoidant attachment style".

Perhaps now it is still tempting for you, but after a while you will probably come to the conclusion that it's healthier for your nervous system to not get involved with people who are unhealthy for you.

What are the chances I can change my attachment style?

 

[Poonstra]

To start read all of this:

Don Juan Bible

 

[Gamisch]

You need to bump uour head against the wall.

Hopefully just once, but if you're anything like me it might take more times before you fecking finally learn your lesson...

Women come and go. The tricky thing is that if YOU are attached more than she is ,she will be gone without notice. Aka you might still be in close contact with her, even sleep with her but MENTALLY she check out already ....

The better batteries have this safety mechanism that only allows them to charge for like 85%. Thats how your love/ attachment should be. NEVER 100%. There always needs to be like 15 % of you that's completely unavailable. That will allow you to take the hit and move on faster.

At your age you gotta learn FAST. You can't waste too much time anymore. You gotta observe ,try, succeed.

 

[The Duke]

How can I train my nervous system not to fall for a girl who doesn't want anything serious?

I have an obsessive nature when it comes to romantic interests. I tend to get emotionally attached and obsessed, regardless of whether the feelings are mutual or one-sided.

How can I stop constantly checking whether she has texted me? How can I stop wondering why she didn't send me a good morning text today? How can I stop overthinking that she's pulling away, especially because she's done it before? And most importantly, how can I overcome the constant fear that she might leave me?

You have to practice self control. Realize doing the things you are doing isn't healthy. Its better to occupy your time with productive things. Keep yourself busy. Start some new project, or take up some hobby you have been wanting to do. Go somewhere.

Seek out other girls as well. You can bet she is at least keeping her options open.

A lot of this is your irrational brain playing jokes on your rational brain. Stop and ask yourself why and is this rational?

 

[BackInTheGame78]

You need to learn to self-regulate or you are going to end up getting chewed up and spit out in relationships your entire life.

This type of behavior is not attractive and comes off as needy, desperate and causes women to turn and run the other way as fast as possible.

How do you stop? Do the hard work on yourself and understand that you don't need someone else's validation to be OK with yourself. You need to be OK with yourself on your own regardless of who else says you are.

 

[BaronOfHair]

@noumena "How can I stop constantly checking whether she has texted me?"

When you experience that urge, take a few deep breaths, and don't reach for your device

 

[BadBoy89]

Find a girl who is younger and hotter.

 

[Sega Genesis]

How can I train my nervous system not to fall for a girl who doesn't want anything serious?

Find a girl who is younger and hotter.

BadBoy, it appears OP is seeking a serious relationship and keeps falling for women who don't.

He also suffers from severe anxiety and has an obsessive nature.

Totally get the fascination with young and hot but in this case, a younger and hotter girl would in all likelihood make this worse! Lol

His profile says he is 29 so I would assume he's already dating young women in their 20s.

OP re your anxiety and obsessive nature, agree with @BackInTheGame78 and others.

Once you get a handle on that, you'll attract more women, some of whom will want what you want (serious)... Some won't.

Pay attention to actions and abort early if she displays behavior and values that don't match yours and what you're seeking.

 

[Pacman50]

As soon as I detect disinterest I stop replying, delete the number, block on social media, suffer for a week, move on to the next lol

 

[BadBoy89]

BadBoy, it appears OP is seeking a serious relationship and keeps falling for women who don't.

He also suffers from severe anxiety and has an obsessive nature.

Totally get the fascination with young and hot but in this case, a younger and hotter girl would in all likelihood make this worse! Lol

His profile says he is 29 so I would assume he's already dating young women in their 20s.

It's anxiety because OP lacks options with hot girls. He's not concerned about single mothers in their 30s not texting him back or saying good morning.