RichardTheFrog
Banned
Through my drunken haze last night, I can remember several times when I had opportunities to start conversations, but didn't.
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
A couple minutes is a super long time for a conversation.Don't drink so much next time, have a water between every drink so you're not so buzzed. Then just approach and say, hi my name is.... You'll know within a couple minutes whether she is curious or not. Don't complicate it.
If you introduce yourself and a woman completely blows you off that's one thing... but generally, women will entertain a conversation with you for a few minutes regardless. This is where you can gauge her initial interest level. Being buzzed or completely drunk will naturally lower your social skills, so that's why I suggest to taper the drinking while you're out.A couple minutes is a super long time for a conversation.
One time, I tried the 3 second rule, I ended up just standing there with nothing to say after 3 seconds.