RichardTheFrog
Banned
Through my drunken haze last night, I can remember several times when I had opportunities to start conversations, but didn't.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
How to properly introduce yourself at a bar?
- Thread starter RichardTheFrog
- Start date
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Trailboss
Don Juan
The easiest way to start a "banter"...? She approaches you and says something like "Hey Sailor...buy me a drink"? You look at her critically and say "I'm sorry...did you lose your job today"? She will probably laugh or snort a bit...say "No...I have a job"! And you say "Then No...I won't buy you a drink...but you can buy me one! And if I like you, I will return the favor". Something like that...anything other then "Sure...I'll buy you a drink". Cus then you are fooked.....
logicallefty
Moderator
All women have a phone and few can put it down. I have busted on that. Something like
"Hey Siri from your phone just called me and she told me to tell you she's exhausted and wants you to put her down and give her a break!"
Have your convo, then to close:
"I forgot to save the number when Siri called. Go ahead and give it to me again"
"Hey Siri from your phone just called me and she told me to tell you she's exhausted and wants you to put her down and give her a break!"
Have your convo, then to close:
"I forgot to save the number when Siri called. Go ahead and give it to me again"
Move your feet & open your mouth. Intent. Then, action. These are the only two steps that are completely necessarily to a successful approach. Everything else can be detrimental or beneficial, but none of that matters unless you take the first two steps.
Next comes strong eye contact. You have to be unapologetic & honest in your intent. Then you just have to keep talking. Even if she likes you, she may not know what to say and it might take her brain a couple minutes to warm up to the situation.
If I can't think of anything situational to comment on, I just say, "Hey, I want you to meet me." Straightforward. Simple. Low pressure. Sets the frame that you're the prize. From there, just cold reads to get her talking about herself. Doesn't really matter what you say but just keep things positive and fun. The most important thing is how you feel about yourself.
If things go poorly just say, great meeting you, have an awesome night, smile and walk away & open the next set.
Next comes strong eye contact. You have to be unapologetic & honest in your intent. Then you just have to keep talking. Even if she likes you, she may not know what to say and it might take her brain a couple minutes to warm up to the situation.
If I can't think of anything situational to comment on, I just say, "Hey, I want you to meet me." Straightforward. Simple. Low pressure. Sets the frame that you're the prize. From there, just cold reads to get her talking about herself. Doesn't really matter what you say but just keep things positive and fun. The most important thing is how you feel about yourself.
If things go poorly just say, great meeting you, have an awesome night, smile and walk away & open the next set.
dustmuffin
Master Don Juan
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Ask the girl, do you know Ricard the frog. She says no. Then say would you like to meet him while holding out your hand.
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Don't drink so much next time, have a water between every drink so you're not so buzzed. Then just approach and say, hi my name is.... You'll know within a couple minutes whether she is curious or not. Don't complicate it.
RichardTheFrog
Banned
A couple minutes is a super long time for a conversation.
One time, I tried the 3 second rule, I ended up just standing there with nothing to say after 3 seconds.
If you introduce yourself and a woman completely blows you off that's one thing... but generally, women will entertain a conversation with you for a few minutes regardless. This is where you can gauge her initial interest level. Being buzzed or completely drunk will naturally lower your social skills, so that's why I suggest to taper the drinking while you're out.