"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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How to move from first date to girlfriend

Dam44

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I went on a date with this girl today and I think it went well.

She got there earlier than planned and it made me seem late. She started by complimenting my looks

It lasted about 2 hours. We talked and laughed. There was this and we seemed compatible. A bit of body contact and touches.

And I think I like her enough.

So what's the best way to turn her into a girlfriend? Go on another date?
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

BackInTheGame78

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I went on a date with this girl today and I think it went well.

She got there earlier than planned and it made me seem late. She started by complimenting my looks

It lasted about 2 hours. We talked and laughed. There was this and we seemed compatible. A bit of body contact and touches.

And I think I like her enough.

So what's the best way to turn her into a girlfriend? Go on another date?
You shouldn't be worrying about how to do this. That is HER job to worry about relationships. It's your job to create opportunities for spending time together, having fun and sex to happen.

Honestly the best thing you could do at this point is to set up a date with another woman before seeing her again. You seem like you have oneitis already.
 

derby1

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remember OP you must indirectly qualify women, and not just them qualify you. Your commitment should be a challenge, if you give it her within 4 meets it is worth nothing
 

Dam44

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You shouldn't be worrying about how to do this. That is HER job to worry about relationships. It's your job to create opportunities for spending time together, having fun and sex to happen.

Honestly the best thing you could do at this point is to set up a date with another woman before seeing her again. You seem like you have oneitis already.
Lol, I don't have oneitis at all. Thanks I'll go another date
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Dam44

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remember OP you must indirectly qualify women, and not just them qualify you. Your commitment should be a challenge, if you give it her within 4 meets it is worth nothing
I don't think I understand the bolded.

But I get it now, go on more dates
 

Black Widow Void

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Same advice as with your other post

"
Glad to read that things turned out well.

One word of advice: take things slow.

This being your first and all, there might be a tendency to daydream and overthink future expected outcomes. Actually, this is normal. The drawback is that things will usually not measure up to our expectations (sometimes it will exceed, but in the end, it usually leads to disappointment).

As to the advice of taking things slow... if you get caught up in a moment, you risk the problem of prematurely advancing things. It's a lot easier to gradually and eventually take a small step forward... than it is to impulsively take two steps forward ... and then attempt to take one step back. "
 

derby1

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I don't think I understand the bolded.
most men approach the dating scene like beggars, they dont even realise their doing it.

they are eternally grateful that some mediocre 5/10 gifted them with her time.

instead you must ask questions , passions, hobbies interests....did she get on with her dad etc etc...

you do this over a couple of months, her true colours wont show till then
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

Dam44

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most men approach the dating scene like beggars, they dont even realise their doing it.

they are eternally grateful that some mediocre 5/10 gifted them with her time.

instead you must ask questions , passions, hobbies interests....did she get on with her dad etc etc...

you do this over a couple of months, her true colours wont show till then
This makes so much sense, thanks
 

Dam44

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Noted!
Same advice as with your other post

"
Glad to read that things turned out well.

One word of advice: take things slow.

This being your first and all, there might be a tendency to daydream and overthink future expected outcomes. Actually, this is normal. The drawback is that things will usually not measure up to our expectations (sometimes it will exceed, but in the end, it usually leads to disappointment).

As to the advice of taking things slow... if you get caught up in a moment, you risk the problem of prematurely advancing things. It's a lot easier to gradually and eventually take a small step forward... than it is to impulsively take two steps forward ... and then attempt to take one step back. "
 

Dam44

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If you are already worrying about how to make a girl your girlfriend after 1 date this is the definition of oneitis.
If I didn't like her, I wouldn't have asked her at all. I'm quite sure it's not oneitis
 

Glassguy

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So what's the best way to turn her into a girlfriend?
Why would you want to do that?

What are you missing in your life?

*Someone asking where you are every hour
*Someone asking "who is she?"
*Someone griping at you when they have a bad day
*Not being able to go out with someone else that catches your eye?
*Lonely because you have no purpose that you are on in terms of career goals you are pressing to achieve?
*Lack of friends?
*A non existent abundance mindset because you arent approaching enough women and going on more dates?


Relax dude. It was one date. Keep it slow and simple in terms of "labels" and escalate sexually. After a few months let her come up with the relationship idea. If you are the one to orchestrate the "relationship", it will never end well.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Glassguy

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See her once or twice a week and go get busy the rest of the time doing something YOU like doing.
 

Rainman4707

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OP is excited because he got on well with with a woman, first date went well.

Advice is correct you have received.
Even though you think things went well, you have to be prepared in case she isnt interested. It can easily happen.

Its only a first date. Bad idea to be thinking like that after only ONE date.

She will try harder if she thinks she has competition.
 

Hamurabimbi

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Most of the time, I’ve found, women are pretty aggressive about being the GF. My previous GF, literally grabbed my phone & posted our relationship on social media. You’ll know when she wants to make it ‘official ‘.
 

Dam44

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Why would you want to do that?

What are you missing in your life?

*Someone asking where you are every hour
*Someone asking "who is she?"
*Someone griping at you when they have a bad day
*Not being able to go out with someone else that catches your eye?
*Lonely because you have no purpose that you are on in terms of career goals you are pressing to achieve?
*Lack of friends?
*A non existent abundance mindset because you arent approaching enough women and going on more dates?


Relax dude. It was one date. Keep it slow and simple in terms of "labels" and escalate sexually. After a few months let her come up with the relationship idea. If you are the one to orchestrate the "relationship", it will never end well.
See her once or twice a week and go get busy the rest of the time doing something YOU like doing.
This is good advice. Thanks
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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