"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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How to message, use Tinder and Bumble properly.

biggoal

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I don't use Tinder and Bumble except maybe one or twice a week just out of boredom so not a lot comes out of it. Anyway I did have a couple cute women like me on Tinder so I liked them back and sent them messages. One is 45 miles away but a solid 8 and the other one a 7. Anyway, I kept my message short just said I like what I read/saw and asked them if they want to text. Did I write too short of message? Should I do it like match.com messages I do and make them long messages with a lot of stuff in it or is bumble and Tinder supposed to be shorter messages?

What is the reply rate typically on Tinder and Bumble to when a person liked you first and you liked them back and wrote them a message?
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Young OG

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Your message sucks. I'm just being honest with you. Women get messages like that all the time on Tinder. I use a funny open ended question. I get a lot of replies to my opener even if it ends up going nowhere after that. You need to be unique and stand out more with your opener. You shouldn't ever be typing out long messages on OLD. Keep it short and simple.

You can't compare your reply rate with someone else's. Everyone is different. It depends on your pics and your opener.
 

biggoal

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Your message sucks. I'm just being honest with you. Women get messages like that all the time on Tinder. I use a funny open ended question. I get a lot of replies to my opener even if it ends up going nowhere after that. You need to be unique and stand out more with your opener. You shouldn't ever be typing out long messages on OLD. Keep it short and simple.

You can't compare your reply rate with someone else's. Everyone is different. It depends on your pics and your opener.
Why do they only allow a small number of pics to be uploaded? On those apps a lot of the women only have like 3 pics. At least the ones around here.
 

AttackFormation

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You match with a woman, so then you ask her if she wants to text.

Like YoungOG said I'm just gonna be honest, I can't decide yet whether you are a relatively skilled troll or just as stupid as your threads and posts here imply. And you are 35? God help you, whatever is the case.
 
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"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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biggoal

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Well I brushed my Tinder profile up today, changed my profile pic and spent a couple hours this afternoon tonight on it swipping. So far I got 5 likes/matches. Mostly HB7 on up. 4 of the 5 profiles look real and local too. Just had an HB7 23 yr old like me back and she replied to my message and chatting right now via the app. Lets see how this goes.
 

biggoal

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So since Im not that familiar with Tinder what are some nice first messages to send that are flirty but not over the top pervy and to sound friendly in general and get them interested?
 

AriMamba

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As a seasoned Tinder athlete I can give you few tips.

It doesn't really matter what you say. If the girls wanted to talk to you she will reply to hi or a 7 page memo.

Make sure your pictures are on point. Clear, and very well dressed. Make sure you're having fun somewhere exciting.

Women for some odd reason don't like to give phone out too quick but if you wait to long they might lose interest so somehow you have to gauge the conversation and ask when the time is right. Or sometimes they will just give it to you.

Try not to text immediately or every day. Trust me.
 

backseatjuan

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Actually I'm glad you made another online dating post.
Now I can see where you stand.... nowhere, you're struggling, you got no dates, those that you get are platonic.
Online dating does not bring you sex.
*
for the opener use none validating opener which requires her to look at your profile. This is true for all online dating services.
you seem interesting. Hi *wave*
Look up this video, Text Game --- From Number To Date Step By Step
 

biggoal

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As a seasoned Tinder athlete I can give you few tips.

It doesn't really matter what you say. If the girls wanted to talk to you she will reply to hi or a 7 page memo.

Make sure your pictures are on point. Clear, and very well dressed. Make sure you're having fun somewhere exciting.

Women for some odd reason don't like to give phone out too quick but if you wait to long they might lose interest so somehow you have to gauge the conversation and ask when the time is right. Or sometimes they will just give it to you.

Try not to text immediately or every day. Trust me.
Everyone says try getting the number quicker before they move on. Lately after a couple replies I ask for it and generally they give it to me. I just tell them I'm not on there a lot and I'd like to chat.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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