"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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How to kill the ego?

R

rhythmic

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Any thoughts on how to shrink one's ego?

Note that ego is separate from confidence - I'm seeing confidence as self-belief, and ego as the outward projection of that self-belief.

How to generally be more humble?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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B

BeDJ

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Your ego thrives on the need for validation.

Exercise 1:

Delete their number after the first date.
 
T

TillTheEndOfTime

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Whether you have an ego or not depends on your natural personality (i.e. genetics) and life experiences.

You can't "learn" how or how not to develop an ego.
 
SeymourCake

SeymourCake

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Look into zen meditation.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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F

floydb25

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BeginningDJ said:
Your ego thrives on the need for validation.
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...and is usually the result of insecurity and low self-esteem. Egotistical people tend to doubt their own abilities, and feel the need to prove to themselves and others that they're awesome and successful... Even if it's true, and they know it. They still need to remind everyone of this fact over and over. But then, when they fail, or people doubt or disbelieve their awesomeness, and they can't prove them otherwise, it hits them real hard... because it's all they have, and thrive for. They need constant validation and approval from others.

The ego can definitely work against you, and it's easy to slip into an "untouchable" mindset when enough praise is granted, and success is achieved... especially when it's all new to you.

Just don't care what others think, don't feel the need to prove anything or brag about your accomplishments, and don't let success get to your head - to where you think you're above the rest... 'cause they'll just knock your ass down.

Take every success and failure as it is... no big deal, and doesn't mean anything for the future. You could succeed thrice, then fail after. Doesn't mean ****; nothing is guaranteed. Take pride in your accomplishments, but don't dwell on them.

Being humble is pretty easy. Just be friendly and normal, and don't act like a conceited jackass, or think everything comes easy; it's no problem for you; you're better and more gifted than others, because you're so awesome.
 
Ronaldo7

Ronaldo7

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Being humble is accepting the fact that you are equal to everyone else. It's accepting that you are the same as the crowd and you don't stand out. Why be humble? If you are very good at something, you should say it, demonstrate it, and show it off. It's YOUR talent after all. People want you to be 'humble' so they won't feel bad about the fact that you are better than them. As long as you can back it up, you should continue to develop that 'untouchable' mindset. It sets you apart from everyone and filters out the useless people.
 
Z

zinc4

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Ronaldo7 said:
Being humble is accepting the fact that you are equal to everyone else. It's accepting that you are the same as the crowd and you don't stand out. Why be humble? If you are very good at something, you should say it, demonstrate it, and show it off. It's YOUR talent after all. People want you to be 'humble' so they won't feel bad about the fact that you are better than them. As long as you can back it up, you should continue to develop that 'untouchable' mindset. It sets you apart from everyone and filters out the useless people.
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Wrong.............only weak people need to show off their strengths...truly strong ones are the most humble you will ever meet.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Ronaldo7

Ronaldo7

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zinc4 said:
Wrong.............only weak people need to show off their strengths...truly strong ones are the most humble you will ever meet.
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I don't know which type of people you have met then. Maybe living in the Philippines impairs your judgement. It is a very different culture that you are experiencing compared to America. If you can do everything you say, you are truly untouchable. It's joined together with being superior. You can always choose to be humble to please other people and not make them feel bad or less. However, it is plausible that you can state how superior you are and show exactly that. What's wrong with saying you are going to do something and doing just that?
 
sharkbeat

sharkbeat

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Humiliate yourself consistently, by always trying new things.

I find that guys with thick egos are damn afraid of trying new things, because they know, they will get their cover blown, that they are not as cool as they think they are.
 
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