That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.
I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.
Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules. Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
I was the dumpee and she said she wanted to remain friends with me. I said that would take time and I'd rather we not talk for some time. So I NC'd her but I could tell she was sad about this judging by her updates on social medias. Then I reinitiated contact, thinking maybe there's a chance she might reconsider her decision. Also because I missed her. So here we are, 3 weeks later and we've been having great convos on text/IM every 2 days or so, with a bit of flirty remarks from both sides. I also notice good signs like she wouldn't sign off the messenger before I do, reviving dying convos, etc. One thing that I need to know is if she does this because she only craves for attention or actually because she still has feelings for me. Do you think it's ok if we have a talk or something? I mean, she's not a girl I just met or something. We have some history.DMEDFISIK said:Careful here. Girls live on attention and even if they want nothing to do with the attention giver. Who broke up with whom? If you were the dumpee, then don't initiate contact or ask for reconciliation. Let her be.
It's also possible that she thinks I've moved on after the NC and trying to save her pride by rarely contacting. And it's not like she NEVER initiates contact.Cheeks said:If she's not initiating contact, then she's the one who has moved on.
Fela Kuti said:I was the dumpee and she said she wanted to remain friends with me. I said that would take time and I'd rather we not talk for some time. So I NC'd her but I could tell she was sad about this judging by her updates on social medias. Then I reinitiated contact, thinking maybe there's a chance she might reconsider her decision. Also because I missed her. So here we are, 3 weeks later and we've been having great convos on text/IM every 2 days or so, with a bit of flirty remarks from both sides. I also notice good signs like she wouldn't sign off the messenger before I do, reviving dying convos, etc. One thing that I need to know is if she does this because she only craves for attention or actually because she still has feelings for me. Do you think it's ok if we have a talk or something? I mean, she's not a girl I just met or something. We have some history.
It's also possible that she thinks I've moved on after the NC and trying to protect her heart by not contacting.
The thing is, I don't see her as a girl who would initiate something like that. She has too much pride, I think. And considering that I had the last word when I told her I'd go NC to move on, isn't the ball in my court now?DMEDFISIK said:DON'T have a talk with her. She broke up with you, so let her fix it.
Secondly, it's safer to bet she's doing this for attention than anything else. Stay on limited contact, and don't be too available either. If a woman wants you, you'll know without a doubt, especially considering your circumstances.
Pretty great that you can still be friends with your ex. Very mature.Fela Kuti said:I was the dumpee and she said she wanted to remain friends with me. I said that would take time and I'd rather we not talk for some time. So I NC'd her but I could tell she was sad about this judging by her updates on social medias. Then I reinitiated contact, thinking maybe there's a chance she might reconsider her decision. Also because I missed her. So here we are, 3 weeks later and we've been having great convos on text/IM every 2 days or so, with a bit of flirty remarks from both sides. I also notice good signs like she wouldn't sign off the messenger before I do, reviving dying convos, etc. One thing that I need to know is if she does this because she only craves for attention or actually because she still has feelings for me. Do you think it's ok if we have a talk or something? I mean, she's not a girl I just met or something. We have some history.
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
Love != pride. Love and pride can't coexist in this situation. A woman with this much pride is dangerous, assuming she really wants you back. You shouldn't want to be with this kind of chick in the first place. Let her take care of her unresolved pride issues with another guy. I have an ex like this, and there's no way I would get back with her with this kind of pride issue.Fela Kuti said:The thing is, I don't see her as a girl who would initiate something like that. She has too much pride, I think. And considering that I had the last word when I told her I'd go NC to move on, isn't the ball in my court now?
Yeah, I'll try not contacting her for a while and see if she reciprocates.DMEDFISIK said:Love != pride. Love and pride can't coexist in this situation. A woman with this much pride is dangerous, assuming she really wants you back. You shouldn't want to be with this kind of chick in the first place. Let her take care of her unresolved pride issues with another guy. I have an ex like this, and there's no way I would get back with her with this kind of pride issue.
Nah, it's not like I'm trying to be her friend or anything. I'm only doing this just because I sense she might be interested in getting back together.AlexDP said:Pretty great that you can still be friends with your ex. Very mature.
Oh wait.
You're now her friend. Don't you see this?Fela Kuti said:Nah, it's not like I'm trying to be her friend or anything. I'm only doing this just because I sense she might be interested in getting back together.
yes, probably. in the loose sense of the word. friends don't flirt do they? but I realize this can't continue if I still want her back.AlexDP said:You're now her friend. Don't you see this?