How to avoid becoming an emotional tampon?

[weakepedea]

How do you prevent this w/o being seen as a jerk?

 

[Existential]

You set the parameters of the relationship from the beginning. It's not that you don't care about her feelings, it's that your worldview is that you are not a counselor. Do you care about her? Yes. Are you being paid an hourly wage to counsel? No. MAKE HER 100% ACCOUNTABLE FOR THE SITUATION SHE IS CURRENTLY SAD ABOUT. Don't do is crudely, and don't do it as, "well, you'd be better off with me." Your frame should be, "Well, what did you expect?" Similar to as if you were explaing, "two plus two."

Now, obviously, if you girlfriend youself at the beginning and then LATER try to withdrawal she's going to see it as jerk like behavior. Nonetheless, this slow leveraging of value is one of the best ways to get OUT of the friend zone in the first place.

 

[DonGorgon]

eh ... if i am getting what i want then I pretend to care but if not then i dont.

 

[everywomanshero]

I don't know man my thing is I just set precidents and over time the chicks do what I want them to do. To be honest I am kind of surprised it has worked so consistently. Logically you'd think the chicks would become more demanding over time but instead I've found they tend to fall in line with what I want to happen. I don't yell at them or act like a jerk either. I set precidents which over time dictate how the relationship works from her paying more than half the time to going to the place I want to eat it. I still do what they prefer sometimes though.

The biggest thing I have found is to keep giving them sex. If I cut the sex off that's when all the *****ing starts.

 

[JackPrescott]

You set the parameters of the relationship from the beginning. It's not that you don't care about her feelings, it's that your worldview is that you are not a counselor. Do you care about her? Yes. Are you being paid an hourly wage to counsel? No. MAKE HER 100% ACCOUNTABLE FOR THE SITUATION SHE IS CURRENTLY SAD ABOUT. Don't do is crudely, and don't do it as, "well, you'd be better off with me." Your frame should be, "Well, what did you expect?" Similar to as if you were explaing, "two plus two."

Now, obviously, if you girlfriend youself at the beginning and then LATER try to withdrawal she's going to see it as jerk like behavior. Nonetheless, this slow leveraging of value is one of the best ways to get OUT of the friend zone in the first place.

I usually, and rudely, cut them off, and start insulting the fu*ck out of the male in question, bringing up such issues as penis size, and manhood, and his ability to streetfight, and then slandering her for being stupid enough to fall for his lines, when he was not as good in the sack as myself. Then I offer myself as a sexual release, for healing purposes. If she refuses, I hang up, or leave her at the restaurant/bar, with the tab.

 

[Existential]

I usually, and rudely, cut them off, and start insulting the fu*ck out of the male in question, bringing up such issues as penis size, and manhood, and his ability to streetfight, and then slandering her for being stupid enough to fall for his lines, when he was not as good in the sack as myself. Then I offer myself as a sexual release, for healing purposes. If she refuses, I hang up, or leave her at the restaurant/bar, with the tab.

Haha, I wouldn't handle it that way and I don't think it's exactly optimal in a theoretical sense. But, if it gets you results, more power to you. Lol.

 

[PrinceBeavis]

I usually, and rudely, cut them off, and start insulting the fu*ck out of the male in question, bringing up such issues as penis size, and manhood, and his ability to streetfight, and then slandering her for being stupid enough to fall for his lines, when he was not as good in the sack as myself. Then I offer myself as a sexual release, for healing purposes. If she refuses, I hang up, or leave her at the restaurant/bar, with the tab.

Yeah, I wouldn't do that either.

 

[JackPrescott]

Yeah, I wouldn't do that either.

What would you do, stay up till 4am listening to her sob over what an a$$hole he is, because he had anal sex with her younger sister?

 

[Christopher Philip]

I usually, and rudely, cut them off, and start insulting the fu*ck out of the male in question, bringing up such issues as penis size, and manhood, and his ability to streetfight, and then slandering her for being stupid enough to fall for his lines, when he was not as good in the sack as myself. Then I offer myself as a sexual release, for healing purposes. If she refuses, I hang up, or leave her at the restaurant/bar, with the tab.

lol that's aggressive but not totally bad advice. People forget how messed up women can be too. Sometimes you have bring yourself above and that means cutting ties with messed up girls.

 

[Birdem]

Set the rules early at the very beginning. If you start to hear her talking about her bull**** problems on the first date I would just forget about a second date because she got problems that are beyond you. Another option I would use would like cut her off and say you have to go, she will get the point that you aren't there to be her girlfriend. Jack that would be nice advice if you want someone to be insecure.

 

[JackPrescott]

Set the rules early at the very beginning. If you start to hear her talking about her bull**** problems on the first date I would just forget about a second date because she got problems that are beyond you. Another option I would use would like cut her off and say you have to go, she will get the point that you aren't there to be her girlfriend. Jack that would be nice advice if you want someone to be insecure.

If she doesnt want to go to bed with me, I could care less if she is insecure.