"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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How should I chat/converse in a group with females?

Stephen89

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So something amazing and totally unexpected happened.

I go to events, I play sports matches between communities for years and they've seen me for a long time, I may have said 'hi' to them only once lol. I only have 2 of them on Facebook. I don't really chat to them.

They've created a chat group on Facebook similar to a whats-app group which they invited me to join the group) amongst their female cousins, female friends in the community, I'm assuming they'll add more females since they know more females in the community and so far I'm the only male member out of all of them.

I'll see them in the events.

It's really my ticket in.

So this is the Facebook messages so far from one of the females:

-what's app group was a bit too much, let's have a laugh and do things! If anyone has idea's let's do stuff!

On another message:

-Beverage anonymous meetings

So what are your tips and tactics? I sometimes don't know what to say.

The messages could be lighthearted and jokey.
 
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"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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oldmanofthesea

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Talk to them like the normal people they are. If there is a girl in the group you find attractive, work your game on her IN-PERSON only. Consider any awkwardness it might create if she rejects you, considering you may see her all the time at the sporting events. In group texts, communicate much less than the women do - you are a busy guy and not a single loser who has time to sit around texting constantly - your texts should be a little funny, where possible, and to the point regarding coordination of activities. Save the long joking conversations for the actual F2F events.
 

speed dawg

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I'd stay off the chat as much as possible. Use it for information only. If someone addresses you specifically, wait a few hours and give a short response.

You really don't want to get in the habit of small talk with a group of females, you risk becoming one of them (in their eyes).
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Stephen89

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I'd stay off the chat as much as possible. Use it for information only. If someone addresses you specifically, wait a few hours and give a short response.

You really don't want to get in the habit of small talk with a group of females, you risk becoming one of them (in their eyes).
Thanks for the suggestion speed dawg.
 

mrgoodstuff

Master Don Juan
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I'd stay off the chat as much as possible. Use it for information only. If someone addresses you specifically, wait a few hours and give a short response.

You really don't want to get in the habit of small talk with a group of females, you risk becoming one of them (in their eyes).
Agree.
 
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