Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

Read more...

How much does nervousness matter do you guys think?

IamtheAlphamale

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 14, 2003
Messages
569
Reaction score
102
How much do you guys think showing any nervousness matters when asking a girl out? Lets say shes a 10 but very interested. Lets say you just sound a bit nervous.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

confidentguy

New Member
Joined
Feb 9, 2007
Messages
7
Reaction score
0
if youre a bit nervous and she likes you, you might get away with it, if youre very nervous its probably a turn off.
 

frisco

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 21, 2005
Messages
254
Reaction score
1
If you show constant nervousness, then the girl will become uncomfortable and leave but if you show your slightly nervous but overcome it quickly then its nothing you cant recover from.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

KJB

Don Juan
Joined
Apr 3, 2006
Messages
17
Reaction score
0
Nervousness can be a really big deal. Self confidence, as has been mentioned over and over again, is key. Nervousness shows a lack of self confidence, it can totally screw you.
Someone mentioned a little nervousness is okay if you show you overcome it, I agree with that from experience. No matter what I do I always show a little bit of it when I first meet a really HB. If you come into your own though and relax you can beat it.
But still, its one of those things you should try to kill.
 

Thomas94305

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 19, 2005
Messages
324
Reaction score
2
Location
California
A different slant.... Don't become really nervous over being a little nervous (huh?). Sometimes we'll approach a sarge, say something "wrong", get too nervous and eject. I've noticed that when I say the wrong thing, and experience the associated nervousness.. but then just let it pass like a normal occurance, I can regain my frame quite well, and continue the sarge.

If you're just "slightly" nervous, it's no big deal. She may not even notice it. Being around her a little will help that nervousness to pass. We've all seen this, it's the initial approach anxiety. We have that little bit of nervousness, and it passes, and the conversation, etc go FINE.

However, extreme nervousness can queer the deal. Would depend on the individual.. That's one of the problems with these DJ rules, there's no rules, only guidelines. If you keep your voice steady, keep good posture, don't sweat or be fidgity, I'd say YOUR FINE.

In any event, what you need to do here is the same. If you're not that nervous, approach, continue it. If you are nervous.. approach, continue it, that will help you get comfortable around women. So.. either way.. approach.
 

Zwitterion

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 27, 2006
Messages
75
Reaction score
0
why don't you go find this out for yourself instead of getting subjective responses
 

NFC

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 2, 2006
Messages
148
Reaction score
0
It depends on the girl.. and a number of variables. Some girls think it's cute.. some girls find it as a weakness and lack of confidence.. some girls don't really care because you meet the physical standards.. for some girls it might make or break you.

Just approach a lot.. sooner or later it wont become as scary and there will be no nervousness.
 

Mind_Body_Soul

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Mar 30, 2004
Messages
281
Reaction score
1
Age
45
Location
A-Town PA USA
Yeah a little bit of nervousness can actually be a good thing - I try to reframe it and tell myself I'm just excited. I think that's from David DeAngelo.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

Top