"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

How many women would you like to date before settling into a LTR?

The_Reaper

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 22, 2006
Messages
284
Reaction score
1
Location
Europe
I am going to assume that most of the members here are planning to eventually find a quality woman and settle down with her. My question is, how many women would you ideally like to date before this? And also, my definition of date is not "meet for coffee a few times, end it a week later", I'm talking more long term, at least a couple of months.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

Francisco d'Anconia

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 10, 2003
Messages
15,481
Reaction score
65
Location
Galt's Gulch
Are you asking how many we'd like to lay before we settle down?
 

The_Reaper

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 22, 2006
Messages
284
Reaction score
1
Location
Europe
Francisco d'Anconia said:
Are you asking how many we'd like to lay before we settle down?
Why sir, yes I am. But this doesn't include one-night stands, only semi-LTRs or LTRS.
 

On Point

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 24, 2007
Messages
140
Reaction score
2
I think having a number like you suggest would be kind of rediculous. If I met a women well suited to myself tonight, would I sacrifice having a relationship with her because I'm on 11 instead of 12?

Forget about rules, know what you want and how to get it when you have the opportunity.

The_Reaper said:
I am going to assume that most of the members here are planning to eventually find a quality woman and settle down with her. My question is, how many women would you ideally like to date before this? And also, my definition of date is not "meet for coffee a few times, end it a week later", I'm talking more long term, at least a couple of months.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 10, 2003
Messages
15,481
Reaction score
65
Location
Galt's Gulch
The_Reaper said:
Why sir, yes I am. But this doesn't include one-night stands, only semi-LTRs or LTRS.
Alright, now I'm intrigued. Why not include ONS? Does this have something to do with bedding women we somewhat care for but not care enough to commit to?
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

speakeasy

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 4, 2006
Messages
2,776
Reaction score
77
I ask myself that all the time. I don't know. I guess as many as it takes.
 

belividere

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 6, 2005
Messages
956
Reaction score
5
Age
47
As somewhat of a serial monogamist I can say that a LTR does not equal marriage. Nor does a marriage equal lifetime (dont have experience in that category yet though).

Having been in 4 LTRs (8 months +, and 3 having been 18 months +) I can say that the real person doesn't come out for the first month. The next month is the one where you can learn more and get to know whether you want to be with her or not. The third month is typically the one were you break up. Dont bother being serious until you've gotten past this third month, and even then another 9 months of dating can make you realize your in a bad spot.

Every girl gives you a chance to learn and that is what is important. If you're 21 and haven't meet a girl worth dating for 3 months you should consider looking to meet girls in different venues.
 

penkitten

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 14, 2001
Messages
8,255
Reaction score
235
Age
49
Location
at our house
dude, i think you are going about this all wrong.
no member on this board is going to come up with the same number and even if they did ....
how can you plan out life like that?

lets say your goal is date 10 women before you settle down with any for a ltr...

#1 acts like she likes you for two weeks and then says she is just your friend
#2 goes out with you but you don't find much chemistry there
#3 starts seeing you but before anything comes out of it, she takes her ex back
#4 goes out on one date with you and you find her to be too loud, too b*tchy and complainy
#5 is out on a date with you but you run into some of her buddies and they hang out with you all night, you find out she is not what you are looking for
#6 drank like a fish that night and slept with you that first night too
as great as that might sound, it leaves a bitter aftertaste the next day when you are wondering if she is always slu*ty like that
#7 turns out to be a workaholic
#8 turns out to have children
#9 you hit it off with and you really adore her. great person. but you can't settle down because you owe yourself one more for your "list"
#10 turns out to be a b*tch
so then you think now i can find one to settle down with
#11 plays head games
#12 is money hungry
#13 takes medication
#14 turns out to be a horrible lay

see... it makes completely no sense to play out to the number.

so i advise you to just go with your gut. if your gut says #9 is worth a shot at ltr... then do what you think and feel is right.

life, dating, it's all an experiment.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

Charm

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 18, 2003
Messages
1,268
Reaction score
11
Age
43
8.

Now turn that 8 on its side.
 
Top