"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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How many women would you like to date before settling into a LTR?

The_Reaper

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I am going to assume that most of the members here are planning to eventually find a quality woman and settle down with her. My question is, how many women would you ideally like to date before this? And also, my definition of date is not "meet for coffee a few times, end it a week later", I'm talking more long term, at least a couple of months.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Francisco d'Anconia

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Are you asking how many we'd like to lay before we settle down?
 

The_Reaper

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Francisco d'Anconia said:
Are you asking how many we'd like to lay before we settle down?
Why sir, yes I am. But this doesn't include one-night stands, only semi-LTRs or LTRS.
 

On Point

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I think having a number like you suggest would be kind of rediculous. If I met a women well suited to myself tonight, would I sacrifice having a relationship with her because I'm on 11 instead of 12?

Forget about rules, know what you want and how to get it when you have the opportunity.

The_Reaper said:
I am going to assume that most of the members here are planning to eventually find a quality woman and settle down with her. My question is, how many women would you ideally like to date before this? And also, my definition of date is not "meet for coffee a few times, end it a week later", I'm talking more long term, at least a couple of months.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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The_Reaper said:
Why sir, yes I am. But this doesn't include one-night stands, only semi-LTRs or LTRS.
Alright, now I'm intrigued. Why not include ONS? Does this have something to do with bedding women we somewhat care for but not care enough to commit to?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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speakeasy

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I ask myself that all the time. I don't know. I guess as many as it takes.
 

belividere

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As somewhat of a serial monogamist I can say that a LTR does not equal marriage. Nor does a marriage equal lifetime (dont have experience in that category yet though).

Having been in 4 LTRs (8 months +, and 3 having been 18 months +) I can say that the real person doesn't come out for the first month. The next month is the one where you can learn more and get to know whether you want to be with her or not. The third month is typically the one were you break up. Dont bother being serious until you've gotten past this third month, and even then another 9 months of dating can make you realize your in a bad spot.

Every girl gives you a chance to learn and that is what is important. If you're 21 and haven't meet a girl worth dating for 3 months you should consider looking to meet girls in different venues.
 

penkitten

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dude, i think you are going about this all wrong.
no member on this board is going to come up with the same number and even if they did ....
how can you plan out life like that?

lets say your goal is date 10 women before you settle down with any for a ltr...

#1 acts like she likes you for two weeks and then says she is just your friend
#2 goes out with you but you don't find much chemistry there
#3 starts seeing you but before anything comes out of it, she takes her ex back
#4 goes out on one date with you and you find her to be too loud, too b*tchy and complainy
#5 is out on a date with you but you run into some of her buddies and they hang out with you all night, you find out she is not what you are looking for
#6 drank like a fish that night and slept with you that first night too
as great as that might sound, it leaves a bitter aftertaste the next day when you are wondering if she is always slu*ty like that
#7 turns out to be a workaholic
#8 turns out to have children
#9 you hit it off with and you really adore her. great person. but you can't settle down because you owe yourself one more for your "list"
#10 turns out to be a b*tch
so then you think now i can find one to settle down with
#11 plays head games
#12 is money hungry
#13 takes medication
#14 turns out to be a horrible lay

see... it makes completely no sense to play out to the number.

so i advise you to just go with your gut. if your gut says #9 is worth a shot at ltr... then do what you think and feel is right.

life, dating, it's all an experiment.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Charm

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8.

Now turn that 8 on its side.
 
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