I'm 6'4", 235 and one of the fittest guys at my gym and have an 8" penis and I struggle in the dating market. If that gets rejected or deemed not good enough what does that say about the broader market as a whole?
Those are the stats of a top tier man that is most desired by women. It would be difficult for any random forum participant to figure out why a guy with those stats is struggling in the dating market.
he literally dedicated his lifestyle to game/picking up women, which he did by going out on a weekly basis. Most guys don't even have the time or energy for something like this if you have things like a career or other hobbies in your life. Some guys also might not be into nightlife or spam approaching in environments like this. Not only do you have to physically go out of your way to attend these places, but you'd also have to be willing to go through potentially a ton of bull****, rejection, etc. In addition to this, it would also potentially be an expensive endeavor, most places in a good sized metro will have cover charges and you are most likely going to buy yourself or maybe a woman a drink, it would add up quickly. @RazorRambo24
literally put a ton of work into attaining this high of a body count and invested a ton of time, energy and money into this, which is not something most men would be willing to do. Some other guys may prefer to dedicate this spare time towards a money making side hustle, investing or maybe just enjoying other hobbies instead. This is not at all something most men would ever do, nothing wrong with it at all but I sure as hell wouldn't be willing or able to.
Going out on a weekly basis means once a week, and that's not dedicating a life to it.
Dedicating a life to picking up women would involve either dates or new approaches at least 5-6 days a week. There have been phases of my life where I did that. It's exhausting for sure but what other better things could I have done? I needed vagina. Daygame can be inexpensive but it's an effort to linger in a mall or bookstore for hours even though it's free. Same with the parks or on a path.
Other opportunities that create abundance are OLD sites or apps, but these overall have a very low success rate for the majority of men. Very often you may be chatting with them but it doesn't lead to a meetup. You may even meetup for a first date but then nothing happens or you aren't even into her. Basically, to be able to rack up a high notch count from OLD requires a ton of time and energy invested into something with a low rate of return over a very long period of time. Again, this may be something that most men are not willing to go through, I'm one of them.
At various times in my life, I dedicated a ton of time to either dating websites (pre-swipe app era) or dating swipe apps. I did not have good experiences with either. Dating websites and swipe apps are a time suck for most men. It was my experience with them that it would be possible to arrange more dates with either form as compared to just approaching women in real life but the majority of the dates would be complete garbage. It is a better use of time to do the in-person approaches, get the real world experience with them right away, go on fewer dates but have better quality dates. One bad outcome many men experience with online dating is the "one date, no sex, no second date" type interaction. It's best to avoid these. They are a waste of time, money, and effort. Sometimes, a woman is so bad on a date that you as the man will want to cut it short. However, in most cases, you as a man will be wanting more and she cuts it short. Too many of the situations described in the last sentence will be psychologically harmful.
There are a few ways to reduce "one date, no sex, no second date" type interactions. Some men swear by screening very hard on the swipe apps, but I haven't found that as effective as solely arranging dates through in-person methods.
Your metro area also plays a big role in this as well, some places are better than others and some are worse. This ties in directly with the dating market of your current area, if it sucks does that mean you should pack up and leave? What's to say the next area you go to is actually better? Also, most guys live where they are for a reason, whether that be comfort, a good job, etc. Does it really make sense to pack up everything and go to a different metro because the dating market in your current area sucks?
I agree that metro areas are a relevant consideration.
If you're 25+ and find yourself unattached, an area with a population of less than 100,000 - 150,000 is likely not going to work. In a smaller area, there's a need to pair off early, with a high school girlfriend or a girlfriend from a small town college. Outside of that, those areas become very difficult due to lack of choices. Every metro under 150,000 is different. If you're 25+ and in a less populated area, there's a good chance you will need to move to a bigger city to improve your romantic life.
Moving from one area of 500,000+ to another area of 500,000+ is less likely to make a difference in one dating life. Once a population of an area gets into the hundreds of thousands, there are likely to be enough options. There are situations when certain populated metro areas are bad fits for a variety of reasons for certain people. I've seen it happen before. In those cases, moving can be justified.
Frequent relocations weaken social circles, and social circle is the easiest way to find "a girlfriend". Pay close attention to the words "a girlfriend". That means one girlfriend. If you're looking for an extended relationship (2-5 years or more), your best bet for getting that with the least amount of grief and frustration is social circle. Many men who get social circle girlfriends tend to retain those girlfriends for a long time and often beyond the useful life of the relationship. A lot of the social circle girlfriend guys are beta males and beta males operate from a scarcity mindset. It's common to see a 10 year relationship (and counting) relationship from social circle which does lead to a marriage proposal.
The problem with social circles becomes sustainability over a longer period of time (5+ years). Social circles have a way of getting pissed off at men who continually exchange girlfriends without marriage or babies, even if the relationships are semi-long (1-4 years). After 2 or so instances of medium term relationships, the social circle will run dry.
When a man relocates frequently, it means that he will likely have issues with having social circles and will need to be reliant upon either approaching strangers, using swipe apps, or using the DMs on social media platforms. All of those paths are more difficult paths in the short to medium term.
When we factor out the two avenues of playing a numbers game, OLD and nightlife, you are really only left with random chance encounters in the real world. How often are men going to cross paths with a woman who they find attractive, who also is open to them AND single/available at that given period of time? Again, unless you are in situations like this regularly, most men aren't, the numbers are not in your favor. This is why after a certain age many men find the dating world a struggle.
Wheat Waffles' dating flowchart is relevant here.
What you describe your quote is why approaching strangers can be very time consuming. Outside of having a pre-made social circle from not relocating much over the course of your lifetime, whichever game method you choose will often be time consuming, unless you're a Top 10% man (90th - 99th percentile). Men in the 80th - 89th percentile will still do pretty well, but have increasing amount of nonsense as a part of their effort. Below the 80th percentile means that it will be a big effort.
I've experienced what you've described in my efforts of doing non-bar approaching.