"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

Read more...

how long should I wait before asking her out

CFERD

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 16, 2008
Messages
94
Reaction score
2
Now that I'm getting back into dating after the last trainwreck, I could use a little advice. There's a cute woman who lives near the site where I'm temorarily working. I started chatting her up a few weeks ago when she walks by. Rather than looking for IOI's and over analysizing her behavior I'm going with my gut and plan on asking her out sometime. I don't know if she is in fact an AW or if the vibe I'm getting is legit. I figure there is only one way to find out, asking for her number when I see her just about everday seems kind of silly. So far I've been making it a point of running into her a few days in a row and avoiding her for a day or two. Anyhow, it's obvious there is some flirting going on but I'm wondering if asking too soon would be a bad move, I already know waiting too long will not reap good results, I don't want to be the nice guy that only chats with her when she walks by, but shows no balls beyond that. Knowing the worst thing that could happen is she says no, doesn't bother me, I'm more interested in getting a yes. In fact I am picturing a yes in my mind, just asking what anyone else thinks is the better way to play it....thanks
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

The Comeback Kid

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 4, 2005
Messages
591
Reaction score
5
I say ask her out the first (good) chance you get! :up:

Over the past few months, my philosophy has changed. I USED to try and figure out, "Does she like me, does she not like me," etc. before asking her out, and that never worked. I'd overthink it too much and it's all time wasted when she turned me down.

NOW, I shoot from the hip, for better of for worse. If I get a good vibe and it seems realistic, I go for it ASAP. If she says yes, congrats! If she says no, you didn't waste much time and now you can move on to other girls.
 
Top