"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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How long is your first date usually?

ilikeburritos

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I'm gonna be taking this girl to a bar for a few drinks tomorrow night. Is there a general minimum or maximum time I want to limit myself to? I couldn't imagine staying longer than an hour, that seems way too long...even if conversation is still flowing. What amount of time do you generally try to shoot for before walking her home or bringing her back to your place?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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wjh

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1 to 2 hours MAX for me - ASSUMING things are great and she's interesting.

At a bar, after a few drinks, and depending on whether or not I will be F-Closing, an hour is fine.

There are a lot of factors, rapport for example, and whether or not it's been established through some other interaction prior to the first date.
 
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My last date was almost 2 hours over 2 drinks and I kiss closed, and she has agreed to meet me again this weekend. The 2 hours felt like 30 minutes and I think that's a great sign.

I think I could have F-Closed if we lived close to each other.
 

DonJuan11

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ilikeburritos said:
I'm gonna be taking this girl to a bar for a few drinks tomorrow night. Is there a general minimum or maximum time I want to limit myself to? I couldn't imagine staying longer than an hour, that seems way too long...even if conversation is still flowing. What amount of time do you generally try to shoot for before walking her home or bringing her back to your place?
Don't stay longer than 93 minutes.
 

ilikeburritos

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Don't stay longer than 93 minutes.
are you sure? I usually hear 89 minutes max but just wanted to check

PS it doesn't even matter as I just found out I was given a decoy phone number
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Effington

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ilikeburritos said:
are you sure? I usually hear 89 minutes max but just wanted to check

PS it doesn't even matter as I just found out I was given a decoy phone number
I have found that 94.5 minutes is actually the key. Book it.
 

theunflushables

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You got to be careful with bars though. I met a "friend", and I say "friend" because thats what she is, but there is more to our relationship, we just cant act upon that because of the situation she is in. Anyways, I asked if she wanted to grab a drink to make her night at work a little more bearable. And I meant a drink. It ended up being 3 each and split fish and chips. She paid though so all is good. :D
 
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