"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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How do you start spinning plates

Ringleader41

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I'm a total noob at the dating game. To find one girl is a miracle for me.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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sighsigh

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The first step is to actually get into regular contact with girls (which is a very difficult step for some). Then you can worry about picking them up (use the DJ bible for that).

For some people the most obvious way to do this is to go to bars and nightclubs.

You might also try joining a ton of extracurriculars (charity groups, casual sports teams, and so on) at your university or city.
 

Iceberg

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San Jose California said:
You can tell iceberg to go fuck himself, ringleader, it's ok. No one should be telling you to read a 400 page book as a response to your easy ass question.
San Juan, I thought we were friends.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

Sofomore

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San Jose California said:
^wow what a witty response... for a 12 year old.
Chill the fvck out. The OP is a noob. He needs to start from ground zero aka THE DJ BIBLE. This isn't an "easy a$$ question".
 

Iceberg

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San Jose California said:
Maybe you have other posts that I like, but I just hate when someone says in response to someone's question "oh I got what you need, here's the DJ bible, *link*". Because how would you like it if someone told you to read a 400 page book as an answer to a question that could be answered in a minute.
"How do I spin plates?"

It's not a question that can be answered in a minute. It's the result of dedication to a lifestyle of self improvement.

Work on yourself. Get confidence. Get social. Get a girl...then realize that she's just a girl...so go get more girls too. Basically this is just a crappy summary of what the DJ Bible does a great job of explaining.

What do you think is the quick, 1-minute answer that tells a guy how to grow confidence, become social, and successfully maintain several relationships with women at the same time?
 

Nutz

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Step 1: lower your standards a bit

Step 2: cast a wide net -- approach a ton and troll the online dating sites

Step 3: when you're getting laid regularly, you'll notice a perception shift in how women respond to you

Step 4: start ratcheting up the standards a bit and sub in hotter women for the women that cycle out of your soft harem
 

DonJuanabe

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Honestly I don't know how most of you have time to spin plates. I'm too busy with sh*t for that. I suppose my game suffers as a result.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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JCballin88

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I don't think starting with the DJ Bible is a bad idea at all...it's not like the guy's gonna instantly jump away from his computer and into the downtown nightclub because one poster convinced him.

The OP is probably like a lot of the readers on here...lonely guys who spend most of their free time sitting in their room wishing they could solve a problem that seems impossibly overwhelming that they don't know where to start.

So that's why you just shift him from reading message boards all day to a book that actually lays the groundwork for what all of us are striving for but most of us don't actually have.

I like the DJ Bible, but I really favor the Book of Pook. I just put it on my Kindle too, so I can read it on the go. Even if the guy reads nothing more than Pook's "15 lessons" it can do wonders for getting him in the right frame of mind to take a more strategic approach to his whole situation.
 

J Roc

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You cant become a DJ without the proper foundation. read the DJ bible and come back with more specific questions...
 

J Roc

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DonJuanabe said:
Honestly I don't know how most of you have time to spin plates. I'm too busy with sh*t for that. I suppose my game suffers as a result.
Unless you are studying for a PHD you cant be too busy to spin plates or juggle bootycalls...
 
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