"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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How do you respond to a date offer being turned down

pdx1138

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Exoduso said:
Then what's the point of saying she'll make it up, then text me a few hours later saying "hi cutie" and attempting to reinitiate contact the same day?
Because its FUN to string guys along for the attention/control factor, making you jump through hoops like a trained circus animal.
Once I became aware of these AttentionWhoaring games, I implemented a 2 strike rule for such behavior. Fool me once....etc.
Anything more...(for me) is a waste of time.

Regardless, make HER work for it like bigneil said.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Exoduso

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So she did contact a 2nd time tonight... a couple of flirty texts back and forth but nothing concrete about making plans. So now what, am I supposed to ask her out AGAIN this week? I guess it's possible, and if she declines again then I can just move on...

Or, do I say anything about her saying she'll make it up?
 

GhengisKhan

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I have to say, I am frequently surprised by the amount of times I see advice to "next" a woman based upon her inability to make a date. There are women who are legitimately busy, and quite a lot of them: college students, career women, single mothers... my advice is to learn some body language that indicates deception: if she's telling you a lie as an excuse, by all means, next immediately. If she's legitimately busy, that's no reason to dismiss her, unless of course you want to fool around with a boring woman with too much time on her hands (which you may quickly regret).
 

Zarky

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I "next" busy women simply because I forget about them. I get involved with other chicks and the one who was too busy to get together until 2 weeks from Sunday gets lost in the shuffle.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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jodel41

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i had a situation in which i asked a girl out on a date and she said she was gonna be busy that day so i gave a counter offer for the next day..she has still not replied me...what do i do next?
 

Yewki

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i had a situation in which i asked a girl out on a date and she said she was gonna be busy that day so i gave a counter offer for the next day..she has still not replied me...what do i do next?
Go do other things and forget about her. If she ever responds cool... if not, oh well.
 

jodel41

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if she turns me down again..how long should it take for to ask her out again or i should just forget about her totally?
 

Yewki

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if she turns me down again..how long should it take for to ask her out again or i should just forget about her totally?
The ball is in her court, so let her play ball. If she ignores/rejects your counter, game over.
 

marmel75

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You leave it up to her. Say something like "Well, you seem to have a lot on your plate right now, so I won't add to it. Get back to me if you wanted to meet up some time and I'll see if I'm available."

Simple, to the point, let's her know you aren't playing games with her, you are not going to chase her and you have other options(even if you don't).

That's the hardest part for most guys to realize. Even if you don't have other options at the time, you have to act as if you do.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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jodel41

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what if she rejects my counter offer and i just reply with 'okay' and move on or do i give her a third chance?
 

nismo-4

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This thread is old, but if she rejects your date offer, and doesn't counteroffer, just move on. It's a lack of interest.

Only give your time and attention to women interested in you. If you had a date with a Victoria's secret angel, you'd make it happen, barring a family emergency.
 
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