"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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how do you present/project/image?

H

Heretolearn

Master Don Juan
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Hey guys,

Was thinking about how you present/project/your image and energy you send out to others.

Someone commented that I have a big barrier around me lol. What do you guys think you do/have?

What can I do to improve my approachability :)
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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J

jophil28

Master Don Juan
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Heretolearn said:
Someone commented that I have a big barrier around me lol. What do you guys think you do/have?


:)
Click to expand...
Was the commentator a woman ?
 
H

Heretolearn

Master Don Juan
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often get the you seem so stand offish and serious but nice and funny once you get to know me lol
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

J

jophil28

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 18, 2006
Messages
5,216
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Location
Gold Coast. Aust.
Heretolearn said:
Yes a couple of ladies independently of each other lol.
Click to expand...
Their comment is one of those "nudges" that woman say for 'who knows whatever' reason.. Much like "are you gay" or "you look aloof" ...
Women open their mouth and words just fall out - do not alter yourself in any way just because some random women sprouted some mildly provocative stuff.

What other people think of you has little to do with you.

Chuck it over your shoulder and move on.
 
S

slaog

Master Don Juan
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an island
Heretolearn said:
Hey guys,

Was thinking about how you present/project/your image and energy you send out to others.

Someone commented that I have a big barrier around me lol. What do you guys think you do/have?

What can I do to improve my approachability :)
Click to expand...
Barrier = closed body language. Arms crossed etc and not making eye contact. Do you feel uncomfortable around people?


I've 2 tips:
1- (short term)Try improving your body language. This can be done quickly and make you seem more friendly and approachable.
2- (long term)Develop a DJ mindset. Think yourself as the prize etc.
 
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