"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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How do I go about asking for and getting a kiss on the first date?

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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SirBigBell

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“Hey Jessica, ive thoroughly enjoyed your company and getting to know you better. There is a little present Ive been holding back all evening and i want it to be a nice little surprise. Close your eyes and dont peek”

Proceed to give her a solid kiss.
Job done
 

Mister_Skinny_Jeanz

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don't kiss her man , you don't know where her mouth has been!
hank moody can you please drop that vid where the xfiles dude gamed the fvck out of meagan good
 

SirBigBell

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Smooth. Adding this to my arsenal. When she asks where I got this, I'm gonna say "Sir Big Bell, babygirl."
Hahaha cheers Hank.
Ive been using it for 20years and its never failed. Getting her to close her eyes builds her anticipation and removes the awkwardness. It also gives you precious seconds to get yourself in the proper frame for a winning kiss while the suspense bubbles up nicely.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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firstbornunicorn

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“Hey Jessica, ive thoroughly enjoyed your company and getting to know you better. There is a little present Ive been holding back all evening and i want it to be a nice little surprise. Close your eyes and dont peek”

Proceed to give her a solid kiss.
Job done
Doesn't work super well if her name isn't Jessica, though.
 

AureliusMaximus

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How do I go about asking for and getting a kiss on the first date?
You don't.
You just for for it. Or like Nike says in their slogan; Just do it! ;)

Asking for a kiss is a beta behavior and shows insecurity which chicks hate. If she doesn't feel it (E.g. turns away you'll know...).
They want a guy that is certain about his ways and feel confident about himself.

Asking for permission is big "no no" in my opinion.
 
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bat soup

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Generally it's a mistake to ask for a kiss. It's also a mistake to try to do it at the end of the date or in general, at any moment where it comes out of the blue.

What's better is to ramp up the physical contact gradually to the point where it's natural to kiss.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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BackInTheGame78

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In my opinion:

Definitely no need to ask...and no need to tell, either. Just do it.

I almost always kiss at the end of the date (very rarely will I deviate from this), and I almost always know, in my mind, BEFORE the date is over, whether there will be a kiss.

Actually I'll go you one further and say that I usually know within the first 5 minutes of meeting them...whether there will be a kiss at the of the date.
Just do it. Like Nike.
 

Modern Man Advice

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Oh man, that is a big no. You never ask a girl for a kiss. N.E.V.E.R.

Asking for permission shows you are unsure about her level of attraction towards you. But more importantly, it shows you are not leading or have confidence in yourself.

But to answer your question, you simply go for it. Assuming you can slightly read a woman's body, gestures, and vibe. It is fairly easy, once you try and fail several dozen times, to know when a woman wants you to kiss her.

Heck, even those that are more poker face, you still go for it. Getting rejected is not the end of the world. It has happened to me (founder of Modern Man Advice) a few times, in fact, it happened two weeks ago. I simply played it cool, didn't get butthurt or asked questions, you play it smooth and carry on.

The bottom line, just go for it. First, break the "contact barrier" by slightly touching her tight or lower back. Not for too long, just a quick touch to break that barrier. As the date goes by, you prolong that touch and read her body and see how she reacts when you get closer and closer to her (all of this while you are teasing her, having a convo, etc). We know it sounds complex but it'll be second nature the more you practice. If you sense that she is comfortable and welcoming your presence in her personal space, just simply get closer and closer (don't be afraid to sexualize the conversation as you get closer) and either go for her lips or have her meet you halfway.

Then last but not least, after you kiss her, play it cool and carry on the same conversation prior to the kiss or comment on how soft her lips are. Do not get hung up about the kiss, over compliment her, or stay in silence. Playing it cool will allow her to settle in the mood and continue to open up physically with you.

Hope this helps.

Modern Man Advice
 

BackInTheGame78

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Kiss when her face is close enough and there is eye contact. No asking. I’ve kissed 3 minutes into a date before.
I have good success with saying something like "your hair looks so soft..." and then run my fingers through it...if she seems to like it and doesn't pull back then this is pretty much a green light in terms of knowing whether you will be successful...
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

Barrister

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In my opinion you should be getting a kiss mid(first)-date if you are doing everything correctly. You need to be initiating kino almost immediately when the date begins. This is why sitting up at a bar makes this so much easier. Subtle things like your legs touching is a form of communication and lets her know you are physically interested without you needing to say anything. If she keeps her leg against yours, you are basically in at that point as long as you keep the conversation going smoothly. Next put your arm behind her chair. This is all subtly done. If for some reason she doesn't like it you will know -- but this rarely happens. The final step is to look at her deeply and then just kiss her. I have done this countless times on first dates. No words are needed.

Generally speaking, boldness is rewarded.
 

Machine10033

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98 percent success rate just putting my arm around her.. pulling her close and just kissing her.... always turned into a make out session... often times much more. One time I did it in my car and the girl pulled away quick and asked me if I wanted come in... I thought ok.... it’s on.... we then went into her apartment and she put will and grace on... her roommate came out and started watching it... the girl excuses herself and uses the bathroom downstairs.... and by the smell of things dropped a massive deuce. She then sat next to me on the couch and I was grossed out so I told her I had to roll.... no kiss!
 

Lookatu

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I think this sounds easy for most of us but I suspect from OP's threads that he is very novice in these situations.

I think for a kiss to not be awkward and be successful in his situation, he's going to have to build up and calibrate accordingly to it.

OP, I would recommend starting in stages and see how receptive she is and how she responds. Based on these inputs, you can go further and further. See how she responds to light touching(kino) while you guys are sitting down and talking. You can brush up against her, touch her arm or leg while trying to get points across or joke around. From there, hold her hand when you go for a walk or walk her to her car. From there if she hasn't pulled back, go in for the kiss.

Point is go in stages and warm her up to gauge her reaction to each stage before attempting to go to the next one.

One thing you'll learn OP that separates out the pros from amateurs is "calibration". A lot of guys don't have it and need to work on it.

Welcome
 

manfrombelow

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“Hey Jessica, ive thoroughly enjoyed your company and getting to know you better. There is a little present Ive been holding back all evening and i want it to be a nice little surprise. Close your eyes and dont peek”

Proceed to give her a solid kiss.
Job done
Nice, but a bit too long and a little bit cheesy.

I'd just say "Jessica, I have a surprise for you, close your eyes and don't peek"

Voilà!
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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