"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

How did this particular approach go so wrong?

Joined
Jun 22, 2009
Messages
144
Reaction score
2
I'm finding lately that I have a gift for talking to people. Turning that into successful number closes, however is a work in progress.

was in the checkout line tonight at my local grocery store.

"You know...it seems like whenever I walk in here, I need one particular thing that then takes me 30 minutes to find."

She laughed.

"I'm starfishandcoffee."

we BSed about the weather and her bottle of wine, and she seemed happy enough talking to me...not fawning, but I'd have been comfortable asking for a number, given the 2 minute conversation. Then here's what I came out swinging with, since I was up next in line...

"So, under any other circumstance, I'd ask you what you were up to tonight. But then it's probably the same thing we're all up to on a Tuesday...doing homework in our pajamas like me."

Her pleasant demeanor turned into a smirk.

"Well, good for you."

And that was that.

Was this doomed from the start of the approach? I'm not even sure *what* it was I did wrong, even though I know I did it. It may be time to start Don Juan Boot Camp...
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

Read more...

Darth

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 20, 2005
Messages
1,626
Reaction score
98
Age
36
starfishandcoffee said:
Her pleasant demeanor turned into a smirk.

"Well, good for you."
WARNING..Warning...
B!tch alert...b!tch alert...

Beep
Beep
Beep

Not worth the effort...Not worth the effort...Not worth the effort...

EDIT: Some girls like to play innocuous princess until they're sure they've got you and then...SNAP. The same behavior is observable in several members of the animal kingdom. I just call them LOW-CLASS B!TCHES.
 
Joined
Jun 22, 2009
Messages
144
Reaction score
2
If she was a total ***** (which I understand), then what was with the whole opening "nice" act. Wouldn't a diva want to be a diva 24/7?
 

MikeAndIke

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 15, 2012
Messages
33
Reaction score
0
Location
New York
I don't get it..... After she smirked, what happened? Did you just stop talking or did she walk away? How did the interaction end? I mean, it sounds like you were doing good. You may have shut yourself out with that comment "so under any other circumstance..." but you were doing good.
 

VladPatton

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 26, 2012
Messages
3,246
Reaction score
232
Location
NYC
You never know what you're gonna get with a cold approach. Nothing should surprise you, they know what you're after.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

Naughty Ninja

Banned
Joined
Apr 9, 2010
Messages
2,419
Reaction score
98
Location
Banned
starfishandcoffee said:
I'm finding lately that I have a gift for talking to people. Turning that into successful number closes, however is a work in progress.

was in the checkout line tonight at my local grocery store.

"You know...it seems like whenever I walk in here, I need one particular thing that then takes me 30 minutes to find."

She laughed.

"I'm starfishandcoffee."

we BSed about the weather and her bottle of wine, and she seemed happy enough talking to me...not fawning, but I'd have been comfortable asking for a number, given the 2 minute conversation. Then here's what I came out swinging with, since I was up next in line...

"So, under any other circumstance, I'd ask you what you were up to tonight. But then it's probably the same thing we're all up to on a Tuesday...doing homework in our pajamas like me."

Her pleasant demeanor turned into a smirk.

"Well, good for you."

And that was that.

Was this doomed from the start of the approach? I'm not even sure *what* it was I did wrong, even though I know I did it. It may be time to start Don Juan Boot Camp...

Most likely it was the fact she had wine and you alluded to meeting her tonight and said "pajamas". The chick picked up that you were looking to come over, drink wine and fvck her.

You could've said: What're you up to tonight? Doing homework like me? Then followed up with something like: Are you good with numbers? Put yours in my phone and we could go wine tasting sometime. (Since she had wine)

If she would've blown you off regardless you could've said something along the lines of: Why leave with sour grapes? Anyway I grade this brief interaction with a "C". C you later!
 
Joined
Jun 22, 2009
Messages
144
Reaction score
2
MikeAndIke said:
I don't get it..... After she smirked, what happened? Did you just stop talking or did she walk away? How did the interaction end? I mean, it sounds like you were doing good. You may have shut yourself out with that comment "so under any other circumstance..." but you were doing good.
I'd just gotten back from the gym, and I didn't appreciate the cvck-punch she'd just given me.

so, yes...I stood there like a b1tch for 30 seconds until I was called to come up next. throw your rotten vegetables.

Darth said:
Some girls like to play innocuous princess until they're sure they've got you and then...SNAP. The same behavior is observable in several members of the animal kingdom. I just call them LOW-CLASS B!TCHES.
This is depressing...however, this why I've stopped taking women seriously. Baby steps.

Naughty Ninja said:
Most likely it was the fact she had wine and you alluded to meeting her tonight and said "pajamas". The chick picked up that you were looking to come over, drink wine and fvck her.

You could've said: What're you up to tonight? Doing homework like me? Then followed up with something like: Are you good with numbers? Put yours in my phone and we could go wine tasting sometime. (Since she had wine)

If she would've blown you off regardless you could've said something along the lines of: Why leave with sour grapes? Anyway I grade this brief interaction with a "C". C you later!
good to know I'm on the right track. I wasn't even intending to hit on her, and it just happened. which, as I believe, is the way these things should happen...
 
Top