"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

How badly did I screw this up??

EastCoastGuy83

New Member
Joined
May 7, 2017
Messages
2
Reaction score
0
Age
43
I dated this 8.5/10 chick for 2 months. Everything was going great until she dumped me out of the blue. She said didn't feel feel a connection and didn't see a future for us. The sex was great, but I acted kinda immature, she was three years older than me, and she made more money than me.

After one week of no contact I texted her and wanted to meet up to talk (big mistake I know). We talked but she didn't want to get back together.

Two days later I unfriend her from facebook, and a day later I saw her re-appear on tinder. A week after unfriending her I sent another friend request and a text saying it was immature of me to delete her. She re-added me as a friend and said that was ok, but didn't text anything else to me.

From there I did another week no contact and texted her again asking how her job was going and if she wanted to meet up for a drink some night (another mistake). She replied and said she was good but it wasn't a good idea to meet because it would mean more to me than it would to her. Two hours later I replied with an angry text saying I shouldn't have even asked to meet for a drink and if she knew it wasn't working she should have dumped me after a month. She didn't reply.

I then went 21 days no contact. I went on dates with other women from tinder but these girls were 5-6's at best. After 21 days I sent my ex a short message saying I shouldn't have sent that angry text and sometimes it takes me a few failed attempts before I get the message it's over. I was trying to be funny, but unfortunately she didn't reply. That was one week ago.

Here's the thing. Why doesn't she just delete me on facebook or tell me not to contact her anymore? Not replying to me just seems cold.

I know she hasn't added any guys as facebook friends in the 6 weeks she has been on tinder. I know because I check her recently added facebook friends a few times a week (I realize facebook stalking is bad).

I'm tempted to just block her on facebook, but am confused because she isn't dating anyone and she told me she has been on anxiety medication in the past. She was also the best sex I ever had. I guess if I go 100% no contact she may eventually message me, but that is a very long shot and may take months or years.
 
Last edited:

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

Trump

Banned
Joined
Mar 12, 2011
Messages
3,000
Reaction score
1,669
Bro when a girl tells you "its over." you disappear like a magician. Any type of messages, texts, get togethers, and you are just validating her decision.

A woman 3 years older and making a higher salary is only good for sleeping with. If you are looking for something long term, she'll be looking to make your head spin.
 

btownbuck2012

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 10, 2008
Messages
1,436
Reaction score
1,520
Age
37
Location
Los Angeles
I dated this 8.5/10 chick for 2 months. Everything was going great until she dumped me out of the blue. She said didn't feel feel a connection and didn't see a future for us. The sex was great, but I acted kinda immature, she was three years older than me, and she made more money than me

After one week of no contact I texted her and wanted to meet up to talk (big mistake I know). We talked but she didn't want to get back together.

Two days later I decided to unfriend her from facebook, and a day after that I saw her re-appear on tinder. A week after unfriending her I sent another friend request and a text saying it was immature of me to delete her. She re-added me as a friend and said that was ok, but didn't text anything else to me.

From there I did one more week no contact and texted her again asking how her job was going and if she wanted to meet up for a drink some night (another mistake). She replied to my text and said she was good but it wasn't a good idea to meet because it would mean more to me than it would to her. Two hours later I replied with an angry text saying I shouldn't have even asked to meet for a drink and if she knew it wasn't working she should have dumped me after a month. She didn't reply.

I then went 21 days no contact. I went on dates with other women from tinder but these girls were 5-6's at best. After 21 days I sent my ex a short text saying I shouldn't have sent that angry text and sometimes it takes me a few failed attempts before I get the message it's over. I was basically trying to be funny, but unfortunately she didn't reply. That was one week ago.

Here's the thing. Why doesn't she just delete me on facebook or tell me not to contact her anymore? Not replying to my texts just seems cold.

I can see that she hasn't added any guys as facebook friends in the 6 weeks she has been on tinder. I know because I check her recently added facebook friends a few times a week (I know facebook stalking is bad).

I'm tempted to just block her on facebook, but am confused because she isn't dating anyone and she has told me she has been on anxiety medication in the past. She was also the best sex I ever had. I guess if I go 100% no contact she may eventually message me, but that is a very long shot and may take months or years.
How do you know she thought the sex was good?
 

mrgoodstuff

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 27, 2015
Messages
17,586
Reaction score
11,948
Location
DFW, TX
You're wasting your time. Block her immediately and move on. Find a new woman. You can't go back.
He can't go back, but she can come back to him. They usually do. Frame it around a meeting, don't spend a bunch of time chit-chatting.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

jester1x

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 28, 2000
Messages
398
Reaction score
34
Location
Elk Grove, CA
If it ever happens again, say "OK" then walk. If there was even a slight chance of her coming back to her, you blew it by trying to maintain some or any form of contact with her. It just shows you have no self respect nor value.

I've done it in the past too. It has never worked and is a complete waste of precious time and energy.
 

resilient

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 15, 2005
Messages
1,636
Reaction score
1,366
Forget the hooking up with you did with her. That's ancient history. Block her and stop checking her FB. Now. Time to vanish and focus on new prospects.

 

stovepipe

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 12, 2017
Messages
965
Reaction score
1,084
As the poster above stated, you're giving her an ego boost with the whole FB thing. Also making yourself look desperate which makes you less attractive to her. Let it go, you will only drive yourself more crazy if you don't.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

Glassguy

Moderator
Joined
Apr 25, 2016
Messages
4,789
Reaction score
8,861
Age
49
Remove the FB and all other social media and you will remove the temptation to stalk her every move. Plus she will realize that you cut all ties and it will drive her nuts, not that you will care because she will be blocked.
 

The Duke

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 4, 2008
Messages
6,541
Reaction score
11,500
Eastcoastguy- I'd suggest you stop worrying about her and start worrying more about yourself. You have a lot of maturing/learning to do. This girl was straight up with you. She wasn't being confusing, she said there was "NO CONNECTION". Get over yourself.

You are acting like a needy little game playing beta biatch.
 

EastCoastGuy83

New Member
Joined
May 7, 2017
Messages
2
Reaction score
0
Age
43
Thanks for the advice everyone. It's helpful to hear different points of view.
 
Top