marriage = contractFrancisco d'Anconia said:So we are talking about the difference between commitments and contracts...![]()
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
marriage = contractFrancisco d'Anconia said:So we are talking about the difference between commitments and contracts...![]()
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
A contract with a great golden parachute for women and a fvcked up escape clause for men.Latinoman said:marriage = contract
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You are talking about how this will affect the HUSBAND. I am talking about how it will effect the lover.Latinoman said:Okay...lets assume your business partner is with this slut (money hungry slut).
Let's say something happens to him that cost his life. Do you the difference between having that "money hungry slut" as a girlfriend vs. having her as a wife?
As a girlfriend...she is out of the picture.
As a wife...she will take over his portion of the business and if she wants too...she can sell her portion.
That's the difference between LEGAL commitment and commitment.
That depends if the willingly manipulative woman is not just using you to tick her husband off and consequently blow your brains out with a handgun.Bonhomme said::yes:
In fact, if you do it halfway good, she will often give her power to you ...
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
Are you suggesting that some guys would WANT to have their wives cheat on them?Bonhomme said:The problem with the "golden rule" is that everybody want to be "done unto" in different ways.
I might enjoy someone blasting some whacked-out spazz-rock, whereas someone else might be driven crazy by it.
I've found that everything comes down to circumstances. But beware of people using that as a cop-out from responsibility.
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
Focus on single women...absolutely. But we're ALL opportunists when it comes to sex, anyone who says different is lying.Mr.Positive said:I'll focus on the single quality woman.
True, however my point is that as men, we should have enough self-control to CHOOSE which opportunity is worth pursuing.STR8UP said:Focus on single women...absolutely. But we're ALL opportunists when it comes to sex, anyone who says different is lying.
The "golden rule" has little if any foundation other than making you feel good (any maybe playing the morality card). Consider the non-smokers who have died from Cancer because of second hand smoke. Consider a mother, father and their nine month old daugher who dies while driving home from Grandma's on a Saturday night because they got broadsided by a drunk driver who miraclessly survives the accident.Bonhomme said:The problem with the "golden rule" is that everybody want to be "done unto" in different ways.....
Your words....the first line in your post.Mr.Positive said:I'm sorta kicking myself for this one...
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Francisco....I think this might be your best post to date.Francisco d'Anconia said:The "golden rule" has little if any foundation other than making you feel good (any maybe playing the morality card). Consider the non-smokers who have died from Cancer because of second hand smoke. Consider a mother, father and their nine month old daugher who dies while driving home from Grandma's on a Saturday night because they got broadsided by a drunk driver who miraclessly survives the accident.
Consider the contless men, women and children who have shot dead at school or work by some pissed of guy who just broken up with his girlfriend, they were in the wrong place at the wrong time because they either was trying to get an education of make enough money for the mortgage... "Golden rule..." Pffffttttttt......
The Golden Rule, Karma, Faith and the like are pannaceas that help people get through life, it's just another form of "hope." Hope has no effect on your destiny nor the destinies of others. Consider my examples, did hope or the golden rule help any of those people in their times of need? At best it gives them some solice if something beyond their control happens.
Your actions have outcomes, or consequences for those who enjoy focusing on the possible fear, gloom and doom of their actions. I seldom hear about the consequences of someone who gets a good education or someone who achieves in securing a career that's viable to them. Are their outcomes consequences? Bygones...
The purpose of this sermon was to point out that the many of the "feel good" sayings tossed around in society only do one thing, they make you feel good, it has little bearing on what's happening around you; anyone remember "Don't worry be happy?" What Bonhomme said about people wanting to be done onto in different ways is an attestment that projecting those sayings (your epectations) beyond yourself into the rest of the world is akin to putting your fate into someone elses hands.
:yes: You've got it. In your first example, you are just a third party (unless you yourself have committed yourself to someone). She is cheating on her husband. Who are you cheating on, her husband too?STR8UP said:...When you fukk someone elses wife or g/f YOU aren't doing anything wrong. When you ARE the wife or g/f, you ARE doing something wrong. If it's your best friends girl, that's a different story.
Good point. All Karma does is give people a reason to b1tch and gripe sometime in the future when they are in the wrong place at the wrong time, they can blame it on Karma (an easy scapegoat).STR8UP said:...
What if you didn't KNOW she was married? You still fukked a married woman. Is Karma gonna get you in a case like this?
You are right. At the time of this post, which was only hours after, I was questioning my reaction. Honestly, I was thinking "how in the f*ck could I have passed this up?"STR8UP said:Your words....the first line in your post.
You were caught with your pants down (bad euphamism) and in retrospect you didn't react how you would have liked to.
Great post, this is very deep, and a lot to ponder.Francisco d'Anconia said:The Golden Rule, Karma, Faith and the like are pannaceas that help people get through life, it's just another form of "hope." Hope has no effect on your destiny nor the destinies of others. Consider my examples, did hope or the golden rule help any of those people in their times of need? At best it gives them some solice if something beyond their control happens.
The purpose of this sermon was to point out that the many of the "feel good" sayings tossed around in society only do one thing, they make you feel good, it has little bearing on what's happening around you; anyone remember "Don't worry be happy?" What Bonhomme said about people wanting to be done onto in different ways is an attestment that projecting those sayings (your epectations) beyond yourself into the rest of the world is akin to putting your fate into someone elses hands.
'Nuff said.Mr.Positive said:...Karma doesn't pay dividends for good behavior.
...Maybe, if more men lead as individuals, the group, as a whole will benefit.
...The reward..is within ourselves.
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.