"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Hitting it from the back

E

Ease

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As a rookie at back door invasions, does anyone have any words on this?

First, what lube would you use. I see the 'sex lubricants' in pharmacy, but there must be something more common. I thought about olive oil, but that sounds like a bad idea.

Also, what is the likelyhood of getting **** on your sword? That would definitely be a mood killer for me.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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S

SoldMySoul

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Ease said:
As a rookie at back door invasions, does anyone have any words on this?

First, what lube would you use. I see the 'sex lubricants' in pharmacy, but there must be something more common. I thought about olive oil, but that sounds like a bad idea.

Also, what is the likelyhood of getting **** on your sword? That would definitely be a mood killer for me.
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I cannot believe I am answering this! Astro Glide, KY and many other water based products are best! Yes, you can get $hit on your shaft, but if she cleans well enough not so much. I have never let the $hit on my shingle deter me from backdoor action. If she is hot, you deal with it unless it is a damn mess.
 
speed dawg

speed dawg

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Olive oil, WTF?
 
T

thefonz

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I hear that a girls' tears make the best lube....

But seriously, word on the street is that astroglide is the best for ballonknot boning. Go to like a sex or pot shop someplace and they should sell it there.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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D

Drum&Bass

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You NEED to expect to get sh!t on your **** thats just the way it is...Just be cool about it dont mention it to her and wash up.

and for god sake !!! PLEASE DON'T MAKE HER SUCK YOUR D!CK AFTER HAVING ANAL !!
 
Poonani Maker

Poonani Maker

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Ahhh condom? Just change condoms, sh!t is gone...
 
J

Julian

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piitb
 
G

Gears of Led Zep

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Wow! At first I thought the title was a euphemism, guess not! No subtlties in this thread

I think you should be mentally prepared and not just d1ck-prepared...personally I only feel around the EXIT with my fingers...I save my chinese dragon for the real spec ops missions

sorry Ease this thread is hilarious
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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