Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
You're actually not dissing him in any way. No one disputes the concept has been around for ages. What we're (now) discussing is if the term Plate Theory, as used in this way, is his own.taiyuu_otoko said:I heard about "Plate theory" for the first time about 10 years ago, by a differnent name from a different guru. No diss to Rollo, but I think its a fairly common sense principle.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
It is in common use in many disciplines. The economists tell us to "diversify our investments".taiyuu_otoko said:I heard about "Plate theory" for the first time about 10 years ago, by a differnent name from a different guru. No diss to Rollo, but I think its a fairly common sense principle.
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
jophil28 said:It is in common use in many disciplines.
Plate Theory is NOT about ƒucking as many women as possible. It's about the confidence that's derived from recognizing real options. Hitting it with multiple women can be a bonus, but it's not the end to the means.taiyuu_otoko said:I think the story of johnny appleseed may be a metaphor for fukking the **** out of as many women as possible
Rollo Tomassi said:Plate Theory is NOT about ƒucking as many women as possible. It's about the confidence that's derived from recognizing real options. Hitting it with multiple women can be a bonus, but it's not the end to the means.
I couldn't speak from personal experience with regard to Plate Theory progression. I have always had a natural talent.ketostix said:The problem I have with it is if you really have options how were you able to successfully obtained those options without confidence in the first place. It just seems like a chicken and egg dilemma, where you see the effect and attribute it as the cause. So by reason you don't need multiple plates to have confidence, right? I think that's where me and Str8up stand on it. Where is that guy at anyway? He's propbably fcloseing girls and everyone ran him off so we're not going to hear about it.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.