HB8 coming over to watch movie

[pyros]

hi.

so we argued for a bit, and from there the date went from so-so to bad to ok to so-so to bad.

First date she was on time. Second date she texted ne to say that she was gonna be 15 mins late; in the end she came 30 mins late so I was about to leave when she arrived. She could not find a place to park her bike but couldn't she text me again to say: please, wait 15 more mins, ?
Third date she came 20mins late to what I said to her that she should be on time for next dates cause Im not gonna wait for her everytime.

Fourth date she fell asleep so I got to the place and she calle me blah blah, as I said before, so I cancelled the date.

Then, last date, this fifth date, as I said she texted me to say that she was gonna be a bit late again. She was coming by bike to what I say in the morning: do you want me to go to pick you up? or you're fine? and she said: no im fine, ill go by bike.
I got a bit upset and said to her that I would spank her in the ass, to what she replied that if I was gonna get upset for that she may just turn and go home blah blah as I said in the previous post.

In the end she said if I could pick her up at some street, so I did.
There in the car I asked her if she always was gonna be late. She got upset, she said several times that it is not big deal, that she's always late and her friends are ok with it. Blah blah, I was totally relaxed but I insisted that I do not like that, and it is not normal to be more than 10 mins late everytime.
She insisted again that it was ok and I was the weird one and threatened me to not see her again, to what I reply that if she was gonna do that always, Im not interested.


Well, we went to my place. She somehow critisised my house saying it was small. We had dinner she was upset I ordered pizzas instead of cooking for her. I did a salad and prepared sangria and I ordered a pizza, the flat was looking nice and clean, I had music playing etc.

Then the dinner went more or less ok. She brought a dessert she made (because last time she fell asleep when we were suposed to meet, remember?).
Then I wanted to show her some videos on youtube but she looked kind of bored + her previous behaviour + we agreed to watch a movie but (since she arrived 45 mins late) she said that we better watch a movie some other time.
So I suggested I'd drive her home.
Then in the car she kind of tried to create conversation. She asked me many questions, talked etc. so did I.
Then in front of her house we talked more, well she did, we laughed a bit so I thought we may make out but then she talked again about the previous date where she fell asleep and joked about it (kind of making fun of me?), then I said that it was not funy and then she said: 'well, I hope you did not cry at home.'
and I said: 'cry? please, I have other things to do you know?'

Then this ***** hugged me and said: well I hope I see you tomorrow at X pub Im going with a male friend and in the morning Im going to rollerblade with him, you may join us in the evening.

(We had agreeded to roller blade some time but it seems she's gonna do it with this guy friend. It could be a lie but she's such a silly *****)


I may have overreacted with the 'being late' thing, but it is because she's never been on time except for the first date. 5 dates, just one date on time, the rest more than 15 mins late.
She's always telling me how her male friends but her stuff, ask her out, are veeeeery nice to her, not like me, etc etc



What do you think?

P.S.
I'd like to bang her , damn it! but with her attitude + las comments in my car I think shes just stupid.

 

[csycpr]

You wanted to show her some youtubes? Dunno, man, that sounds ultra-lame to me.

I have to say, it sure does sound like you were making too big a deal out of the lateness thing, and more in a whiny sort of a way rather than an assertive sort of way.

Anyway, did you actually try anything with her? Like a bit of kino or to turn up the sexual talk? Or were you waiting for "the perfect moment"?

you should have asked her "oh yeah are you gonna be late for him too" ahahaha

Lol.

 

[pyros]

bradd80

what do you think about the last two dates?
the one I cancelled because she fell asleep and the last one at my place.
She even said that she did not like that I cancelled the previous date, that the normal thing to do is just to wait for her for a while, and then start the date as if nothing happened.

 

[pyros]

csycpr

I was not waiting for nothing because the mood was not good.
She was kind of upset all the time except for the last 10mins in the car were she was ok but then she mentioned the failed previous date where she fell asleep, I said it was not funy and then the mood turned bad, she said her final convo: 'im gonna rollerblade with this guy friend of mine tomorrow (when she agreeded that we would) and Im going with him also to X pub, I hope you join us'


Ideas?

P.S.
she's this kind of girl that thinks shes a princess and that all guys fear her or something.

 

[pyros]

lol pyros i think you should probably give up on this one haha

you should have asked her "oh yeah are you gonna be late for him too" ahahaha

*pyros your thread was definitely the funniest thing i've read on so suave all day, and there have been some pretty good threads today.. can't really blame you for being upset at her lateness but next time try not to make such a big deal out of it if you want the girl to at least make out with you! The best part was when she joked about falling asleep and you got all serious and said "that's not funny" hahahaha man you're hilarious!

well she said that I joked a bit but she kept repeating it so in the end I said: well it is not that funy.
so she said: 'well I hope you did not go home to cry after you cancelled our date'
reply: 'cry? please, I had more things to do you know? you could have had a lot of fun that night with me'
her: 'yes and you with me. But my male flat mate me cooked some pasta for me for dinner so I had a nic time too'

 

[csycpr]

csycpr

I was not waiting for nothing because the mood was not good.
She was kind of upset all the time except for the last 10mins in the car were she was ok but then she mentioned the failed previous date where she fell asleep, I said it was not funy and then the mood turned bad, she said 'im gonna rollerblad with this guy friend of mine tomorrow (when she agreeded that we would) and Im going with him also to X pub, I hope I see you there'


Ideas?

P.S.
she's this kind of girl that thinks shes a princess and that all guys fear her or something.

Perfect. Based on what you've described, I can see plenty of opportunities to bust on/tease this chick (in a PLAYFUL, not a whiny way). But maybe that's not you, personality-wise. If it's not, you should work on it, because it can really come in handy when it comes to changing the general mood of a date. It seems to me that you're resigned to "the mood" being in the hands of the gods or something, rather accepting some responsibility for shaping it yourself.

I'm curious, does she ever laugh at stuff you say?

 

[pyros]

If I want to bang her....
should I let some days pass and contac her again? or what for her to contact me?

SHe's going with a guy friend to X pub and she 'wanted' me to join them...is she kidding me? silly *****.

What now fellas?

 

[pyros]

Perfect. Based on what you've described, I can see plenty of opportunities to bust on/tease this chick (in a PLAYFUL, not a whiny way). But maybe that's not you, personality-wise. If it's not, you should work on it, because it can really come in handy when it comes to changing the general mood of a date. It seems to me that you're resigned to "the mood" being in the hands of the gods or something, rather accepting some responsibility for shaping it yourself.

I'm curious, does she ever laugh at stuff you say?

yes, she always laugh at my jokes. I tease her a lot but since today the mood was negative...
And when she came to my place, after criticising it and saying it was small ( to what I reply: do you live in an arabian palace or what?) I created a conversation for the next 20mins. Then she also created more conversation etc.

Anyway, I want next steps to follow please.

 

[pyros]

Yes I've been reading this forum so this is why I do not want to accept *****y behaviour i.e. arriving late everytime, falling asleep and wanting me to wait for her even longer. Now you're confusing me really, I should ignore this? what?

Keep in mind that this date happened before the previous one where she fell asleep and I cancelled it so I was a bit ... burned.

see this, we agreeded to meet at 22h at my place At 21:15 she texts me to say that she's probably gonna be late. Then I said that Im gonna spak her in the ass for being late again, to what she replies: hey, in my free time I dont want to stress myself. If you wait ill be there, if you dont want to wait Ill turn. ( so you say bradd80 that if I want to bang her I should have ignored this and just say: fine. ?)
me: ok, so turn if you want.
her: ok if this is whay you want.
me: just come here and we'll see. My special dish is gonna get cold.
her: hahaha ok.

then at 22:00:
her: sorry Im still on the way, my mother called me because her uncle just died. Can you come to pick me up?
me: what? yes, Ill be there.


Then when we met is when I said to her this stuff about being late everytime blah blah, she said that it is ok to be late, that all her friends find it fine. That if Im at my place I can just relax there and wait for her blah blah. SShe got more upset and said that her not very close uncle died and her mother called her and this is why she arrived even later.
I said that this I totally understand, that this was not the problem. The problem was that she's always late blah blah, and that she finds it ok but I dont.



But what do you do if a girl arrives always late? you just ignore it you say? if you're at a restaurant waiting for her you just keep waiting and smile?
The thing is she finds it OK TO BE LATE. She finds it totally normal, or at least she says so.
What do you think about this evil comments she made about my house or about me? or about 'going to rollerblade with a guy friend' when we agreeded to go, and she wanting me to join them in the evening?
this hurted me a bit.

P.S.
the thing is I want to bang her. But now I feel upset and a bit angry and I just think this girl is not worth it, but on the other hand I think to myself that if I had just let pass the being late thing, I could have banged her already, and this is what i WANT. But I told you before, after reading SS so much, I did not want to accept ****ty behaviour and set a firm frame.

 

[azrael]

i read somewhere that the person that is late holds the frame , maybe i read it at rsd, so why don't you be late in the next meeting, i have this girl and i hate to wait so i made her wait for me.

If she is always late by 20-30 min. arrive 40 minutes late, if she calls you, you say you are almost there and made her wait.

Unless this kind of thing is to formulaic or Betta for the SS crowd.

 

[Pimp-sicle]

Your too caught up in trying to follow rules that you are reading here, but the problem is your behavior and all is NOT congruent; and she knows it.

In other words, this byatch doesn't really respect you and see's you as one of her many followers in her fan club.

A girl who is late 5-10 mins whether its one time or every time isn't THAT big of a deal, if its more than that then you have a right to be saying WTF.

Realize that to bang a girl you have to control the frame and create & escalate attraction. You have done none of these things.

You have zero chance to bang her, part of getting good with women is learning when to cut your losses.

Here, I'm handing you some internet scissors so you can man up.......







PIMP

 

[Purefilth]

^^^ this too

i read somewhere that the person that is late holds the frame , maybe i read it at rsd, so why don't you be late in the next meeting, i have this girl and i hate to wait so i made her wait for me.

If she is always late by 20-30 min. arrive 40 minutes late, if she calls you, you say you are almost there and made her wait.

Unless this kind of thing is to formulaic or Betta for the SS crowd.

If youre gonna go with Brad and salvage this girl as a challenge, then I like this idea. i would go further and be later than her for absolutely everything from now on in.
However I think you need to work on your "I dont give a fvck" attitude.
Not caring, or at least, appearing not to care is something that will draw her in.
"always beware of the girl who's daddy calls her 'princess', the chances are that she believes it!"

She has so many orbiters treating her like royalty you say?
if you do get this chick, then they will all be working against you to split the pair of you up - just something to bear in mind bro.

 

[pyros]

Yes she does believe she's a princess.
Previous date she wanted me to buy her a mojito, I did not, she said she could not believe I did not buy it for her, that all her guy friends are more than willing to do so.
I said that she should buy it for me and next time I will. She did but it for me and 1 hour later we were making out pretty good. Also she wante me to buy her a rose in another date and I just joked about it and did not.

The ****ing thing here is, as I said, in five dates she's been:
1 date: in time.
2 date: 30 mins late. She called to say that she will be 15 mins late but in the en it was 30mins, so I was already in my car about to leave when she call me to say that she just arrived and I said to her that: ok, I was about to leave, next time be in time.
3 date: 15 mins late. I said that if she's gonna be late everytime it is not good.
4 date: she fell asleep (because she was exhausted, she said) and called me just at the time we arranged to meet. Then she called to say she was sorry several times, texted me etc.
5 date: call to say that she was gonna be 15-20 mins late. Here I just did not like it happened again. Yes, she was coming by bike to my place, she prepared a dessert for me, but...again?? and after the failed previous date?? and the thing is she finds it ok to be late, she says she does not understand why I get upset.


Yes, she has orbiters all around. Her male friends that buy her stuff, invite her, ask her out blah blah...
When she got to my place and she saw that I was gonna order pizza she got angry because she said: 'come on man, you get mad at me because im late but you did not even cook? I just dont understand where was the hurry.'

So the hurry you ***** is because you've been late 4 out of 5 times and you came late again after you fell asleep in our previous date I cancelled in the end, this is why.

Dont you find this a lack of respect guys?
Besides, see how she wants to hurt me of make me jelaous that we agreeded to go roller-blading one day. IN the end she could not make it so we left it for another time but, last night in my car she said: 'well, what are you gonna do tomorrow? Im going to roller blade with this male friend of mine and then to a pub in the evening, I hope you join us then.'



I cant stop thinking that if I had not gotten upset because she was late again, I could have banged her or something.

 

[csycpr]

When she got to my place and she saw that I was gonna order pizza she got angry because she said: 'come on man, you get mad at me because im late but you did not even cook? I just dont understand where was the hurry.'

Lol, that's kinda funny. I can just imagine standing there trying to think of an excuse for why you were so upset besides "cos that's what I read on sosuave." haha

I cant stop thinking that if I had not gotten upset because she was late again, I could have banged her or something.

The idea behind being firm with shtty behavior is so that you don't get walked over. And also it can work in your favor in the long run because it helps to instill an attitude of "not caring" (about the outcome), which can increase your attractiveness/how confident you appear. But in the short term, when you're still just learning, it can work against you, because, as the guy said above, you're just "trying to follow the rules" without really having internalized them, not really acting congruently with them. I don't think any rule ever suggested "getting upset" or making a big scene about girl being late. Come on man, how the hell is that going to appear attractive?

As for "the next step," just make plans to see her again. It sounds like she still likes you. Just relax a bit more and stop with the whining about lateness and crap like that.

 

[StepItUp]

If a girl said to me you didn't even cook I would laugh at them and continue to talk, try to avoid arguments with girls(unless they are emotionally invested eg LTR) because in there mind you will never win so why bother?

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

On a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being a great catch, this girl is a 2.

Nobody is going to be impressed if you bang her. Move on.

 

[pyros]

Hi Brad.


Thanks for the tips.
Just one thing, I have not banged her yet. I say this because you said: 'we can get you to bang her again'


Anyway. After our last failed date, next day she texts just to let me know that she sent me some music video links, and to ask me again if I'm going to X pub because she's gonna be there.


I reply to her two hours later saying that Im meeting a female friend of mine, and that I may go to X pub too.

Later at night I go to X club where another chick is waiting for me (im not very attracted to her anyways...). There I text the HB8 asking where is she. She tells me and asks me if I'm there.
From that moment I wanted to go see her with this other chick by my side, but this chick bumped into some friends so she did not want to move.

In the end I did not go to seek for the HB8 because I was having a great time and besides, she did not write to me again or anything.


Now I wanted to wait for her to write me again and from there set up another date.
Good? I dont know if this matters but I think that if I let many days pass after the last time we made out (one week ago) things may get cold, dont you think?




Thanks.

 

[PUK]

Hi OP

Reading this thread just tells me you need to stop been pedantic over lateness and just crank some Marvin Gaye "Lets get it on" and slip it in her (when she comes over to your house next...if she does come over)

Kind Regards

PUK

 

[pyros]

I'd like to take her to the beach and have a picnik, play volley and go for a walk but since she finishes work at 19h, we would meet at 20h or later so it would be too dark.

Im thinking that I either take her for a drink at a nice pub and for a walk around a nice area/park, or taking her to the movies and for a walk or going to dance salsa again (we've gone three times already)
Last night was when she let me know she was gonna be in X club, we texted but in the end I did not go to seek for her.

She sent me some links to my email but it seems she did it wrong because I did not receive anything.
I was thinking about either contacting her today to let her know that I did not receive that, and to arrange something for tomorrow night, or waiting one more day and same thing but for wednesday.



What do you think?

 

[cordoncordon]

I'd like to take her to the beach and have a picnik, play volley and go for a walk but since she finishes work at 19h, we would meet at 20h or later so it would be too dark.

Im thinking that I either take her for a drink at a nice pub and for a walk around a nice area/park, or taking her to the movies and for a walk or going to dance salsa again (we've gone three times already)
Last night was when she let me know she was gonna be in X club, we texted but in the end I did not go to seek for her.

She sent me some links to my email but it seems she did it wrong because I did not receive anything.
I was thinking about either contacting her today to let her know that I did not receive that, and to arrange something for tomorrow night, or waiting one more day and same thing but for wednesday.



What do you think?

I think you are wasting your time.

You two don't really even seem to like each others company all that much, so I don't know why you want to spend more time with her. Because you consider her an 8? Too much stress, worry, analysis, and over thinking in regards to this one. To me it's like you two keep going out with each other because you have nothing better to do, not because you really like each other. The whole thing seems like a big power battle game, with the other night at the pub where you met the other girl but wanted to have her meet this girl with her by your side as an example.

And question, how can you go into a pub, which are usually small to medium sized, and not even see the other girl? That doesn't makes sense. Are you sure she was even there?

Anyway, like I said this all seems like a giant waste of time to me. I would move on and only do something with her IF she contacts you and seems ready to do something sexual.