"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

Girls called me mean

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

Tails

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Mar 2, 2004
Messages
411
Reaction score
0
Age
42
Location
Perth, Australia
Stop being mean.
 

AFK Protector

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 3, 2004
Messages
1,596
Reaction score
4
Location
United States of America
Originally posted by Tails
Stop being mean.
Man, this frustration is building up...everything I do isn't DJ like and it turns out to be mean. At least when I was a nice guy, everyone was cool with me. However, this girl is just one out of many and I'm still a nice guy them all. I need to reconcile.

-Nice guy for life.
 

AFK Protector

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 3, 2004
Messages
1,596
Reaction score
4
Location
United States of America
ok screw it all again. This girl wasn't exactly a goodie two shoes towards me neither. Some women deserve my respect, others don't. She's simply not one of them. I'm gonna ignore her. I dno't need people like her in my life. Freaking control freak think she owns by AFK protecting 4ss. And about by book convo. now that i think about it, i did the right thing. She can carry her own d@mn books. Always freeloading off stuff I'm accountable for. God, I'm mad. There's my plan:

-Believe in what I believe
-Respect people who respect me back
-Don't take **** from girls like her
-Deny false accusations. :\
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

squirrels

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 15, 2003
Messages
6,620
Reaction score
186
Age
47
Location
A universe...where heartbreak and sadness have bee
Be specific. You're too vague about what you're doing that's "mean" for anyone to offer serious advice.
 

Reto

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 3, 2003
Messages
836
Reaction score
1
Age
53
Originally posted by squirrels
Be specific. You're too vague about what you're doing that's "mean" for anyone to offer serious advice.
Yeah, if it's in a playful way, and you busted on her, you're in.

If you called her a wh0re and spit in her face, yeah. You're mean...
 

DankNuggs

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 14, 2003
Messages
586
Reaction score
0
Originally posted by AFK Protector
ok screw it all again. This girl wasn't exactly a goodie two shoes towards me neither. Some women deserve my respect, others don't. She's simply not one of them. I'm gonna ignore her. I dno't need people like her in my life. Freaking control freak think she owns by AFK protecting 4ss. And about by book convo. now that i think about it, i did the right thing. She can carry her own d@mn books. Always freeloading off stuff I'm accountable for. God, I'm mad. There's my plan:

-Believe in what I believe
-Respect people who respect me back
-Don't take **** from girls like her
-Deny false accusations. :\
I presume you're in HS, you are wise beyond your years...Remember that list you made...
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

uniassign

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 6, 2003
Messages
646
Reaction score
1
Being called "mean" is good.

It is also a test to see whether you will back track to being "nice". If you do, then the girl loses attraction straight away because she knows that it is just an act you are putting on.

When a girl calls me "mean" or "bastard" or something along those lines, I just laugh at her and then sarcastly be SUPER nice to her (hug her, pat her on the head etc).
 

LordBrian

Don Juan
Joined
May 29, 2003
Messages
145
Reaction score
0
Location
Northern Virginia
A friend of mine who I am not DJing calls me an A-hole after watching me with other girls. I think thats better than being a nice guy...

Its funny, after she says that I say,

"Now ask me if I care"

*imitating a girls voice* "Do you care brian?"

"No, I dont"

followed by a laugh.
 

Walk this Way

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 2, 2004
Messages
107
Reaction score
1
It's not mean if you make sure she knows you're just joking. One time a woman and I were teasing each other, and I crossed the line when I said, "Hey you know ________, I was petting my dog last night in my dream. And then I realized it was your leg!" [Yeah, it was that kinda night]. And she laughed but sounded like she felt bad, so I went up to her, put my arm around her, brought her close too my body, and tenderly kissed her and she smiled.

I hate being mean, or overly macho. There's a very real difference between being a jerk or a player and being a decent person.
 

ScrewIt

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 11, 2004
Messages
1,769
Reaction score
2
Originally posted by Walk this Way
It's not mean if you make sure she knows you're just joking. One time a woman and I were teasing each other, and I crossed the line when I said, "Hey you know ________, I was petting my dog last night in my dream. And then I realized it was your leg!" [Yeah, it was that kinda night]. And she laughed but sounded like she felt bad, so I went up to her, put my arm around her, brought her close too my body, and tenderly kissed her and she smiled.

I hate being mean, or overly macho. There's a very real difference between being a jerk or a player and being a decent person.
walkthisway: was that HB your gf or someone you were dating. cause no girl would let you kiss them unless you they're already intimate with you.

yea, there's a difference between beinga jerk,player, and nice guy. you can be called a jerk, just cause of the things you do. but the girls will call on it as if it's a tease. actually, if a girl said that i was mean or a jerk, i would take it as a compliment.
it's something you rarely hear them say, and when they do say it, it means they have a somehwat high IL in you.
It's easy to tell if they're joking by the expression on their face, and by what you did to them. if you actualy did something bad to hurt their feelings or criticize them...then u KNOW you were being a ****.

on the other hand, if they call you a DI*K, then, well they just plain hate your guts.
 

AFK Protector

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 3, 2004
Messages
1,596
Reaction score
4
Location
United States of America
Ok guys. I'm back. Yea, I'm in high school. I guess I was freaking out about a research paper, a few debate/math tourneys etc. Very nice points. I think the last post I made contradicted itself. I'm not going to go back being nice. Yes, decent and interesting is good...nice is just boring. I'm not letting her push me around anymore, which I feel is my biggest accomplishment so far. I'm gonna stick to those 4 things.

When they call me mean, its after: I don't act like a chump and their personal b1tch. I offer resistance. I make them wait. I don't give them money (lol...I never give them money).

^^^I noticed all of those have DON'T in them in reference to stuff I don't do for them. I'm through with that crap. i'm here to live my own life...I mean...hell, I don't even get PAID for that first class service I used to perform.

And you're all right. Now that I think of it, when I'm just a TAD bit "mean" (joking around with them...I always make it apparent I'm joking...they must be dense or something) they say I'm mean...when I KNOW there are guys they put up with 10 times as "mean" as me...if you can call me mean. Great tips, thanks for the encouragement, and it feels great to be back.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

AFK Protector

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 3, 2004
Messages
1,596
Reaction score
4
Location
United States of America
Originally posted by Reto
Yeah, if it's in a playful way, and you busted on her, you're in.

If you called her a wh0re and spit in her face, yeah. You're mean...
100% playful/teasing/flirting/joking. Good point. I needed that cold hard slap. I don't call girls wh0res, b1tches, or other derogatory terms.
 

Walk this Way

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 2, 2004
Messages
107
Reaction score
1
Originally posted by ScrewIt
walkthisway: was that HB your gf or someone you were dating. cause no girl would let you kiss them unless you they're already intimate with you.

She was a close friend. We had dated once before, and she was single when I kissed her, so it was no big deal. And I did it abruptly, so yeah...
 
Top