"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Girl asked me to go with her to Pride party?
- Thread starter mikey2012
- Start date
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Gay people know how to party.
My response would be:
"Ill go, but only if we are leaving together after."
Just to test her interest level.
Desdinova
Master Don Juan
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Honestly, I think society (at least here in Canada) is at a point where we don't need these parties anymore because LGBT is very widely accepted. All it does is continue to make LGBT an issue.
It's your decision on whether or not you want to go. I don't think a snarky response is appropriate here. Just tell her you're not interested in attending.
Von
Master Don Juan
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Invite her to go at the Pride Parade in MTL.
Now, you'll have what you want and she can "Pride party"
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
wifehunter
Master Don Juan
Dingo
Master Don Juan
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If you're not banging her why go ?
All she wants is the "expose you" to their lifestyle or show you off as the enlightened straight friend.
Pass.
devilkingx2
Master Don Juan
and the two girls I know who claimed that (they went to pride but are straight) are both obviously in denial about their sexualities (that's a long story but take my word for it, I know they're both not straight)
the only possible reason I'd go is to meet bi chicks and I'd never let anyone catch wind of the fact that I was going or that I was there (don't let any proof exist of you being there, no pictures!)
old_skoolr
Master Don Juan
Hot girls used to go gay clubs, because they wouldn't get hit on as much.
Straight guys figured this out and started going to get the hot girls.
After a while, it stopped being known as a gay club.
If your uncomfortable dont go, But what @cola said made sense.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
SmooveMooves
Master Don Juan
She's basically saying you seem gay to her. That says there something about you that you need to change.
Also, that was a gay response. If you were gonna go the snarky route, you should've at least said something funny.
Nothing that needs changing, he did the right thing by just NEXTING her.
I didn't say anything. "Okayyyy" was just what I was thinking to myself. I never responded. Nothing about me is gay. I was making out with other girls in front of her in a club. She knows I'm not gay. I haven't made a move on her because I have other plates. She's in my orbit. After that comment she is no longer in my orbit. I've nexted her.
wifehunter
Master Don Juan
Sometimes, a few words is all it takes. Saves time, anyway.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
True that. I'm experienced enough to recognize that as lack of interest. I think she was being factious by asking me to go. If she had asked me to go and I made clear I wasn't and gay and she said something like "Don't worry , I'll make sure they don't think you are gay" then maybe I would have gone.
wifehunter
Master Don Juan
Yeah, she didn't do a good job of selling it.
MatureDJ
Master Don Juan
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Interesting. Once - maybe 15 years ago - I was at a nightspot that as usual had nothing going on, and I noticed down the street a place called "The Rainbow" that seemed to have a lot of attractive women walking around, so I decided to check it out (for whatever reason, I didn't catch on to the name). Of course, it was a lesbian place; perhaps it was also for homo men, but I didn't see any men in an embrace, so maybe not. In fact, unlike every other nightspot, there were very few men there - and also, unlike every other nightspot, there were a fair number of attractive women. Yes, I know that the stereotypical lesbian is ugly, but these women were easily on average better looking than what was seen at heteronormative places. I was so overwhelmed by how many attractive women were there that it took me a few minutes to realize that they were a lot chummier with each other than what is usually seen, after which, of course, I bolted. I wonder if the men I saw there were just hoping to catch on a lezzie that was feeling adventurous.
devilkingx2
Master Don Juan
sounds like she has a fetish
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.