Have known this girl a couple of months through mutual friends. We hit it off straight away and I knew she had high interest in me. Last friday we slept together and yesterday we had our first date. Now her birthday is this wednesday. Should I get her something or should I just call and wish her a happy birthday etc. I know she is into me but I am still playing the field;-) Anyway she is still to pass the DJ tests etc! So guys what should I do? My gut feeling is not a lot! I feel its far too early for soppy moments.
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Gifts?
- Thread starter Marco
- Start date
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
check_mate_kid_uk
Master Don Juan
get her somthing thoughtfull but cheap, do not spend a lot of money on her at this point
I wrote an article a while back on gifts for girls.
I have never had a positive experience giving a girl a gift. I went from #1 on their list to non-existent, all because i bought a gift.
I'm not sure how strong your game is, however i would suggest a happy birthday and then leave it at that!
I have never had a positive experience giving a girl a gift. I went from #1 on their list to non-existent, all because i bought a gift.
I'm not sure how strong your game is, however i would suggest a happy birthday and then leave it at that!
strong like bull
Senior Don Juan
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- Nov 5, 2002
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just out of curiousity, by "slept together" you meant "had sex," right? or did you literally mean, slept together in the same bed?
if youve already slept together and the idea of regular sex has been established, its not so bad to give her a gift. its one thing if youre giving a thoughtful gift to a girl youre ****ing; its another thing to constantly shower a girl with attention and gifts, hoping that one day she'll let you get a taste.
that being said, thoughtful is the ticket. something inexpensive and from the heart will go much further than an expensive, impersonal item. as an example, a while back i gave a gift to a girl id been seeing for a while. she always treated me with respect, cooked for me, bought me a pair of nice pants, bought me drinks, food, and just treated me like a king. the gift was not for her birthday or anything , either. no holiday. just a reward for her good behavior. it was something i thought of one day, and knew she would love it.
so what was the gift? a cd i burned, filled to the brim with our favorite love/slow songs. these were songs that we always happened to be listening to during our more intimate moments. songs that popped up on the radio, that we played on the jukebox at our favorite restaurant and others that each of us have personally enjoyed.
she loved it and if anything, it only increased her attraction.
-SLB
if youve already slept together and the idea of regular sex has been established, its not so bad to give her a gift. its one thing if youre giving a thoughtful gift to a girl youre ****ing; its another thing to constantly shower a girl with attention and gifts, hoping that one day she'll let you get a taste.
that being said, thoughtful is the ticket. something inexpensive and from the heart will go much further than an expensive, impersonal item. as an example, a while back i gave a gift to a girl id been seeing for a while. she always treated me with respect, cooked for me, bought me a pair of nice pants, bought me drinks, food, and just treated me like a king. the gift was not for her birthday or anything , either. no holiday. just a reward for her good behavior. it was something i thought of one day, and knew she would love it.
so what was the gift? a cd i burned, filled to the brim with our favorite love/slow songs. these were songs that we always happened to be listening to during our more intimate moments. songs that popped up on the radio, that we played on the jukebox at our favorite restaurant and others that each of us have personally enjoyed.
she loved it and if anything, it only increased her attraction.
-SLB
RogueWarrior
Don Juan
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I've had mixed experience with gifts. If you're not dating, more often than not, you don't get the reaction you're hoping for.
I'd say that you should have a sense as to how she feels about you. If she thinks of you as a friend, giving a gift will be pointless. You most likely won't get anything in return, gift or otherwise. If she's got potential, the right gift can make a difference.
Don't spend more than $100. Less will be more. Also, here's a way to show her that you pay attention and are aware. Think of something she might have mentioned months ago. Something that she might not buy for herself but might like to have.
Stay away from: Jewelry, Lingere, Stuffed Animals, Flowers. Food gifts are only well-received if the girl doesn't worry about her weight all the time. It's better to get something that doesn't have a distinct romantic connotation to it.
Also, wrap it yourself. Don't use a gift bag. Use real wrapping paper and do it yourself. She'll be impressed. And no mushy cards either.
Giving a gift can also give you a hint as to whether or not she's got potential. Here are two extremes: I gave a girl a Christmas gift. She made a donation in my name to a charity. Nnnnkaaaay.... The other extreme: I gave a girl something for Christmas that she mentioned months before. She was impressed that A) I remembered and B) that I wrapped it myself. This resulted in out first PDA. After I returned from holiday vacation, she gave me a belated gift.
Finally, don't have any expectations. She's not expecting a gift so you shouldn't expect anything in return.
I'd say that you should have a sense as to how she feels about you. If she thinks of you as a friend, giving a gift will be pointless. You most likely won't get anything in return, gift or otherwise. If she's got potential, the right gift can make a difference.
Don't spend more than $100. Less will be more. Also, here's a way to show her that you pay attention and are aware. Think of something she might have mentioned months ago. Something that she might not buy for herself but might like to have.
Stay away from: Jewelry, Lingere, Stuffed Animals, Flowers. Food gifts are only well-received if the girl doesn't worry about her weight all the time. It's better to get something that doesn't have a distinct romantic connotation to it.
Also, wrap it yourself. Don't use a gift bag. Use real wrapping paper and do it yourself. She'll be impressed. And no mushy cards either.
Giving a gift can also give you a hint as to whether or not she's got potential. Here are two extremes: I gave a girl a Christmas gift. She made a donation in my name to a charity. Nnnnkaaaay.... The other extreme: I gave a girl something for Christmas that she mentioned months before. She was impressed that A) I remembered and B) that I wrapped it myself. This resulted in out first PDA. After I returned from holiday vacation, she gave me a belated gift.
Finally, don't have any expectations. She's not expecting a gift so you shouldn't expect anything in return.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.