I've been doing a lot of cold approaches in the past few weeks. I was chatting with a girl and setting up a date when she suddenly told me that a friend told her I was doing this a lot. She said this was a bit too much for her and now I don't really know what to do. Any advice?
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backseatjuan
Banned
Double standard. As if she don't get approached on the street. She didn't like you and it was her way of shooting you down. Try raising your standards, if you approaching 6s, go for 7s and 8s.
In2theGame
Master Don Juan
Ask her, "What do you mean too much?" She will probably give you some B.S. excuse. But you let her know overall you don't know her yet and that's why you are going on a date just as im sure shes doing with other Men or at the very least entertaining conversations with other guys to set up dates with them. If she doesnt like it, She's out.
In2theGame
Master Don Juan
Also, This may be an indication that she's not THAT into you. I have been seen with other Women at bars, lounges or on the street by other Women I was seeing and they STILL wanted to see me, In some rare cases I even had to introduce them to one another. On a small scale I have had Women argue over me and I would still get with them. I got away with all of this because their interest in me was sky high.
What happens, IN HER MIND, is that she comes to see you as WORTHLESS simply because she hasn't had to INVEST anything in you in order to get you or to keep you.
You were an interesting diversion while she had nothing else to do. But now that someone a little more valuable has come along, someone who expects her to treat him very well, she'll have no problem at all dropping you or demoting you to lowly "friendship" status.
Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.
2Rocky
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1) You are over saturating an area with your spam approach. Women don't feel you are sincere.
2) Work on social circle approaches if you are in a limited circles. Build more comfort.
3) Be more discerning in who you approach. Take good shots. 2/3 is better than 2/10 both in basketball and meeting women
4) Dissatisfied customers do your reputations more harm than satisfied ones. The same is true for women.
5) If you are trying to get over approach anxiety, then strike up conversations with men. Same principles..
2) Work on social circle approaches if you are in a limited circles. Build more comfort.
3) Be more discerning in who you approach. Take good shots. 2/3 is better than 2/10 both in basketball and meeting women
4) Dissatisfied customers do your reputations more harm than satisfied ones. The same is true for women.
5) If you are trying to get over approach anxiety, then strike up conversations with men. Same principles..
I totally agree with you. I googled "spam approaching", read through this article and reconsidered my way of approaching girls. I usually run up in front of the girl / tap her on the shoulder and tell her that she looks really nice or friendly. Obviously I only say that when I mean it, but always using the same opener with the same approach is rather uninspired... So I guess the lesson here is to
1) try to make sure she is giving me IOI, maybe force eye contact by saying Hi first and only approach if she seems interested, and
2) use more situational openers rather than saying the same thing over and over again
But I'm still unsure about 2), because saying "I just had to come and say that you look really nice" feels really natural to say when it's the truth. If I see a cute girl walking down the street doing nothing unusual I can't for the life of me think of something special/funny to comment on. And it would seem even more insincere if I complimented her on something I don't really care about.