"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Get a girl to cry and she's yours

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st_99

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Generally.

Any chick that teared up over something I said or did REGARDLESS if we ever did anything, hooked up, dated or whatever was basically in love with me.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Mantis Toboggan

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There's some truth to that. The roller coaster of emotions can work. The rule I go by is: Make them love you or make them hate you.

Anything in between is where guys end up in the Friend Zone.
 
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Sabol

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True. But that only lasts so long. Eventually, those tears will dry up and their emotions will change. What happens next is what usually determines if it is real love or just plain lust.
 
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Johnnyventana

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True enough -- just be on the lookout for crocodile tears. Same rules, do not apply.
 
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Sabol

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Johnnyventana said:
True enough -- just be on the lookout for crocodile tears. Same rules, do not apply.
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Bingo.

I once got this girl to cry hard for me as I was walking out on her for showing disrespect. She didn't actually love me, she just had never actually been rejected by someone before.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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st_99

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yes, also true that if they cry one too many times, they're history.
 
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Maxtro

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And how do you get a girl to become emotional?

The girl I'm dealing with now just doesn't really react to what I do. She just doesn't care.

Of course I could say something really mean to her and get her mad at me, but I don't think that's what the OP is talking about.
 
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Sabol

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Maxtro said:
And how do you get a girl to become emotional?

The girl I'm dealing with now just doesn't really react to what I do. She just doesn't care.

Of course I could say something really mean to her and get her mad at me, but I don't think that's what the OP is talking about.
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If she doesn't care, walk.
If her interest level isn't high, then there is no point in pursuing anything further. You are just going to set yourself up for heartbreak.
 
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st_99

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Maxtro said:
And how do you get a girl to become emotional?

The girl I'm dealing with now just doesn't really react to what I do. She just doesn't care.

Of course I could say something really mean to her and get her mad at me, but I don't think that's what the OP is talking about.
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Right, the point of my post was more so just to point out a confirmation sign. If a chick doesn't get emotional whatsoever over you then her interest is low as f*ck. If she cries, thats great. If she yells at you, thats good too although not as good as the crying.
 
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Maxtro

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Thanks, so it can be a good interest level check, but not really a way to boost her interest.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Maxtro

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spinaroonie said:
The opposite of love isn't hate, it's indifference.
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That's very interesting.

It's pretty easy to switch between love and hate because they are both very strong emotions.

But Indifference is a complete lack of emotion.
 
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Sabol

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Maxtro said:
That's very interesting.

It's pretty easy to switch between love and hate because they are both very strong emotions.

But Indifference is a complete lack of emotion.
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Yep.

Always be careful of emotional slvts (or girls who just want an emotional rollercoaster) though. They're very fun and addicting, but they can drop you in a second.
 
bigneil

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Maybe if they cry over YOU they are yours, but if they cry over previous trauma they tell you about or over a movie you watch together, it's not the same.
 
bigneil

bigneil

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spinaroonie said:
The opposite of love isn't hate, it's indifference.
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One of the most fundamental premises of the DJ. The reason you should never react to their bad behavior in an emotional way. If you tell them off, it's like telling them you love them. Just act like you don't care. NC.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

M

MusicMan450

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bigneil said:
Maybe if they cry over YOU they are yours, but if they cry over previous trauma they tell you about or over a movie you watch together, it's not the same.
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Not true in all cases, but maybe mine is rare.

A girl that I tried to get with who was kind of a "hard-to-get" went on a date with me once, and we ended up just walking and talking. She started talking about her dying Grandpa, she was crying, and I just kissed her, and we ended up making out right there. That relationship was my first and longest, lasting about 1 1/2 years. I broke up with her last June and she still tells nearly every girl that I know how much she still loves me.
 
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One another

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Even though this topic is already out to date but still,

When a girl trying her hardest holding back for not crying infront of you because she is afraid and considered your feeling that you may will feel bad and despise her , but then you judged her effort saying she doesn't care or doesn't love the man then you push it to their end. what will happened if you finally seeing her explode and what will you do..??

"Run!!!! This girl is manipulative!!" Or
"****!! I love her.. I don't want to be the one that make her crying but...., we have to break up.. It's better for her.."

What a loser d*ck...

Jast say you don't love the girl from the start if you can not accept her the way she is.
If a man trully love a girl, isn't he have to make some effort to changing his own behavior..? Well.. Of course if the girl also love you back by willingly to work things out together.

Relationships should be mutual.
It wouldn't work if only one that willingly put their ego down and the other one being an *******. It's a torture!!

Geeezz.....
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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