I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Bingo.Johnnyventana said:True enough -- just be on the lookout for crocodile tears. Same rules, do not apply.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
If she doesn't care, walk.Maxtro said:And how do you get a girl to become emotional?
The girl I'm dealing with now just doesn't really react to what I do. She just doesn't care.
Of course I could say something really mean to her and get her mad at me, but I don't think that's what the OP is talking about.
Right, the point of my post was more so just to point out a confirmation sign. If a chick doesn't get emotional whatsoever over you then her interest is low as f*ck. If she cries, thats great. If she yells at you, thats good too although not as good as the crying.Maxtro said:And how do you get a girl to become emotional?
The girl I'm dealing with now just doesn't really react to what I do. She just doesn't care.
Of course I could say something really mean to her and get her mad at me, but I don't think that's what the OP is talking about.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
That's very interesting.spinaroonie said:The opposite of love isn't hate, it's indifference.
Yep.Maxtro said:That's very interesting.
It's pretty easy to switch between love and hate because they are both very strong emotions.
But Indifference is a complete lack of emotion.
One of the most fundamental premises of the DJ. The reason you should never react to their bad behavior in an emotional way. If you tell them off, it's like telling them you love them. Just act like you don't care. NC.spinaroonie said:The opposite of love isn't hate, it's indifference.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Not true in all cases, but maybe mine is rare.bigneil said:Maybe if they cry over YOU they are yours, but if they cry over previous trauma they tell you about or over a movie you watch together, it's not the same.
The true DJ waySo true. So for Netflix and chill dates we should watch Titanic lol
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.