El' Waynos
Don Juan
We were seeing each other, no she just wants to be friends.. no sex etc
whats the deal, will it work?
whats the deal, will it work?
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Friendship after sex.. possible?
- Thread starter El' Waynos
- Start date
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
girlsarecrazy
Senior Don Juan
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Hang out once, try to ride the ***** train again. If you can't get anything out of her. Then all you will be is a shoulder to lean on when shes upset and that's it!
Tomatoes
Master Don Juan
It can....But 99% of the time it wont. Depends how involved you were. If she was a FB. Yeah just friends work. If she was a full on LTR.....it will just be problematic. Have seen it work but my advice would be to give it a short try but not hold your breath when things get twichy. Then get her out your life.
Like Tomatoes said, an FB will work much better since no emotions were involved. I'm friends with two girls I fvcked and they both are pursung other guys. We still talk and joke about the past and it's easy because I didn't make the sex a big deal.
Tomatoes
Master Don Juan
Best test.....Imagine she is getting shagged by another bloke....does that make you uneasy? If so it prob wont work being friends.
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
girlsarecrazy
Senior Don Juan
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Exactly. Try and turn it around to an exclusive relationship or fvck another girl first before becoming friends again with this girl.Tomatoes said:Best test.....Imagine she is getting shagged by another bloke....does that make you uneasy? If so it prob wont work being friends.
ntdawg
Don Juan
It could definately work for her but women are different.
As discussed in a previous thread I'm in a similar siuation to you. What I'm doing is never acknowleging that we a just friends.
I spoon feed my attention to her and make sure that when ever we hang out it is one on one. I try to give her as little attention as possible though.
At the same time I date other women. I'm not actively close friends with her but not actively dating either. I'm just keeping her as a side project that I work on slowly.
I'm trying to win her back but I'm finding that it is a much harder process the second time around as she really has to see me in a new or fresh light to get out of that friend zone.
I think it can be done and someone on this board must have done it before but it is definately a long slow process. good luck.
I recommend not thinking about her though if you can win her back all good but I think it is a small chance.
As discussed in a previous thread I'm in a similar siuation to you. What I'm doing is never acknowleging that we a just friends.
I spoon feed my attention to her and make sure that when ever we hang out it is one on one. I try to give her as little attention as possible though.
At the same time I date other women. I'm not actively close friends with her but not actively dating either. I'm just keeping her as a side project that I work on slowly.
I'm trying to win her back but I'm finding that it is a much harder process the second time around as she really has to see me in a new or fresh light to get out of that friend zone.
I think it can be done and someone on this board must have done it before but it is definately a long slow process. good luck.
I recommend not thinking about her though if you can win her back all good but I think it is a small chance.
Why would you want to have her as a friend? So you can see some E! show, and learn more and more about your favorite celebrities? Or how about exchanging cooking recipes. Or talking about both of your romantic interests! Sounds like fun!!!
girlsarecrazy
Senior Don Juan
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You don't want to be the boyfriend that doesn't get any.
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Tomatoes said:Best test.....Imagine she is getting shagged by another bloke....does that make you uneasy? If so it prob wont work being friends.
Exactly.
El' Waynos
Don Juan
I guess, but I just think if I hang around as a friend there will be a time when I will get some sex again, she cant resist me and she knows it... she always comments that im "smooth" (thanks to sosuave)