El' Waynos
Don Juan
We were seeing each other, no she just wants to be friends.. no sex etc
whats the deal, will it work?
whats the deal, will it work?
"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
Friendship after sex.. possible?
- Thread starter El' Waynos
- Start date
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
girlsarecrazy
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 10, 2006
- Messages
- 240
- Reaction score
- 2
Hang out once, try to ride the ***** train again. If you can't get anything out of her. Then all you will be is a shoulder to lean on when shes upset and that's it!
Tomatoes
Master Don Juan
It can....But 99% of the time it wont. Depends how involved you were. If she was a FB. Yeah just friends work. If she was a full on LTR.....it will just be problematic. Have seen it work but my advice would be to give it a short try but not hold your breath when things get twichy. Then get her out your life.
Like Tomatoes said, an FB will work much better since no emotions were involved. I'm friends with two girls I fvcked and they both are pursung other guys. We still talk and joke about the past and it's easy because I didn't make the sex a big deal.
Tomatoes
Master Don Juan
Best test.....Imagine she is getting shagged by another bloke....does that make you uneasy? If so it prob wont work being friends.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
girlsarecrazy
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 10, 2006
- Messages
- 240
- Reaction score
- 2
Exactly. Try and turn it around to an exclusive relationship or fvck another girl first before becoming friends again with this girl.Tomatoes said:Best test.....Imagine she is getting shagged by another bloke....does that make you uneasy? If so it prob wont work being friends.
ntdawg
Don Juan
It could definately work for her but women are different.
As discussed in a previous thread I'm in a similar siuation to you. What I'm doing is never acknowleging that we a just friends.
I spoon feed my attention to her and make sure that when ever we hang out it is one on one. I try to give her as little attention as possible though.
At the same time I date other women. I'm not actively close friends with her but not actively dating either. I'm just keeping her as a side project that I work on slowly.
I'm trying to win her back but I'm finding that it is a much harder process the second time around as she really has to see me in a new or fresh light to get out of that friend zone.
I think it can be done and someone on this board must have done it before but it is definately a long slow process. good luck.
I recommend not thinking about her though if you can win her back all good but I think it is a small chance.
As discussed in a previous thread I'm in a similar siuation to you. What I'm doing is never acknowleging that we a just friends.
I spoon feed my attention to her and make sure that when ever we hang out it is one on one. I try to give her as little attention as possible though.
At the same time I date other women. I'm not actively close friends with her but not actively dating either. I'm just keeping her as a side project that I work on slowly.
I'm trying to win her back but I'm finding that it is a much harder process the second time around as she really has to see me in a new or fresh light to get out of that friend zone.
I think it can be done and someone on this board must have done it before but it is definately a long slow process. good luck.
I recommend not thinking about her though if you can win her back all good but I think it is a small chance.
Why would you want to have her as a friend? So you can see some E! show, and learn more and more about your favorite celebrities? Or how about exchanging cooking recipes. Or talking about both of your romantic interests! Sounds like fun!!!
girlsarecrazy
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 10, 2006
- Messages
- 240
- Reaction score
- 2
You don't want to be the boyfriend that doesn't get any.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Tomatoes said:Best test.....Imagine she is getting shagged by another bloke....does that make you uneasy? If so it prob wont work being friends.
Exactly.
El' Waynos
Don Juan
I guess, but I just think if I hang around as a friend there will be a time when I will get some sex again, she cant resist me and she knows it... she always comments that im "smooth" (thanks to sosuave)