MatureDJ
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 30, 2006
- Messages
- 12,749
- Reaction score
- 5,163
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
MatureDJ said:
Not true (in the sense you mean) and even if it was true (which it isn't). Men are built tougher anyway, with the intestinal fortitude, the physical and mental strength that women cannot even imagine, so logically it would work out about even.Unprez said:its true men have it harder and y we need to work harder
Actually, Dwayne's forehead should say "WE JUST DON'T GET IT, and stuff"( . )( . ) said:The words "WE JUST DONT GET IT" should be stamped on their foreheads.
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Ask yourself something: are you happy with who you are? Chances are you aren't. Don't think of it as working to win over women, think of it as working to make yourself into who you want to be. Women will be a by-product of your personal success.Unprez said:yea good point....woman are more social creatures as put by DJs here so makes sense.......but i always have that bitterness that men need to work so hard, that its not good enough to have a good heart or be a good person....u need to be ripped, make **** loads of money and have game and be popular etc and then after all that a girls expect that you be loyal to her only after she notices u after all the hurdles u go through.....
yes they will be. If guys actually liked themselves women would come naturally. They wouldn't have to force it. I realize this and this is the route I've chosen to go. Now when I get a negative thought about myself it pisses me off because it has no place.LeftyLoosey said:Ask yourself something: are you happy with who you are? Chances are you aren't. Don't think of it as working to win over women, think of it as working to make yourself into who you want to be. Women will be a by-product of your personal success.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.