Is it ever OK to get back in touch with an ex after some years? It ended pretty badly 3 years ago. We grabbed coffee once since to catch up and it was fine, but we are not in contact. I might be in the same city for a little bit soon and I was wondering what you guys thought about checking in with her?
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Ex of 3 years
- Thread starter popsickle
- Start date
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
JohnyTheArrow
Senior Don Juan
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Dignity > sex with ex
ChalengeGuyFan
Master Don Juan
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- Dec 5, 2008
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Getting back with an ex is like buying back your old car: same ride, same issues (probably more) and higher mileage.
Worth it ? You answer it.
Worth it ? You answer it.
ChalengeGuyFan
Master Don Juan
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Jokes aside, this is the jist of it.JohnyTheArrow said:
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Lozboss
Master Don Juan
NEVER GO BACK
If you still have feelings for her after 3 years then I'd worry you need to sort that first.
If you still have feelings for her after 3 years then I'd worry you need to sort that first.
soulforge
Master Don Juan
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Well i am currently banging my ex, who i was seeing 3 years ago..
The sex is good, but to be honest its a step backwards.. and she will always be a liability.. i will be dropping my ex very soon.. its never really worth it
The sex is good, but to be honest its a step backwards.. and she will always be a liability.. i will be dropping my ex very soon.. its never really worth it
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
SuckItUp
Senior Don Juan
The only time it's ok to go back to an ex is if the relationship ended for circumstances beyond either parties control and there wasn't acrimoy from either side. It's extremely rare for this to occur and even if those factors line up there's still a good chance that one of the parties has outgrown the other.
In your case the answer is no in terms of restarting the relationship.
In your case the answer is no in terms of restarting the relationship.