"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Does "No Contact" really work?

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Francisco d'Anconia

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My Name is Nobody said:
People want what they can't have there is no logical explanation behind it.
Dude that's a bit weak, even when guys say that about women. Women want guys that they can't have because it fills some need of theirs, it's no different with guys.
 
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Francisco d'Anconia said:
Dude that's a bit weak, even when guys say that about women. Women want guys that they can't have because it fills some need of theirs, it's no different with guys.

To tell you the truth, what I really want is to somehow still convert her into a plate. That would be the ideal situation! But I'm pretty sure that is impossible at this point unless there is a magic text message I can send to make her interested again, lol.

If anyone has a magic text message it would be you Francisco, so let's hear it lol. Or is this mission impossible?
 

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It's the ideal situation if you get off on drama. If you get off on drama, women who are all over the place emotionally, who like you one day and hate you the next, and keep you on your toes constantly wondering what the hell they are thinking or going to do next, if that excites you and makes you feel "alive" then yeah women who will do that are going to be the perfect situation. When women reject you and you are somehow able to keep pushing their buttons and you can both mess with each other's egos, and both go nuts together, boy it's great. It is quite stimulating. So stimulating it can keep you up nights and unable to concentrate or do much of anything because you're always waiting for the other shoe to drop.

I used to get off on that. It's taking time but I just need to leave that stuff behind me. I'm wondering what it's like to be with girls who treat you with respect and are good to you, and actually go out of their way to NOT mess with you because they know you'll shut them down in a heartbeat if they do. The fact that you're so strong inside is what turns them on. THAT might be the perfect situation for me. But I don't think it's the perfect situation if drama turns you on. Actually if drama turns you on, women treating you well probably will turn you off. And as a result of that, you probably won't attract women like that anyway.
 
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reset said:
It's the ideal situation if you get off on drama. If you get off on drama, women who are all over the place emotionally, who like you one day and hate you the next, and keep you on your toes constantly wondering what the hell they are thinking or going to do next, if that excites you and makes you feel "alive" then yeah women who will do that are going to be the perfect situation. When women reject you and you are somehow able to keep pushing their buttons and you can both mess with each other's egos, and both go nuts together, boy it's great.

I used to get off on that. It's taking time but I just need to leave that stuff behind me. I'm wondering what it's like to be with girls who treat you with respect and are good to you, and actually go out of their way to NOT mess with you because they know you'll shut them down in a heartbeat if you do. THAT might be the perfect situation for me. But I don't think it's the perfect situation if drama turns you on. Actually if drama turns you on, women treating you well probably will turn you off. And as a result of that, you probably won't attract women like that anyway.

How am I going to keep pushing her buttons? I haven't talked to her for almost 3 weeks. I still have the #, but I have no idea how to use it or if I should even think about using it. I don't care about the drama, I will never go AFC with her again that was my downfall.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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I don't know man. Like I said if you get off on drama the best way to do that is wonder if you should contact her and spend time considering if you should or not, and consider if maybe or maybe not you should get with her again, for a long time, never really deciding if you want to or not.

You can't say you're not into drama and still be considering something that's gonna invite drama! :rock:
 
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reset said:
I don't know man. Like I said if you get off on drama the best way to do that is wonder if you should contact her and spend time considering if you should or not, and consider if maybe or maybe not you should get with her again, for a long time, never really deciding if you want to or not.

You can't say you're not into drama and still be considering something that's gonna invite drama! :rock:

LOL, good point. So what should I send?
 

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Ha ha. I'm sure that was sarcasm.
 
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reset said:
Ha ha. I'm sure that was sarcasm.
Nah, I'm actually serious. I'll send her a message if we can think of something good. Come on, it's been 3 weeks. Why not?
 

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I was going to say, you should send yourself to.... drama rehab!
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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My Name is Nobody said:
Nah, I'm actually serious. I'll send her a message if we can think of something good. Come on, it's been 3 weeks. Why not?
I write for me mainly because as I write it helps to clarify what I'm learning, and hopefully get insights from other guys. Hopefully what I'm writing to you about you is at least considered by you. Seriously, re-read my post then wonder what my response would be about sending her a message after three weeks.

(also, after three weeks, if she's not trying to contact you, that's a sign she doesn't want to contact you)
 
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reset said:
I write for me mainly because as I write it helps to clarify what I'm learning, and hopefully get insights from other guys. Hopefully what I'm writing to you about you is at least considered by you. Seriously, re-read my post then wonder what my response would be about sending her a message after three weeks.

(also, after three weeks, if she's not trying to contact you, that's a sign she doesn't want to contact you)

Just a funny text message, it's not like I'm harassing her. What's the harm in that? She would probably like it.
 

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:flowers:

=

:cry:
 
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reset said:
:flowers:

=

:cry:

Is it really that bad? I'm think i'm the type of guy who needs closure on things, maybe I need to work on that.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

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you: :wave:

her: :kick:

you: :mad:

her::rolleyes:

you: :cuss: :cuss: :cuss:

her: :crackup:

you: :cry:

her: :crackup:

lol. Fun with smilies. Talk to you later.

(ps. she gave you closure "never want to see you again". You already got it.)
 
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reset said:
you: :wave:

her: :kick:

you: :mad:

her::rolleyes:

you: :cuss: :cuss: :cuss:

her: :crackup:

you: :cry:

her: :crackup:

lol. Fun with smilies. Talk to you later.
I LOL'd!
 

MikeEdward1973

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My Name is Nobody said:
Is it really that bad? I'm think i'm the type of guy who needs closure on things, maybe I need to work on that.
I think the only thing you can do is wait for a lot of time to pass, and maybe call her in like 3 months.

I've been in your shoes, and blown it (badly) with someone I really liked with too many AFC moves. Only thing I did that worked was wait for a lot of time to pass, and then reach out to her again. Her interest level may rise if you walk away for a long period of time, but I mean much longer than 3 weeks.

I'd wait till like...April.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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Francisco d'Anconia said:

LOL!!!!!!! I'm doing alright buddy, i'm feeling pretty good right now. Not much desire to contact this woman anymore. I'm basically head over heals for this other girl. If anything changes, you guys will be the first to know but I found a girl I seem to be compatible with. At least for the time being, as long as I keep paying for dinner.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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