Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.
I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.
Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.
These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
I know a couple of monks who have extremely interesting lives but I would hardly describe them as outgoing. More proof that it's all subjective.Charm&Style said:besides living an interesting life it also depends on how outgoing one is.
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
You plan on limiting the myriad of interesting things life has to offer to only the next four years of your life? WHY???!!!Master Bates said:No, I don't. And I'm trying to think of ways to change that before my 20s are gone forever....
These are things that I wanna do also.speakeasy said:2) Backpack trip in S. America
3) Go to carnival in Brazil
4) Buy a motorcycle
5) Learn to play guitar(I used to take lessons a looooong time ago). Maybe get back into my saxophone and jam with some of my jazz playing buddies.
6) Maybe, just maaaaybe start competing in martial arts tournaments if I get good to that point. But not sure about this one.
7) Learn how to salsa dance really well
10) Start reading more books on a wide variety of interesting subjects(makes for better conversations).
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Um...Francisco d'Anconia said:I know a couple of monks who have extremely interesting lives but I would hardly describe them as outgoing. More proof that it's all subjective.
I don't know about killing yourself, lol, but this was a pretty interesting post. I've never thought about that. Would I like to know when I was going to die. When you put it this way, I think I would like to know. You would approach your entire life completely differently. Any bullsh*t that wastes your time, you will cut out and focuse in on what you really consider fullfilling.6-heads lewis said:kdnash, what do you do that involves so much travel?
i wrote this yesterday and submitted to imatternot.com:
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...imagine if a doctor told you today that you have 1 year to live... imagine how great that year would be. I wish I knew exactly when I was to die, so I could enjoy my time until death without worry about the future. Instead im just another corporate bozo in a marketing firm preaching about efficiency, sales pitches, communication and customer service. im selling useless crap to idiots.
...instead of living 5 exhilirating, adventurous years and then dying, im stuck living another 50 boring, predictable, numb years, at which point im senile and can't control my bladder.
...everyone is so concerned with buying a bigger house, bigger car, and getting celebrity autographs? for what? you're all fukn pathetic, and im just as pathetic for not knowing how to change.
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to answer your question, my life is very uninteresting and unfulfilling. Ive often contemplated creating a timeline, lets say 5 years, to blow all my money and live recklessly, at which point I kill myself. id become a professional fighter, gambler, porn star, sperm donor, whatever. take massive bank loans, travel, etc.
most of the great film rebels die soon, which is why it is so hard to follow in their footsteps. I would rather be brad pitt from fight club, or kevin spacey in american beauty, or ghost dog, for 1 year than live my life for the next 50, BUT, in all likelihood i wont be dead in 1 year, and living that lifestyle just makes you homeless and unemployable. none of the great heroes had to live with the consequences of their lifestyle. I would assume James Dean often died in his movies.
THATS MY DILEMMA! it seems suicide is the only answer, or putting yoruself in a situation that guarantees an eventual death.
LOL, good one... Y'know, you end up meeting a wide variety of people when the Dalai Lama comes to town (I've seen the 14th speak twice).Luthor Rex said:Um...
Were you hanging out at the "monk bar" when you met them???
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Seriously, where did you meet up with monks? Also, do tell what's interesting about their lives.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.