Theminatar
Don Juan
How would I know if I'm depressed? Or simply down?
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
I only have 1 question for Tolle.n00bPimp said:Thinking too much leads to depression. I always feel for guys like you because I was once there. Anyways do yourself a favor and watch this. Also research Eckhart Tolle.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aeaWC6y0jFc
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Your future is determined by your present actions, thus; you can determine your future without resisting the moment.Theminatar said:I only have 1 question for Tolle.
How am I supposed to determine my future if I don't constantly think about it?
@Bible_Belt:
I sort of think that way, I look at the dark side of everything, I say what's the point in trying because I'm going to fail anyways. Also a lack of motivation.
Idk..
You're wise for a 15 year old.NorwegianDJ said:Your future is determined by your present actions, thus; you can determine your future without resisting the moment.
You must adapt a new mindset. It's a self-fulfilling prophecy. If you think you're gonna fail, then you'll probably fail.
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Deep stuff though, it makes sense.Theminatar said:You're wise for a 15 year old.
Many people believe that thinking about their future is the same as planning for it. Its not the same thing. You can plan for your future and make a contingency plan in case something doesnt work out. Thinking about your future involves dwelling on the possibility of the negative outcome (aka. failure). This thought of failure overpowers you in the long run and you will end up dropping your plans and failing. You only fail when you give up.Theminatar said:I only have 1 question for Tolle.
How am I supposed to determine my future if I don't constantly think about it?
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Stop what your doing right now and just stand back and observe your feelings. You'll quickly realize that you really have no problems right now at this moment.Theminatar said:How would I know if I'm depressed? Or simply down?
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.