Theminatar
Don Juan
How would I know if I'm depressed? Or simply down?
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Depression
- Thread starter Theminatar
- Start date
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Chickfight
Senior Don Juan
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I'm not expert, but when people are down they come here and write a huge essay, wallowing in self-pity.
Those two short, unmotivated sentences do seem depressing.
In any case, here is not the place to should be to get diagnosed.
Those two short, unmotivated sentences do seem depressing.
In any case, here is not the place to should be to get diagnosed.
Thinking too much leads to depression. I always feel for guys like you because I was once there. Anyways do yourself a favor and watch this. Also research Eckhart Tolle.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aeaWC6y0jFc
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aeaWC6y0jFc
Bible_Belt
Master Don Juan
Depression is constantly asking yourself "what's the point?" when faced with every small task in life. If it seems that everything is pointless, then you are probably depressed.
Theminatar
Don Juan
I only have 1 question for Tolle.n00bPimp said:
How am I supposed to determine my future if I don't constantly think about it?
@Bible_Belt:
I sort of think that way, I look at the dark side of everything, I say what's the point in trying because I'm going to fail anyways. Also a lack of motivation.
Idk..
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
I see that you are 17. I know it may not feel that way now, but it might be a phase. Or it could be more serious. Best to see a professional regarding these things. The #1 most important thing when determining whether you have a mental 'disorder' is the "... and affects every day life to the point of being detrimental" criterion. Remember that.
Theminatar
Don Juan
It doesn't affect me so much to the point my life is ruined, but i does give me a bad outlook to life in general. Makes me feel like **** for a week straight.
NorwegianDJ
Master Don Juan
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Your future is determined by your present actions, thus; you can determine your future without resisting the moment.Theminatar said:
You must adapt a new mindset. It's a self-fulfilling prophecy. If you think you're gonna fail, then you'll probably fail.
Theminatar
Don Juan
You're wise for a 15 year old.NorwegianDJ said:
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
insanewrestler123
Don Juan
Deep stuff though, it makes sense.Theminatar said:
Many people believe that thinking about their future is the same as planning for it. Its not the same thing. You can plan for your future and make a contingency plan in case something doesnt work out. Thinking about your future involves dwelling on the possibility of the negative outcome (aka. failure). This thought of failure overpowers you in the long run and you will end up dropping your plans and failing. You only fail when you give up.Theminatar said:
Eckhart Tolle teaches you to quiet your mind because this allows you control of your thoughts. When you don't let thoughts control you, and instead YOU CONTROL your thoughts, they will work for you. Since thoughts will always manifest themselves, you will control the things that manifest into your life. Whereas before you were not able to control your thoughts, and therefore were not able to control the things that manifested in your life.
Theminatar
Don Juan
But taking control is the hardest part.
Soyoushave
Don Juan
look for the DSM-IV classification of depression 
What troubles you? Something specific?
Nevertheless whatever it is, don't think too much about it and especially don't stress about it. If you won't make it worse by over-thinking, analyzing etc. it will go away in 2 months at most. If it gets worse or it won't go away, you probably need a medication to help you out.
Whatever you are stressing about is not a big deal....it just seems like it because your brain is in stress mode. So don't worry. Try to eat well and hydrate, take some vitamins avoid narcotics and alcohol and make slight effort to keep it cool.
Don't be afraid. It's gonna be just fine.
Nevertheless whatever it is, don't think too much about it and especially don't stress about it. If you won't make it worse by over-thinking, analyzing etc. it will go away in 2 months at most. If it gets worse or it won't go away, you probably need a medication to help you out.
Whatever you are stressing about is not a big deal....it just seems like it because your brain is in stress mode. So don't worry. Try to eat well and hydrate, take some vitamins avoid narcotics and alcohol and make slight effort to keep it cool.
Don't be afraid. It's gonna be just fine.
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
I guess, it is quite scary to realize you have your life in your own hands and your decisions will affect your life.
Try to trust the driver. You won't crash it, man, come on. Make some practice runs before you start speeding on a highway but otherwise you will be just fine.
It is fine to plan and prepare but it is also important to just apply the 'fvck it, it won't kill me' attitude.
It is in your genes. Your ancestors did well and so will you. You can even do much better.
Try to trust the driver. You won't crash it, man, come on. Make some practice runs before you start speeding on a highway but otherwise you will be just fine.
It is fine to plan and prepare but it is also important to just apply the 'fvck it, it won't kill me' attitude.
It is in your genes. Your ancestors did well and so will you. You can even do much better.
KarmaSutra
Banned
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If you're thinking to yourself, "I wish I would've done __insert inconsequential bullsh!t__ another way."
If you're looking back, you're not focused on the possibilities ahead.
If you're looking back, you're not focused on the possibilities ahead.
powpow
Senior Don Juan
depression leads to lower testosterone levels which leads to less *****, which leads to more depression.
snap the **** out of it.
when I find myself getting depressed, I do something I like. Then I feel better. If you try this and it doesnt work, then maybe you should talk to people who are not way too suave, e.g. church person, psychologist.
actually prostitutes listen really well too.
snap the **** out of it.
when I find myself getting depressed, I do something I like. Then I feel better. If you try this and it doesnt work, then maybe you should talk to people who are not way too suave, e.g. church person, psychologist.
actually prostitutes listen really well too.
Stop what your doing right now and just stand back and observe your feelings. You'll quickly realize that you really have no problems right now at this moment.Theminatar said:
Your basically looking at your outside circumstances, if you foreseeable future in the next week, next day, 2 hours from now or 5 minutes looks favorable then you feel great. But if it looks bleak or uncertain then you will feel depressed or down.
The best thing to do is to forget about the future, let go of the past and focus on being happy right here, and right now.
NorwegianDJ
Master Don Juan
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- 2,553
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Remember that its human nature to want to stay in your current emotional state.
As humans are concious of the conciousness itself; so we can break free of this, and decide what mood we want to be in; right NOW. Just smile. Just laught.
You dont laught because you're happy; you're happy because you laught.
Also realize that the essence of human freedom lies in the fact that unlike other creatures, man is self-aware, which means that we decide how we respond to any stimulus.
This means that all these things that you may think are either good or bad, are neither. You choose how you view things in your life. Are they gonna be problems, obstacles, or cheerleaders?
Just my .02
As humans are concious of the conciousness itself; so we can break free of this, and decide what mood we want to be in; right NOW. Just smile. Just laught.
You dont laught because you're happy; you're happy because you laught.
Also realize that the essence of human freedom lies in the fact that unlike other creatures, man is self-aware, which means that we decide how we respond to any stimulus.
This means that all these things that you may think are either good or bad, are neither. You choose how you view things in your life. Are they gonna be problems, obstacles, or cheerleaders?
Just my .02
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.