"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Chilli bunnies on crack

seanconnery

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No, not really, but here's a chat log, beginning to end:

B: you know, you're a bit more transparent than you think you are
A: :-o
A: sounds too acme.
B: what sounds too acme
A: last i checked photons still bounce off me.
A: but please, continue.
B: i'm sure you know what i mean
A: mmm?
B: oh? you dont'?
B: don't believe that for a second.
A: i hope you don't think i'm a homo.
B: heh no i dont. you're too homophobic!
B: and oh well,i'll let you figure it out if you havent already
B: gonna go now
B: cyaa

I'd been going real heavy c/f on the victim earlier that night at a school event, and I pulled a "I think you're hanging around after class to get a chance to talk to me" earlier this week. Contact has been sparse - no more than a hi every few days in RL, and I'm rarely on IM.

Seems like she's just trying to throw the game back in my face, but I'm not sure. First time someone's done this - I'm not quite sure how to react, or if to react at all. Might try to bring it up come next week and lure her into the subject again and brush it off immediately with a "Bah, you and your sick sexual fantasies."

Anyone have a better idea?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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ShizamDaMan

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...

I don't see any C+F in that convo. I don't even know who's who.
 

seanconnery

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A = me
B = her

Was tired, and she'd popped on and caught me at a bad time. The convo was on IM, mind you.

I'm pretty ****y, if not funny, in person. Still working on the humor bit.
 

Smooth as Anything

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No more ****ing AIM logs, thank you.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Ballistik

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She's saying you shallow. Go into the HS Bible and find Matrix's post on why ****y and Funny isn't the be-all end-all of how to act. I think it's exactly what you need to hear.
 

Porky

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FVCK AIM.

IT'S USELESS.

YOU CAN'T PICK UP WOMEN OVER IT.

STOP POSTIN LOGS.
 
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