"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Carry an Umbrella

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Don Juan
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you make an excellent point about being prepared.....
to that end, I'd rather give my d!ck an umbrella for when she squ!rts on me.
if you know what i mean :D
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

Bible_Belt

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My line would be something like "Hey!...You should really get an umbrella!!!" and then just continue to walk next to her with the umbrella only over myself. The hotter she is, the funnier the joke is. If she actually gets it and runs up to join you, that is the type of girl I would want to talk to anyway. And I wouldn't mind at all holding an umbrella for a girl, provided I get to rip on her the whole time. "Oh sure, get a man to provide for you, some feminist you are. :D " Obviously, this is all done in a friendly and joking way. If the girl looks like she's about to start crying when you first talk to her, she didn't get the joke. And obviously if anyone needs help, you should still offer. Even if it's a little old lady. Your frame is that you're really a great guy, and that's the joke of pretending to be a jerk.
 

HalfAddict

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sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Make a ***** bag and put it in the trunk next to the emergency road signs, signal flares and a week worth of rations?
 

Atom Smasher

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Umbrella usage has a lot to do with geographical location. Here in the NYC area, it's perfectly acceptable. It might be less so out west. I would imagine that they're downright illegal in Texas.

Ahhhh.... but the top hat, now that's universal. What woman could resist?
 

zengame

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Better to not have an umbrella and open a women who has one. Once was out with a wing and we opened two younger girls that way and turned it into a instant date.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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BowTie

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I can't tell if half the people are joking or just don't understand the concept. OP I like the idea a lot. Instead of an "umbrella" it's more of a metaphor for being dependable in situations of adversity. Always being secure, women like security right?

Incident happens - response is "NO worries I got this". Great tip.
 

sarcastic sam

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BowTie said:
I can't tell if half the people are joking or just don't understand the concept. OP I like the idea a lot.
Well I can't tell if half the people posting on this thread are joking or just don't understand the concept either, but why the fvck are so many people bothering to comment.. like any other tip in the tips section like fvck either do it, or don't who cares
 
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