"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Buffers

The Bat

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Rollo Tomassi said:
I should also add that it's this very facility that makes women hate it (when they do). Porn gives a guy his reward for free; a reward that should be her single best agency is rendered valueless when a man can get off to an infinite variety of sexual experience at the click of a mouse. It's unlimited access to unlimited sexual availability.
Hmm, interesting. I can see how if you are seeing somebody, using "I love porn and will continue to enjoy it even if we are together" tactic can get you an upper hand in the relationship.

But I thought women hated their men watching porn because it was another form of cheating? I guess that's what you're trying to get at there.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Rollo Tomassi

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BAT, the idea that a man viewing / using porn is equitable to infidelity is a feminine operative convention - namely shame. Women masturbating is liberating or empowering, if not downright sexy. A man masturbating is failure, perversion and vile. Why do you suppose that is? What would be the latent function or purpose of this social convention? It reinforces women's sexuality as being a prize to be sure, but if men can (and regularly do) achieve that same prize (or can simulate it well enough) her sexuality as a commodity becomes devalued. Therefore male self-pleasuring deprives her of her first best agency with men.

Thats from the feminine side of the equation. The Buffer for men is that by chronically masturbating and rewarding himself solo, he loses the motivation to learn the social skills necessary to interact successfully with women.
 

MatureDJ

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Latinoman said:
There is no way I could out DJ a man in his 40s or 50s for the attention of a woman in her 40s. Heck, it is very difficult to out DJ a man in his 40s for a woman in her mid 30s. Although, I can out DJ them (men in 40s+ and 20s) for women in their upper 20s and 30s. It is what it is.
Tell you what, you don't have to worry about a 45 y.o. man like me competing against you for the mid 30's women. I'll go for the young 20's. :yes:
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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