"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Beware the Springtime BPD re-emergence

Atom Smasher

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Just got my "Happy Springtime" e-mail from my last BPD of 2 years ago, complete with about 12 pictures attached.

I deleted those, and last night I got the expected accompanying text message with another pic attached.

"I understand if you don't get back to me..." LOL, I'm glad she understands.

Be wary. They can pop up like tulips in Springtime when a young' man's fancy is vulnerable after a long Winter. Delete and move on.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

Read more...

Neon Owl

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Happy springtime? lol
How often does she contact you since the breakup? And how long have you been NC?
 

ArcBound

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Threads like these about old exes always remind me why a lot of men seek virgins. If a woman gets a taste of that alpha guy, some part of it is forever on her mind. Of course maybe some women do legitimately get over their exe's but the more guys she dates and sleeps with the more chances she will be pyscho when she reaches you. akin to roissy's chart about number of partners vs divorce rate. In the sexual marketplace we are not only competing for her in the present but also with her exes.
 

j0504s

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Springtime is here bpds have abandonment fears. Ty for this smasher this is a good reminder for everyone b.c the main reason a lot of us came to ss was to heal and move on. Don't regress!!! +1
 

Atom Smasher

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Neon Owl said:
Happy springtime? lol
How often does she contact you since the breakup? And how long have you been NC?
After the breakup she blew up my phone for a good six months, then dwindled off very slowly over the next 6. So I've been NC for those two years with her being NC for a little less than a year.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Who Dares Win

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ArcBound said:
Threads like these about old exes always remind me why a lot of men seek virgins. If a woman gets a taste of that alpha guy, some part of it is forever on her mind. Of course maybe some women do legitimately get over their exe's but the more guys she dates and sleeps with the more chances she will be pyscho when she reaches you. akin to roissy's chart about number of partners vs divorce rate. In the sexual marketplace we are not only competing for her in the present but also with her exes.
Agree with that, if a woman gets enough attention from a real alpha and then he drops her, she is emotionally fvcked forever, she experienced the thrill of having an alpha so can tell the difference, plus he fvcked up her ego which is like glue for women when it comes of relationships.

The result for the poor guy who get such girls is what we see in any shopping mall, a pissed off middle aged woman walking frustrated by her husband walking 10 feet beyond her with her shopping bags.

And even more sad is that nobody told to that poor man that the more he tries to win her over, the more she will resent him.

@Atom, tell us the truth old man, aint you satisfied and flattered by being chased even if she is not a girl you want now?
 

Atom Smasher

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No, because I view it as mental illness, and it's a bit scary in a way because you never know what they're going to do.
 

Atom Smasher

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Most definitely. Once I was driving with my BPD and I VERY mildly spoke to her about some inappropriate behavior (any other girl would have readily accepted it and agreed with my reasonable comment), and I saw her turn into a raging 13 year old right before my eyes. I could tell that she was considering hitting me, and was right on the verge. She stepped out of the moving car LOL and walked down the street to her house.

You never know what's brewing in that mind, what demons she's attempting to rein in. A hallmark of BPD is lack of self-control, always manifesting in frequent slightly-disturbing behaviors until the massive disturbing behaviors show up.

They are truly sick, severely damaged people, and in fact almost universally unrepairable, and that's why guys like 5string and myself sound the warning occasionally.

The power they conjure up over men is astounding. On the day I got my "Happy Springtime" message, I felt internally disturbed for the rest of the day. I wasn't thinking about it all day, mind you... The contact simply stirred up the mud and it had to settle, which it did by the next day.

Anyway, Happy Springtime everybody!! :flowers:
 

5string

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Atom Smasher said:
Most definitely. Once I was driving with my BPD and I VERY mildly spoke to her about some inappropriate behavior (any other girl would have readily accepted it and agreed with my reasonable comment), and I saw her turn into a raging 13 year old right before my eyes. I could tell that she was considering hitting me, and was right on the verge. She stepped out of the moving car LOL and walked down the street to her house.

You never know what's brewing in that mind, what demons she's attempting to rein in. A hallmark of BPD is lack of self-control, always manifesting in frequent slightly-disturbing behaviors until the massive disturbing behaviors show up.

They are truly sick, severely damaged people, and in fact almost universally unrepairable, and that's why guys like 5string and myself sound the warning occasionally.

The power they conjure up over men is astounding. On the day I got my "Happy Springtime" message, I felt internally disturbed for the rest of the day. I wasn't thinking about it all day, mind you... The contact simply stirred up the mud and it had to settle, which it did by the next day.

Anyway, Happy Springtime everybody!! :flowers:
You watch your six Atom.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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