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Die Hard

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Honestly if a guy has such a low view of women it’s going to seep out and she will pick up on it. Why the hell would a decent woman want to be with a bitter man when she could be with one who isn’t bitter?
As you responded to Roober's mininterpretation of me, I assume you're applying the above to me. Which is a mistake.

But I can see how it comes in handy to think of me as that guy, so you can use me as a means to propogate your views... So if it makes you feel better to misinterpret me, go ahead.
 

samspade

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This is going to sound very anti-Guru1000, but all you need to do is show them egoless love.

Have NO agenda. Just enjoy them as they are in whomever they are. Don’t judge. Accept them and they will be more loyal to you than you can ever
imagine.

A lot of people ask how I forge my girls into troopers?

Do I command them? Do I sell them a false bill of goods? Do I pretend to be someone or something I’m not? Do I them how much money I make or flex my bicep?

No none of that.

I just show them egoless love without need for reciprocity. Without expectation, rules, or agenda.

They feel totally free in my space. They cannot reject me as I’m not asking for anything for which to reject. Get it?

They FEEL bliss in my presence and so become loyal by default. They are a reflection of you so if they are rejecting a certain part of you, they are rejecting that part of themselves which they don’t want <===read that again

So give them the part of themselves that they do want.

If your failing with women, th biggest reason is your vibe. They FEEL you want something from them. No one wants to feel obligated and thus their aversion.

Release all needs when you’re out with them and enjoy the NOW with straight egoless love. Not in a feminine, gay way but a masculine, non-needy, DGAF, giving vibe and I promise you, you will see a huge inversion in how they respond to you.
Hall of Fame post. I just downloaded it into my bloodstream.
 

Die Hard

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This is going to sound very anti-Guru1000, but all you need to do is show them egoless love.

Have NO agenda. Just enjoy them as they are in whomever they are. Don’t judge. Accept them and they will be more loyal to you than you can ever
imagine.

A lot of people ask how I forge my girls into troopers?

Do I command them? Do I sell them a false bill of goods? Do I pretend to be someone or something I’m not? Do I them how much money I make or flex my bicep?

No none of that.

I just show them egoless love without need for reciprocity. Without expectation, rules, or agenda.

They feel totally free in my space. They cannot reject me as I’m not asking for anything for which to reject. Get it?

They FEEL bliss in my presence and so become loyal by default. They are a reflection of you so if they are rejecting a certain part of you, they are rejecting that part of themselves which they don’t want <===read that again

So give them the part of themselves that they do want.

If your failing with women, th biggest reason is your vibe. They FEEL you want something from them. No one wants to feel obligated and thus their aversion.

Release all needs when you’re out with them and enjoy the NOW with straight egoless love. Not in a feminine, gay way but a masculine, non-needy, DGAF, giving vibe and I promise you, you will see a huge inversion in how they respond to you.
Here's the contradiction, though. I am able to adopt the mindset you described when I'm just looking for sex. What the hell do I care about women's behavior when basically the only behavior I'm looking for is that she bends over, right? So yeah, it works in that case...

But when you actually prefer to have a meaningful, stable relationship with a woman, you obviously expect a lot more from her behavior and her character. So when that is the underlying motive in the back of your mind when you go out and meet women, you certainly will judge them a lot harder, you will be disappointed and many times disgusted when women show behavior that doesn't allign with your expectations. And yes, you obviously will have expectations of them, since you're looking for a girl who can offer something more than just sex! And yes, when you have those expectations, they obviously will FEEL you want something from them!

Now perhaps they will feel obligated because of this and thus experience aversion towards you. But this really just disqualifies her as a good fit for you, right? She just disqualified herself for being "girlfriend material". The problem is, as soon as I realize that, my second thought is: "Oh well, let's forget about that possibility. She does look freakin hot and it would be awesopme to bang her brains out!" But by then, that's not gonna work anymore. She already feels judged, she already noticed somehow through my behavior that I've "disqualified" her when I was judging her through my "girlfriend material" lens...

Ideally, a guy should be able to be fluid and agile with his mindset. When you see a woman and observe that she has good qualities, it is okay to "activate" the mindset within you where you prefer to have a meaningful and stable relationship with a woman, and expect a woman to have the needed qualities for that.
But when you see a woman and observe that she has very few of those qualities, you should "switch off" that mindset, coz she obviously won't meet your requirements, you'll be disappointed with her, she'll notice that through your behavior and not feel attracted to you. So you could have sex with her if you "switch off" that attitude.

My problem is, I cannot switch from one mindset to the other or have no mindset at all. I either go out with the mindset that I prefer a good woman who can offer me something more than sex, or I go out wih the mindset that I just want to bang girl's brains out.
In the first case, I mess up my chances with all the horny chicks who I could potentially have sex with (because I'm disappointed with their behavior, they feel judged etc.)
In the second case, I mess up my chances with the "quality" girls because I come off as a player who just wants to bang their brains out, lol.

The trick should be not to have any predefined attitude when going out and meeting women and simply adjusting your attitude according to who is in front of you. But is that even possible? Can you do that, guru1000?

Furthermore, why is it that you live the life of a player? You come across as a guy who "has it all" and should be able to catch a great quality woman who you can have a stable, fulfilling relationship with. But you don't have that... Now I can guess that you'll say you don't have time for that or even that you don't WISH to have a stable LTR because you have other priorities in life. But is that really the case or is it just the way you justify the fact that you don't have a stable LTR, so you won't feel bad about it?
 
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AJ84

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As you responded to Roober's mininterpretation of me, I assume you're applying the above to me. Which is a mistake.

But I can see how it comes in handy to think of me as that guy, so you can use me as a means to propogate your views... So if it makes you feel better to misinterpret me, go ahead.
I see that you clarified and added more info so I incorrectly assumed. My apologies. Thanks for clarifying.

I’m wondering if your approach and the ability to switch it on and off depends on the venue? Screening for potential quality gfs in hook up settings or online may be a futile attempt for example.

Where do you usually meet girls?

Guru does seem to have some good advice on how to be fluid depending on the situation and can hopefully post something that’s helpful.
 

Die Hard

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I see that you clarified and added more info so I incorrectly assumed. My apologies. Thanks for clarifying.

I’m wondering if your approach and the ability to switch it on and off depends on the venue? Screening for potential quality gfs in hook up settings or online may be a futile attempt for example.

Where do you usually meet girls?

Guru does seem to have some good advice on how to be fluid depending on the situation and can hopefully post something that’s helpful.
Thanks for being genuine in your response.

Ah, I think the problem lies more within myself than it is dependent of the venue (although that also is of importance).

I am unbalanced and seem to switch from one extreme to the other. Sometimes, I firmly decide for myself that I want a quality woman and I embrace that attitude 200%, I totally dedicate myself to it. Which sets me up for a lot of disappointment, coz most women simply aren't what I consider quality women. After a while, I lose energy and give up on the effort....

IN THE MEANWHILE, I see hot women giving me a lot of indicators of interest! But since they are not quality women and that's what I'm looking for, they will see from my body language etc. that I have judged them as "not worthy". So they feel aversion to me as a response.

Then I think to myself: "You idiot! You could've fvcked all those women if you played your cards right! So give up on finding a quality girl, you won't find her anyway. Better be a player and just go for sex!!"

And just like I did with the first attitude, I will now fully dedicate myself to being a player and banging girls' brains out. And I do have success (as in: banging girls) then. But with each girl that I fvck, I can't help thinking: "How great would it be if on top of the great sex, you'd have other qualities that made you a good match for me to be in a stable relationship with!"

So then I switch to the first attitude again and want nothing to do with all these hoes.

And so the cycle repeats again and again, basically all my life. I can't find peace with it, I can't find balance...
 

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AJ84

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Thanks for being genuine in your response.

Ah, I think the problem lies more within myself than it is dependent of the venue (although that also is of importance).

I am unbalanced and seem to switch from one extreme to the other. Sometimes, I firmly decide for myself that I want a quality woman and I embrace that attitude 200%, I totally dedicate myself to it. Which sets me up for a lot of disappointment, coz most women simply aren't what I consider quality women. After a while, I lose energy and give up on the effort....

IN THE MEANWHILE, I see hot women giving me a lot of indicators of interest! But since they are not quality women and that's what I'm looking for, they will see from my body language etc. that I have judged them as "not worthy". So they feel aversion to me as a response.

Then I think to myself: "You idiot! You could've fvcked all those women if you played your cards right! So give up on finding a quality girl, you won't find her anyway. Better be a player and just go for sex!!"

And just like I did with the first attitude, I will now fully dedicate myself to being a player and banging girls' brains out. And I do have success (as in: banging girls) then. But with each girl that I fvck, I can't help thinking: "How great would it be if on top of the great sex, you'd have other qualities that made you a good match for me to be in a stable relationship with!"

So then I switch to the first attitude again and want nothing to do with all these hoes.

And so the cycle repeats again and again, basically all my life. I can't find peace with it, I can't find balance...
How do you feel about doing a bit of both? Having a FWB arrangement (with the understanding that they know it’s just a casual thing, there are some girls who are fine with that and you don’t have to dedicate alot of your time on being with her), while continuing to screen for quality girls?

If you go in knowing she’s a FWB, then you don’t expect much, will not invest much and hence will not be disappointed while also enjoying the no strings sex.

That could free up your positive energy and emotions for what you really want, rather than being disappointed with the lower quality girls and potentially carrying a bit of a hopeless view with you when screening other girls.

Does that make sense I’m not sure if I’m explaining that well. I can see how feeling disappointed by lower quality girls can make one feel like there are no decent girls out there.
 

guru1000

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Furthermore, why is it that you live the life of a player? You come across as a guy who "has it all" and should be able to catch a great quality woman who you can have a stable, fulfilling relationship with. But you don't have that... Now I can guess that you'll say you don't have time for that or even that you don't WISH to have a stable LTR because you have other priorities in life. But is that really the case or is it just the way you justify the fact that you don't have a stable LTR, so you won't feel bad about it?
Yes you are correct. I was not able to keep a high-end quality girl, at least not in the way I wanted her to be. I've been married, engaged a handful of times, and tons of LTRs.

I don't post advice because I have done everything right. In fact in my life, I have done everything wrong. I faced atrocities I wish upon no one. It is precisely because I have done everything wrong and learned what not do that I post here.

Yes these LTRs I mentioned above all failed. Not because they left. Not because they lost attraction for me. They failed because all I did in those relations was TAKE in place of GIVE. I didn't give them any value or love other than being present in my human attributes (LMS). The only giving I made was my outward value of physicality and financial success (or financial drive when my success hadnt yet manifested) which led to the initial attraction but failed in the context of a meaningful connection needed for a successful LTR. I was able to attract but not to keep.

I was a vacuum of love and value. I took everything but gave no intrinsic value back. This created resentment in all of them, which led to disrespect and arguments, and well, the end.

It was precisely because of these experiences, that I felt the need to change something in myself. That I needed to stop being a vulture for their value and at least to try to give some value and egoless love back without the need for reciprocation. To freely give myself fully with the vulnerability that they may not give back. To give egoless love means to give love without expectations in return (the ego). This was very difficult to do at first. But I started with small value gives and slowly built the momentum in this opposite pendulum.

When I started to do this, I noticed something very different in their responses to me. Their egos literally eviscerated (no matter how hot they were) before my eyes, and I was able to connect with them as they were without pretenses or defenses. It was here in this "zone," that I was able to deeply bond with them and build meaningful connections. Even if I didn't find them physically appealing to my normal standard, I bonded with them, spent time with them, enjoyed their company, and forged extreme loyalty. In this zone, I operated fully from my EGOLESS self which was unreactive, not demanding, free of expectation, required no validation--whereas the EGO self needed all of that. It was here that I made and understood that distinction between my two competing halves: my EGO and EGOLESS self, whereas the EGO strived to take, the EGOLESS self strived to give.

Most of my life, I was governed by the EGO half, which is apparent in most of my writings. This is the wrong way to be. I can assure you as I've been there and I didn't like the results nor the deep dark places it took me.

Don't go into this "mission" taking like vulture. Surrender that half and align with the other half and I can assure you, your EXPERIENCE (not just with women) will change.
 

highSpeed

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Hall of Fame post. I just downloaded it into my bloodstream.
Of course you want something from them, otherwise, why would you be there? Whether it is company, companionship, money, kids, sex, you come together because you find that person to be suitable/acceptable/favorable to the types of things that you want to do. You spend time with that person determining whether or not, especially before you get serious, whether or not you want to continue doing those activities with that person. It goes both ways, she's doing the same thing.

However, there are key differences between men and women. Men, generally more loyal, it's hardwired into us. Men, generally more sacrificing as it relates to their significant other and kids, if any. Men, generally willing to put up with more crap and stick it out. Says a lot that after no fault divorces came onto the scene that 80% of first time divorces are initiated by women.

But make no mistake about it, and you're right that there is no obligation but to pretend that either one of you is not with the other person for something that you get out of the relationship, or at least, what you hope to get out of the relationship, is not being realistic or even honest with yourself.

I know that guru is trying to sound like he's full of wisdom but this is a fluff post at best. Or, let me content, he's actually meaning something else, which is outcome independence. Hey, if she stops putting out, taking care of me, doing things for me, I'm moving on because I don't care because I can always score another chick. So what she would not be feeling at that point, is neediness and trying to force the feelings/interaction on his part. She enjoys that vibe because while it may not be true pressure for her, there is an unspoken understanding between the two of them that if he sees, she does something he doesn't like, he's out. This makes her naturally want to do more, be better and work harder, even if she doesn't consciously recognize it.
 

Spaz

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Yes you are correct. I was not able to keep a high-end quality girl, at least not in the way I wanted her to be. I've been married, engaged a handful of times, and tons of LTRs.

I don't post advice because I have done everything right. In fact in my life, I have done everything wrong. I faced atrocities I wish upon no one. It is precisely because I have done everything wrong and learned what not do that I post here.

Yes these LTRs I mentioned above all failed. Not because they left. Not because they lost attraction for me. They failed because all I did in those relations was TAKE in place of GIVE. I didn't give them any value or love other than being present in my human attributes (LMS). The only giving I made was my outward value of physicality and financial success (or financial drive when my success hadnt yet manifested) which led to the initial attraction but failed in the context of a meaningful connection needed for a successful LTR. I was able to attract but not to keep.

I was a vacuum of love and value. I took everything but gave no intrinsic value back. This created resentment in all of them, which led to disrespect and arguments, and well, the end.

It was precisely because of these experiences, that I felt the need to change something in myself. That I needed to stop being a vulture for their value and at least to try to give some value and egoless love back without the need for reciprocation. To freely give myself fully with the vulnerability that they may not give back. To give egoless love means to give love without expectations in return (the ego). This was very difficult to do at first. But I started with small value gives and slowly built the momentum in this opposite pendulum.

When I started to do this, I noticed something very different in their responses to me. Their egos literally eviscerated (no matter how hot they were) before my eyes, and I was able to connect with them as they were without pretenses or defenses. It was here in this "zone," that I was able to deeply bond with them and build meaningful connections. Even if I didn't find them physically appealing to my normal standard, I bonded with them, spent time with them, enjoyed their company, and forged extreme loyalty. In this zone, I operated fully from my EGOLESS self which was unreactive, not demanding, free of expectation, required no validation--whereas the EGO self needed all of that. It was here that I made and understood that distinction between my two competing halves: my EGO and EGOLESS self, whereas the EGO strived to take, the EGOLESS self strived to give.

Most of my life, I was governed by the EGO half, which is apparent in most of my writings. This is the wrong way to be. I can assure you as I've been there and I didn't like the results nor the deep dark places it took me.

Don't go into this "mission" taking like vulture. Surrender that half and align with the other half and I can assure you, your EXPERIENCE (not just with women) will change.
I 2nd this line of thought.

That's a good one guru.
 

brixlingo

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I've dated plenty of girls over the years and I sometimes look them up on social media. So many of them are now settling down, getting married, living together, having kids and all that. It's so funny to see that the great majority of them have the exact same type of guy that they're settling down with: He looks like a weakling, very kind and sweet, a softy, often even a bit nerdy, the exact opposite of "badass". In other words, a beta...

You can see how this guy will always say "Yes, dear..." when she puts the pressure on him. He will never be able to deal with her emotional storms, he'll just respond to those by NOT putting up a fight and letting her have her way, instead of standing up for himself and putting her in her place. He's the perfect victim, she will have him in her control and he'll provide her with a carefree life.

When I see this, I realize that pretty much none of the girls I dated in my life would've been a fit for me in the long term. I gotta say, it's a bit depressing. It seems you're either the guy she wants to fvck or you're the guy she wants to have a stable, long term relationship with (but it requires you to be a loser!). So I guess I really am better off giving up on a LTR and just pursuing sex instead. Yet, I can't make that transition, it just feels hollow and pointless just to pursue sex and never having a great connection where you and her really complement each other's lifes and can build something stable.

Sometimes I do try to push myself to that attitude. I just give up on the hope that a woman can be more than a cvm dumpster... But when I adopt that mindset, it shows through my behavior. The girls realize that I just see them as a cvm dumpster and therefor will not give themselves up to me. They want me to really "like" them. But I don't lol... I think they're disgusting with all their arrogance, their hypergamous habits, their treacherous and manipulative ways, their double standards and hypocrisy etc. So no, I don't like them! I just want to fvck them coz they don't deserve anything more than that... But when they realize this is the way I feel about things, obviously they won't co-operate haha!

So the trick is to act as if I do like them, I guess? I have a hard time with that... I wish I could find a girl who's worthy of being more than a cvm dumpster, so each time I meet a girl who isn't that, I'm disappointed and I just can't hide it. I tell myself "Oh well, she's another worthless piece of shyt, but she does look hot so let's just try to fvck her" But because deep down I'm disappointed, I cannot act convincingly as if I like her. Actually, I just can't have genuine fun and enjoy a girl when I notice that she's just another superficial, untrustworthy, treacherous, arrogant, hypocritical piece of azz. They often notice this, and then pull away.

In the past, I was foolish and thought many girls were nice and sweet, not aware that it's all just a facade. So I really liked them and could genuinely act that out, therefor they liked being around me. Thus, I got laid a lot more! Nowadays, I see through their facade and I simply don't like them anymore, so I don't genuinely act like that either and therefor they don't like being around me.

I wish I somehow could really let go of my disappointment, so it wouldn't hold me back from smashing all the girls around me, lol. But how can I let go of my disappointment without letting go of the expectation that fuels the disappointment? Should I really give up on the idea that I can find someone who's good for me in the long term? Someone I could settle down with? To think that this is not possible makes me depressed and nihilistic, makes me wanna give up on women altogether. Furthermore, if brainless sex with no connection or no hope for anything else is all that remains.... Then why go through all the effort of texting, dating blahblah that is needed to get the sex? Seems like a big investment with a small reward. I'd rather watch porn and use my right hand, that's a whole lot easier!

I just feel stuck and caught in without seeing a way out.
IF you have high value girls will fight over you. Choose the best out of the bunch. But you have to get over the fact that girls have a lot of sex.
 

Roober

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Horseshyt.

I don't describe all women as disgusting. I describe disgusting women as disgusting.
I was merely suggesting based on the context of your original post. I also didnt say you think all women are disgusting, try reading that again.

Regardless though, you definitely have some bitterness towards women thereby inhibiting your ability to really bond with them. This could be a product of a poor childhood (as it is with most people), poor relationships in the past, or too much time on SS. This place manifests bitterness for the majority of men here due to the inundation of similar ideology with very limited contradictory views.

You've reached the high mileage status, which often results in an unrealistic ideal of perfect mate. People are flawed. People make mistakes. You cant approach a situation with expectations because they are fluid, highly variable, and far too nuanced to have a strict policies for certain behaviors.

If you cant find a decent woman with good morals, and standards for herself, then you should seriously examine the man in the mirror.
 

Desdinova

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I just give up on the hope that a woman can be more than a cvm dumpster... But when I adopt that mindset, it shows through my behavior. The girls realize that I just see them as a cvm dumpster and therefor will not give themselves up to me.
The women who are cvm dumpsters are the ones who have already been used up by other men. In other words, it's 99.9% of women over the age of 25.

You know how I feel about most women? I feel sad. There's some really cool women out there who are fun to be with, have some excellent talents, and are very attractive. Unfortunately, they're completely ruined because they've been fvcked by too many men, and I don't necessarily mean emotionally abused. Women are biologically capable of being committed to only one man in their lifetime. The more men they're with, the more corroded their ability to pair bond becomes.

Dating women over the age of 25 for the purpose of pair-bonding is pointless. Dating childless over the age of 30 is volunteering as a sperm bank donor.

There's an extremely small window in a woman's life where a man can actually acquire her as a committed, loyal and respectful companion. You need to seek them out by not dating old pieces of trash.
 

Paradiddle

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I do see kind of a solution to the problem by going for women who are below your Sexual Market Value. They show me respect, they are nice, they are honest, I can have good conversations with them, they are genuine, they're not hypocrite, I can connect with them (but don't want to, lol). That's basically what Desdinova went for too and he's quite happy with his relationship.
That's a complete false assumption, if you ask me. Going with a woman who is below your SMV will make you feel like an ass someday and realize that you are superior in so many ways that you could have been with anyone you'd have wanted to be with. I am speaking out of my personal experience.

Years ago I started to date a girl who was below my SMV. Every friend of mine thought that I was a chump because I gave up so easily and had to settle for the worst because I lacked confidence. Then that very girl started becoming confident as I was with her (not bragging but I was better looking) and then she started to take me for granted. From the moment I started dating that girl, amazing girls started showing up in my life. Funny how the universe works. What you resist persists and when you don't give much attention to something, it shows up in your life. Girls are girls. Doesn't matter if she's a 10/10 or a 5/10, all of them are going to treat you like **** one day or another.

P.S. Just speaking about my experience. I know you have already mentioned that you don't want to connect with them.
 
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highSpeed

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The women who are cvm dumpsters are the ones who have already been used up by other men. In other words, it's 99.9% of women over the age of 25.

You know how I feel about most women? I feel sad. There's some really cool women out there who are fun to be with, have some excellent talents, and are very attractive. Unfortunately, they're completely ruined because they've been fvcked by too many men, and I don't necessarily mean emotionally abused. Women are biologically capable of being committed to only one man in their lifetime. The more men they're with, the more corroded their ability to pair bond becomes.

Dating women over the age of 25 for the purpose of pair-bonding is pointless. Dating childless over the age of 30 is volunteering as a sperm bank donor.

There's an extremely small window in a woman's life where a man can actually acquire her as a committed, loyal and respectful companion. You need to seek them out by not dating old pieces of trash.
These are truly words to live by. I can't stress this enough. I would also add to it that you also have to qualify her upbringing and family as a part of this as well. So very few partners and a great family environment are key. Very few women fit these criteria unfortunately so while your 99.9% seems like it would be high, I think you are right on the money.

See this is the part that most people don't consider and I know for sure most, if not almost all women would disagree, men recover from poor upbringing and family situations much easier. You can have a guy that grew up in a less than optimal family situation and still turn out pretty decent, especially if he works at it.

Women, they don't recover very easily from a bad family situation, almost all of them do not. Their mental and emotional makeup seem to make it extremely difficult for them to turn into a decent adult. Do not take this into account at your own peril.

So combining the body count that women stack up as young adults and poor family upbringing, it's highly unlikely that you will run into a woman who is truly worth combining forces with. I suppose if you are well off, it doesn't matter as much but if you are a young guy who's trying to turn your life into something special, tying your wagon to a damaged woman (and most of them are to some degree) can be extremely damaging to your future.
 

greatsnake

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Man, I agree! The girls that I’ve banged are now in the same stages of life that you mentioned. When I look through their social media, their partners look like whimps and seem like they are willing to put themselves down.
women really do smell the difference between the beta and alpha. I’ve enjoyed all these years, chicks leaving their boyfriends to Fvck around with me, banging chicks from the bar. However, it has become just pointless sex

I’ve realized that it’s all in the mentality. From looking at chicks as s3x objects to looking at them as people. Just because you want something stable, it doesn’t mean that you have bend over. The chick that you click with or pursue, you can still lead.

The other thing that I’ve thought is that maybe that right chick hasn’t appeared in my life lol.
 
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markfromeurope

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Yes you are correct. I was not able to keep a high-end quality girl, at least not in the way I wanted her to be. I've been married, engaged a handful of times, and tons of LTRs.

I don't post advice because I have done everything right. In fact in my life, I have done everything wrong. I faced atrocities I wish upon no one. It is precisely because I have done everything wrong and learned what not do that I post here.

Yes these LTRs I mentioned above all failed. Not because they left. Not because they lost attraction for me. They failed because all I did in those relations was TAKE in place of GIVE. I didn't give them any value or love other than being present in my human attributes (LMS). The only giving I made was my outward value of physicality and financial success (or financial drive when my success hadnt yet manifested) which led to the initial attraction but failed in the context of a meaningful connection needed for a successful LTR. I was able to attract but not to keep.

I was a vacuum of love and value. I took everything but gave no intrinsic value back. This created resentment in all of them, which led to disrespect and arguments, and well, the end.

It was precisely because of these experiences, that I felt the need to change something in myself. That I needed to stop being a vulture for their value and at least to try to give some value and egoless love back without the need for reciprocation. To freely give myself fully with the vulnerability that they may not give back. To give egoless love means to give love without expectations in return (the ego). This was very difficult to do at first. But I started with small value gives and slowly built the momentum in this opposite pendulum.

When I started to do this, I noticed something very different in their responses to me. Their egos literally eviscerated (no matter how hot they were) before my eyes, and I was able to connect with them as they were without pretenses or defenses. It was here in this "zone," that I was able to deeply bond with them and build meaningful connections. Even if I didn't find them physically appealing to my normal standard, I bonded with them, spent time with them, enjoyed their company, and forged extreme loyalty. In this zone, I operated fully from my EGOLESS self which was unreactive, not demanding, free of expectation, required no validation--whereas the EGO self needed all of that. It was here that I made and understood that distinction between my two competing halves: my EGO and EGOLESS self, whereas the EGO strived to take, the EGOLESS self strived to give.

Most of my life, I was governed by the EGO half, which is apparent in most of my writings. This is the wrong way to be. I can assure you as I've been there and I didn't like the results nor the deep dark places it took me.

Don't go into this "mission" taking like vulture. Surrender that half and align with the other half and I can assure you, your EXPERIENCE (not just with women) will change.
I wanted to comment on this post before.

I think this is exactly how the man should behave -you cannot subdue feminism oraz feminists by disregarding them openly, you cannot lower someone's defences to 0 by showing off your player side all the time - real DJ, true man knows that he will pay more bills in the relationship and its ok with him - true man knows that woman is only as good and romantic as he makes her to be by his own behaviour.

Phuckboyz won't get it. They are in this closed loop of "No worthy woman around-phuck-only-material" while in fact you cannot really care about someone if you first don't feel any attraction on psychological level towards this person.

That's why IDGAF about spinning plates - my knowledge about psychology, my own experience and stories like this one show that it's a huge waste of time unless new pu.ssy every couple of weeks is of the utmost importance to you - and if it is, don't cry about women being of no substance, just after your resources if you alone are just after sex with them.

If you are just after sex with them because you feel that they are not worth anything more then it means that your core values are in fact moulded by hypergamy - which means female values overwrote your values. Pretty much that's what happens with DJ's with red pill rage in their eyes.
 

Die Hard

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Just some reflections...

When I was younger, I was a nice guy. As I got older, I became more of a cynical bastard.

When a person gets treated like shyt by people around him and gets hurt a lot, he will become harsher, less sensitive to the feelings of others etc.

I guess both of them are inside of me. The nice guy and the harsh guy. Sometimes one has the upper hand, other times the other has the upper hand. But I want to be neither of them, instead I want to be the combination of them. Or at least be able to be somewhere on the spectrum between them. Which is a challenge I've been trying to overcome all my life.

I believe this reflects in my dealings with women. As most of us, I've been burned hard by girls when I was young and naive. I became more of a jerk and then I had "succes", meaning I scored hot chicks. But all of them were the typical hot-but-superficial girls. Poor character, childish, unreasonable, very unfair in the way they treat you. You need to treat them unfairly in order to prevent that they treat you unfairly. Kill or be killed, in a sense.

Obviously, none of them were suitable for a serious relationship. Very high sex appeal, physically top material, but character-wise worthless material...

I have a high libido and they'll always attract me. But it takes a lot of effort to catch them and when I have them, I feel empty, coz there's nothing there besides the physical attraction.

I encounter good girls too. I know there could be something more between them and me. But I never open myself up to them. I always find flaws in them physically. They lack sex appeal, they act too intellectually or too boring, they don't cause sparks inside me. But I think that's just a subsconcious defense mechanism of mine... I guess deep down I don't want to open up to anyone, afraid to get hurt blahblah. Subconcsiously, I know I'll keep the brakes on my emotions when dealing with the hot and superficial girls. I guess deep down, I know I won't settle down with them or open myself up to them emotionally. So it's kinda safe....

Likewise, I think deep down I know that a good girl will get me to open up to her and eventually make me assume a more emotionally vulnerable position. I think that's why I always look for (and find) some flaw about them which makes me "reject" them.

I dunno, too many reflections, it's time to go to the gym and be a primitive ape, lol. Some of what I wrote maybe right, some of it maybe wrong. But I feel like the process of writing down these reflections will bring me further.
 

Kotaix

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You need to call out women on their ****. All their drama is just a giant **** test, and they want you to call them out and be dominated. Let them know you see right thru their crap and that you still like them for it. Being red-pilled means that you're aware of their ****, use it to your advantage.

My mom often tells the story that she fell for my dad because she told him to leave and he just left instead of groveling at her feet like every other boyfriend she'd ever had. They've been married 40 years now. All it took was one moment of frame control by him to show her he wasn't going to put up with her ****.
 

Machine10033

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I recently was on a guys trip with a bunch of my buddies. They are all married and I am not. As soon as we met a group of girls I seemed to get ambushed immediately! Your 38... you have never been married... why!!???? My response was because society is a ****ing joke and there are certain criteria I require before I risk losing everything I’ve worked for. I told these girls that my partner needs to sign a pre nup, we are to have completely separate bank accounts and assets, she needs to be extremely physically attractive and continues to maintain that, she needs to do all the cooking and cleaning, I will do my own laundry, she needs to maintain her sex drive and let me live my life and pursue all my hobbies without nagging. One girl nearly slapped me..... that’s how faked society is right now. Females expect you to cater to them, care for them, spend your money on them, get them flowers, and at any moment they can up and leave with half your cash but if you expect them to give a **** about you... it’s disgusting. All men need to take a hard stance and stay away from trash. If you find that girl... the one that does all of the above... she deserves your attention but good luck !
 

AttackFormation

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she needs to be extremely physically attractive and continues to maintain that, she needs to do all the cooking and cleaning, I will do my own laundry,
What do you do for her in return? And are you extremely physically attractive?
 
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