Pierce Manhammer
Moderator
Let it go, James Bay
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
"The Hunter" is an awesome song.Easily the most underrated rock/metal band of the 80s.
You can add:
Kiss of Death--about getting AIDS
Tooth and Nail--"Crushed all the hopes and the dreams we once had just to watch them fall"
The Hunter--"Searching for the things that I might never find....again"
Prisoner-- "chained by love!"
Heaven Sent--"but baby you're not the one!"
So Many Tears--"like so many things, we were lost forever"
Their entire catalog is almost exclusively FU b*itch songs.
Back for the Attack was an awesome album too.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
I walk the same discipline. lick my wounds real quick and keep moving. like pac said "MOB" money over b!tchesWhen I experience a loss, I don't like to listen to sad sh!t. Instead I listen to hustle music and motivational stuff. Songs that remind me that b!tches ain't **** and I need to focus on building my empire. Big Sean, Drake.. etc. If I actually am genuinely depressed, I try to focus the sadness into anger, and put on some brutal death metal or something.. and then I go work out. Sitting around sulking accomplishes nothing.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
I don't know where the members of Dokken met women. That band had a lot of songs about getting wronged by women on their two biggest albums "Tooth and Nail" and "Under Lock and Key"
Dokken's 2 biggest albums were "Tooth and Nail" (1984) and "Under Lock and Key" (1985).Easily the most underrated rock/metal band of the 80s.
Their entire catalog is almost exclusively FU b*itch songs.
Pink Floyd has some great break-up classics. "Mother" is a classic post-breakup feel good song. "Brain Damage" is also great:I don't really know about breakups, but at the moment I feel terrible, horrible and have a broken heart. At the same time I discovered Pink Floyd and the more I listen to it the better I feel.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.