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Been married for 3 months, wife does not want to consumate marriage

norm

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Hello,

I recently got married and took a honeymoon
with my wife.

During our honeymoon, my wife made sure that
we had two separate beds, and each night of the
honeymoon, we slept on separate beds.

I asked her why she would do this, and her response
is "is that all you think about?" and she would get upset.
For the sake of not arguing, I agreed to this ordeal.

Some background, I have been a virgin before
I got married, and now, I am still a virgin, 3 months
after my marriage.

My wife, does not want to consummate the marriage.
3 months later, we have moved into a house together
and now, living together, and we still sleep on separate
beds.

I do not want to bring this up with
the wife again, or she will get upset.

What should I do?

What can I do?
 

mangotot

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LOL...Did you have an arranged marriage where there was little communication before the marriage.

Reeks of troll-dom.
 

norm

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mangotot said:
LOL...Did you have an arranged marriage where there was little communication before the marriage.

Reeks of troll-dom.
we dated first, and then decided to get married
 

mangotot

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norm said:
we dated first, and then decided to get married
I'd say this is a post by a guy for laughs. Or by a girl for whatever reason.

Too many holes in the story.

sex not discussed when dating.

Sorry - I don't buy it.
 

What happens, IN HER MIND, is that she comes to see you as WORTHLESS simply because she hasn't had to INVEST anything in you in order to get you or to keep you.

You were an interesting diversion while she had nothing else to do. But now that someone a little more valuable has come along, someone who expects her to treat him very well, she'll have no problem at all dropping you or demoting you to lowly "friendship" status.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Masculinity

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I am officially in troll town. The only other "green" guy is Sideways :crackup:
 

nyc123

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well if you are serious...

if you are in a sexless marriage in that she won't ever have sex with you, i suggest you get a divorce. or if you must stay with her (for whatever reason), you should cheat on her.

you, of course, reasonably want to have a marraige with a wife who you have sex with.
 

VladPatton

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Porn all day, son, porn all day!
 

norm

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When we were dating, we discussed saving ourselves until marriage.
I was a virgin a time and I still am a virgin. I had no problem with that. But, I became very suspicious on our wedding night when she told me she wanted to sleep in separate beds.

She gets really upset whenever I bring it up and I am afraid I could lose her if I bring it up again. Maybe there could be a nice way to bring it up without arguing.

She says it is selfish to bring up such nonsense and that I am a bad husband if I bring it up ever again.
 

Tictac

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As rare as it is, you do once in a long while hear about women that don't believe in pre-marital sex.

I have NEVER heard of a woman that doesn't believe in post-marital sex.

What is there to lose? All you have is a roommate with license to take half your stuff by virtue of a marriage license.

Under most state divorce laws, an unconsummated marriage can be annulled.
 

norm

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Tictac said:
As rare as it is, you do once in a long while hear about women that don't believe in pre-marital sex.

I have NEVER heard of a woman that doesn't believe in post-marital sex.

What is there to lose? All you have is a roommate with license to take half your stuff by virtue of a marriage license.

Under most state divorce laws, an unconsummated marriage can be annulled.
The other thing is that she is in the United States on a temporary work visa. Which makes me suspicious now. Is she only using me a for a green card? It is very unusual for couples not to consummate their marriage, but I also have a close friend who's been married for 12 years, and he is also a virgin, so it might be more common than we think.
 

SmooveMooves

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These red posters are getting out of hand.

No human can possibly be so naive.
 

norm

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Should I confront her and tell her unless we start behaving like a normal couple we will get divorced?
 

backseatjuan

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Have a talk with her. Ask her why she married you? Tell her that you are disappointed in her as a wife BECAUSE she is not being your wife. Ask her if it is only for papers and you not interesting to her.

Then divorce if nothing changes.


Honestly if you have a perfect woman you would ask anyone for advice, you son married someone else's wife.
 

What happens, IN HER MIND, is that she comes to see you as WORTHLESS simply because she hasn't had to INVEST anything in you in order to get you or to keep you.

You were an interesting diversion while she had nothing else to do. But now that someone a little more valuable has come along, someone who expects her to treat him very well, she'll have no problem at all dropping you or demoting you to lowly "friendship" status.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

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