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Back on the prowl after 14 month monogamy. Seeking the missing keys

SargeMaximus

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One thing I will say is that it seems to me when a girl says “use me however you want” she really means “use me how I want you to use me” which is discouraging since I want girls who want me to use them how I want not how they want necessarily
 

DonJuanjr

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I was going to say, maybe say something like "I'll prove it to ya, meet me at so and so". But then that is qualifying to her. You could reframe that and go with something like "Or am I the lucky one?" When she replies yes, then say "Prove it, meet me at so and so". This way she is qualifying to you. I don't know though... I have no experience with old chat.
 

SargeMaximus

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I was going to say, maybe say something like "I'll prove it to ya, meet me at so and so". But then that is qualifying to her. You could reframe that and go with something like "Or am I the lucky one?" When she replies yes, then say "Prove it, meet me at so and so". This way she is qualifying to you. I don't know though... I have no experience with old chat.
Yeah it’s too qualifying to me. I wanted her to take the bait and try and say “why?” Then I would flip it and say “ladies first;)” and then get her to tell me why I should date her. Too complex maybe
 

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Blacksheep

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My ex told me she was attracted to me because I was there for her in a tough time. I also moved really fast with her on the dating app and got her to invite me over.

I remember how it went down and it definitely wasn’t seductive or pua.
As for the hot girls. No idea man. Seems no matter what I say these girls don’t respond well.
I spotted a masochistic girl and opened her online by saying things like “be my slut” or “be my plaything” and it rarely works too.

mice noticed
Masochistic girls want a guy who will constantly put them in their place and that is not something I want because I’m too lazy.
The thing with hot girls and even ones that are not that hot is that there is too much guy validating them and constantly hitting them up.

So it can be a bit frustrating, even having a good game idk if it can work well.

That's why I'm trying to invest my time into women who doesnt have a lot of followers on social media... Cause it can be a bit easier to build some deep connection.

That thing happening on social media seems to inflate our egos, for women maybe its more intense than for men. So this fact may explain why its hard to get a good response.
 

SargeMaximus

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The thing with hot girls and even ones that are not that hot is that there is too much guy validating them and constantly hitting them up.

So it can be a bit frustrating, even having a good game idk if it can work well.

That's why I'm trying to invest my time into women who doesnt have a lot of followers on social media... Cause it can be a bit easier to build some deep connection.

That thing happening on social media seems to inflate our egos, for women maybe its more intense than for men. So this fact may explain why its hard to get a good response.
I’ve never messaged a girl on Instagram, I just meant a girl of that physical hotness
 

Blacksheep

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I’ve never messaged a girl on Instagram, I just meant a girl of that physical hotness
Yep, but it might be a good idea to check on how she behaves on social media. That can tell a lot about her.

You don't have to hit her on there... Just check those things. Cause even if you don't do that, if she is the one who use it a lot... Chances are that she is getting a lot of validation in there.
 

SargeMaximus

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Yep, but it might be a good idea to check on how she behaves on social media. That can tell a lot about her.

You don't have to hit her on there... Just check those things. Cause even if you don't do that, if she is the one who use it a lot... Chances are that she is getting a lot of validation in there.
Yeah but what does it matter how she behaves?
 

Blacksheep

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Yeah but what does it matter how she behaves?
It matters because those can be signs on how she will behave with you. Like the so called "Red Flags".

Since you get that pattern you can spot that earlier, then save your time spending it with women that would show a high interest in you.

Unless you enjoy the challenge of trying to seduce a woman that doesn't show any interest in you.
 

SargeMaximus

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It matters because those can be signs on how she will behave with you. Like the so called "Red Flags".

Since you get that pattern you can spot that earlier, then save your time spending it with women that would show a high interest in you.

Unless you enjoy the challenge of trying to seduce a woman that doesn't show any interest in you.
Well it’s a fine line because I can get 5’s and 6’s without having to try very hard, but I want 7’s and up. So while I don’t enjoy a challenge of trying to seduce a woman, I have no choice in that I have to Improve my game somehow to get hotter girls
 
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Blacksheep

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Well it’s a fine line because I can get 5’s and 6’s without having to try very hard, but I want 7’s and up. So while I don’t enjoy a challenge of trying to seduce a woman, I have no choice in that I have to Improve my game somehow to get hotter girls
Yep!

And there might be a solution to that... Just keep learning and improving. =)
 

SargeMaximus

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Yep!

And there might be a solution to that... Just keep learning and improving. =)
I’ll figure it out on my own. But I gotta say I’m disappointed since you came in here all gung ho
To help but ended up just giving me a pat on the back. Not cool.
 

Blacksheep

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I’ll figure it out on my own. But I gotta say I’m disappointed since you came in here all gung ho
To help but ended up just giving me a pat on the back. Not cool.
Actually, I really wanted and tried to help you. I shared my experiences and my thoughts to you that I thought it would be useful. But I didn't give you any assurance that it would be useful for you. You are responsible to decide whether it makes sense or not. Not me.

As you explained to me, I understood that the path you're trying to go is not a path I went in my life... So I can't help with that.

I also gave you some keys that could help you find a way on that: Fantasy, patterns, understanding their behaviors. This can help, but its only a key... You have to open the door.

Are you really disappointed, or are you only projecting your frustration into others?
 

SargeMaximus

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Actually, I really wanted and tried to help you. I shared my experiences and my thoughts to you that I thought it would be useful. But I didn't give you any assurance that it would be useful for you. You are responsible to decide whether it makes sense or not. Not me.

As you explained to me, I understood that the path you're trying to go is not a path I went in my life... So I can't help with that.

I also gave you some keys that could help you find a way on that: Fantasy, patterns, understanding their behaviors. This can help, but its only a key... You have to open the door.

Are you really disappointed, or are you only projecting your frustration into others?
Ok well thanks for the effort but it wasn’t what I was looking for. Too vague, not practical imo. It’s unfortunate but is what it is.

for me, what helps is practical stuff things like “when you said X in text you lost her because of Y” things like that. An understanding and specific practical application.

“watch out for red flags” and then not even saying what those red flags could be, is not helpful to my specific autistic brain.

But I appreciate the intention.
 

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DonJuanjr

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How did you end up responding with that last conversation you posted?
 

SargeMaximus

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I still havent because I don’t know where to take it. I figure it’s over
 

DonJuanjr

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If that's the case, you should have just tried my re-framed suggestion. If it didn't work, you'd still be where you're at now. And we'd know if it was too qualifying or not(at least with that chick).
 
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