You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
AfRoSwiss-Disiac said:
Yea man you need to fix your profile to what YOU expect not what THEY expect. I like how you have your profile on private. But sometimes this is good sometimes bad. You may need to be the one browsing for females instead of them looking for you. And suit your profile to what you look for. You like to have fun? post pics of you hangin out with the boys and having funBlackmm said:
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
So true. An aside; there seems to be an societal issue with women who have biracial children being able to be accepted by men of their own culture after breaking up with the child's father. It also seems as if the women set the race of the child as the foremost qualifier for their perspective partners. Don't mean for this to become a thread about race, just giving some insight.AfRoSwiss-Disiac said:
Francisco d'Anconia said:
LOL lowerd herself? wow if america stilll thinks this then america is ****ed upKarmaSutra said:
Well said 'Cisco. Don't worry though, someone will turn this into a racial issue.
It seems to me that women who have bi-racial children who return to the market are desired by neither race. It's as if she has "lowered herself" in either eyes of the men she's trying to gain attention.
Yea but who would want to date a narrow minded women anywase? who expects "since i have a biracial child all black men will want me? NOTFrancisco d'Anconia said:
Sad, but I can see that happening. It goes to question if it's about the guy's principles or his ego. Is it that he wouldn't want to raise another man's child or a specific man's child. Then of course, how he now views the woman. Is she a a single mother who didn't have a solid relationship or is she a woman who crossed over and doesn't deserve crossing back.KarmaSutra said:
Well said 'Cisco. Don't worry though, someone will turn this into a racial issue.
It seems to me that women who have bi-racial children who return to the market are desired by neither race. It's as if she has "lowered herself" in either eyes of the men she's trying to gain attention.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
I'm right with you on that. People typically gravitate to what they are accustomed to which tend to be social stereotypes.AfRoSwiss-Disiac said:
