"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Asking out a girl from a very small bootcamp class. Bad idea?

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"Very small" as in there are around 12 members, but around six who show up all four days of the week. Me and her are two of the main ones. We've also been talking a *lot* before and after class, and I think she's into me.

The reason I'm hesitant? this is a very small group in an ongoing class that's been meeting since December of last year. This isn't like a cold approach. If it backfires, we'll have to awkwardly avoid talking to each other in a tiny gym room for four days a week for the rest of the year.

Avoid this one?
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Uncharted

Master Don Juan
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No just casually ask her for her phone number. If she says she has a BF or whatever then just say Oh ok thats cool. It won't be weird unless you make it weird. Best case you get her number, worst case she has a BF and you never see her again after this class.

I've been in this type of situation before. Better to have asked and found out she has a BF than not ask and wonder about her for the rest of your life!
 

visions

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why the hell would a female be in a pick up bootcamp with a bunch of men and and not expect to be hit on? her being there is a signal that all are welcome to apply. go for it.
 
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visions said:
why the hell would a female be in a pick up bootcamp with a bunch of men and and not expect to be hit on? her being there is a signal that all are welcome to apply. go for it.
Actually...it's just me and the girls. The men are all in the morning class.

it's like i've died and gone to heaven. (well, counting out the two fatties.)
 

visions

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starfishandcoffee said:
Actually...it's just me and the girls. The men are all in the morning class.

it's like i've died and gone to heaven. (well, counting out the two fatties.)

a bootcamp for females? strange. i'm leaning that the women there are dtf.
go for it
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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visions said:
a bootcamp for females? strange. i'm leaning that the women there are dtf.
go for it
Yeah...mostly late 20s, early 30s crowd. a good portion of them do have "I need a man" written all over them.
 

Sik

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Starfishandcoffee,

I'm not certain what is going on here.

Is this is a "bootcamp" for those who want to get in to a long term relationship or is this a 24-Hr fitness bootcamp with instructors and some variation of Tae-Bo?

Regardless, you may as well chat her up and see if she's game for a post-workout coffee / smoothie / drink. I know there's a lot of girls I wish I had asked out but didn't. Now I'm a lot more bold, but those missed opportunities...
 
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Sik said:
Is this is a "bootcamp" for those who want to get in to a long term relationship or is this a 24-Hr fitness bootcamp with instructors and some variation of Tae-Bo?
A very, very intense workout class - four days a week, mixture of weights, cardio, and whatever crazy stuff my instructors want to inflict on us. I'm surprised we've even had time to talk...half of the time we're all panting like hell.

I'm not nervous about asking her out - I'm getting good at asking girls out lately. I'm nervous about this possibly getting awkward if she says no. It's a very close knit group of people I see four days a week, and girls...well, they talk.

(They've also known each other for about four months...far longer than few weeks I've been in the class.)

I'm probably overthinking this...
 

Sik

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Ah, I see. This is actually in your favor. Reference: http://www.sosuave.com/articles/at/liketolove.htm

I think you're right in that you're over thinking it. If she has a boyfriend, she'll just say she can't make it to whatever you suggest. The only place I don't ask girls out is where I work. My paycheck is more important that any vagina.

Anyways, ask her out! There won't be any awkwardness, she'll probably be flattered. If anything, the other girls will be wondering why you didn't choose them and then will feel insecure.

When is the next time you're going to this class? I'm going to be following up, Starfish!
 
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Monday.

(I actually have a followup date with another girl that night. This is gonna be a great summer...)
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

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