"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

Anyone here have a drinking problem?

Crissco

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 12, 2009
Messages
1,396
Reaction score
118
Age
39
Location
New York
I do...I sometimes finish 10-12 beers a night, by my self, alone in my room. My drinking problem lead to the breakup of my last relationship. I only started drinking to help me sleep at 19 years old(35 now). As time went on it got worse and worse, I even ended up getting a DWI at 22 years old and spent a night in jail and put on probation. After that I stayed sober for 6 months then gradually started drinking again. The drinking really got worse about 3 years ago when I was in my relationship. I would go as far as a to hide it from her since she didn't like me drinking because she knew i went out of control and changed to a completely different person.

Funny enough i don't want to stop drinking, I want to cut down, but i cant do it like that. For me its all or nothing, I either drink or I don't, no in-between...

Anyone here been in this situation before and can relate in any which way?



Crissco
 
Last edited:

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

Doctor Europeo

Moderator
Joined
Mar 6, 2017
Messages
4,427
Reaction score
4,817
Location
Mexico
Try the "I Am Sober" app. Its free.

There is other stuff you can try to help you sleep. Good luck brother. We are all rooting for you.
 

Stanley

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 6, 2022
Messages
1,097
Reaction score
1,296
My cousin who was a drug addict and alcoholic and was in and out of prison never knocked his habits through rehab. His father my uncle was an alcoholic and gave him this book. He isn't sober and still smokes weed/cigs, but cut back the drinking immensely. Worth a shot

Allen Carr's Quit Drinking Without Willpower: Be a happy
 

BillyPilgrim

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 9, 2021
Messages
6,121
Reaction score
4,947
I do too, it phucks up my lightweight stomach and I have to limit how much I can drink. Meh.
 

Modern Man Advice

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 3, 2021
Messages
1,462
Reaction score
2,576
I do...I sometimes finish 10-12 beers a night, by my self, alone in my room. My drinking problem lead to the breakup of my last relationship. I only started drinking to help me sleep at 19 years old(35 now). As time went on it got worse and worse, I even ended up getting a DWI at 22 years old and spent a night in jail and put on probation. After that I stayed sober for 6 months then gradually started drinking again. The drinking really got worse about 3 years ago when I was in my relationship. I would go as far as a to hide it from her since she didn't like me drinking because she knew i went out of control and changed to a completely different person.

Funny enough i don't want to start drinking, I want to cut down, but i cant do it like that. For me its all or nothing, I either drink or I don't, no in-between...

Anyone here been in this situation before and can relate in any which way?



Crissco
I don't have a drinking problem but I can tell you that reaching out to seek perspective is very admirable and I respect that.

From what I know about alcoholism is that it has one of the, if not the most, bad withdrawals of any drug because of how dependent your body becomes on it. I think that is the reason why just cutting it down is not feasible or recommended.

So you are right, it is all or nothing. Go cold turkey, use the app that @Dr.Suave recommended, seek a therapist, a support group, someone that can keep you accountable for, etc.

Whatever you do, do not do it alone. There are many people going through what you are about to go through if you decide to quit cold turkey.

You got this man. And continue seeking perspective and support through the manosphere community.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

Gamisch

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 2, 2022
Messages
5,326
Reaction score
6,219
I have a love hate hate relationship with alcohol. I believe I can control myself, but after the sweet spot of having three beers I ALWAYS drink more, and especially more often.

Again, I used to believe I wasnt a alcoholic and I could cut , or control drinking anytime. Nobody gave me that title officially (also due my habit of binging rather alone than in company of other peopele) .

For me alcohol ( thank GOD) has serious repercussions. I'll swole up like a feckkng balloon, I cant train, I am spending money going out more, I "randomly" wake up feeling sick throwing up. The worst perhaps is that I devolped this personality that can only appear due bing drinking and I just feel like I am shorting my (quality)time on this earth.

So I came to the conclusion that I had to cut it out completely. Nada. Kinda anxious about next summer, because I still love parties and year after year I manage to quit, drink a few at parties and boom ,back to almost daily heavy drinking . Just gave you a personal view as that was your initial question.

I would seriously consider quitting all together ..if you are anything like me, than you are part of the club of people who simply cant handle the bottle and should be extremely cautious and conscious about your drinking. What really helps for me is exercising like a maniac. I started doing boxing again, hit the heavy weights. I just started with drinking less while training until I could completly let it go.

If you believe there's a underlying problem or reason to your drinking such as depression, that I would advice you to seek professional help.

 

Kotaix

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 29, 2019
Messages
2,236
Reaction score
2,822
Age
48
To echo @Gamisch , You should think about just quitting drinking altogether if you have this bad of a problem. If you don't, you're going to wake up one day with some kind of condition (cirrhosis, cancer, prison, etc) that you could have prevented if you'd quit.

I struggled for years to quit weed, but once it started causing me asthma after every time I smoked, it got VERY easy to quit when I started thinking about things like lung cancer and emphysema.
 

BackInTheGame78

Moderator
Joined
Sep 10, 2014
Messages
16,939
Reaction score
19,255
Have you gone to AA?

You are going to have a very short life if you don't make some significant changes soon.
 

Divorced w 3

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 20, 2022
Messages
3,874
Reaction score
2,523
Have you gone to AA?

You are going to have a very short life if you don't make some significant changes soon.
Seconded.
My other suggestion, stock up on sweets while you go cold. Alcohol and sugar are cousins chemically, and you will need to replicate the effects so your body can absorb the hit from the withdrawal. Soda, candy, cookies, and AA. If you really feel like it’s going to be ugly, there is NO SHAME in getting over to a hospital and spending a couple days. Medical insurance not necessary. All emergency rooms have to take you. You’ll be fine. PM me if you want.
 
Top